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consumptionist

Member
Donor
Aug 7, 2019
334
1,140
There is one glaring issue I don't get that makes the wifes "well thought out" plan seem like it wasn't very well thought out even though it's for plot reasons it's still incredibly silly.

So, the daughters life is in danger, his ex new this and sent documents to him saying she'd lied to the daughter to keep her safe.

Why then, if she is in so much danger and only her dad can help, did the ex not also send something to the daughter to let her know she lied therefore she would go to her dad and be a bit safer?

Convoluted plan has glaring plot holes.

Normally I can overlook them, like I said, I know it's for story reasons but it's a big damn hole.
you do make a valid point.
and yet, my first thought was 'why the hell would you not send the daughter to somewhere safe if she is in danger?'.
even if sending her to her father. waiting 3 days upon death to start her safety just felt bonkers. if she is allegedly safe right now, then the whole reason for the dad falls apart somewhat :D

game does have alot of English slang dialect and does seem a bit overmuch where the sister is concerned, even though it is pretty close to my own English dialect, it does start to grate a little. otherwise, this is a very intriguing start and I wish the dev a happy success upon its conclusion.

Does this game have mom son? Inçest
nope. not yet anyway.
 

Jonny Skull

Member
Aug 7, 2017
342
538
there is not even a "mom" that has a son there in the game :rolleyes:
Hey there's the MC's mom! Remember how he looked at the pic of his wife,daughter, and mom and thought mom was rocking the bikini! Let's see he's 40 and she could have had him real young, maybe 15. That puts her in a workable 55. Don't count out mum yet!

Man still thinking about how the wife is so much trash. Also how at first I was jonesing for more of the sister, but what you learn got me thinking 'damn MC bro, sorry'.
 

ArturiousDesign

Engaged Member
Jan 31, 2019
3,971
14,953
The MC is so annoying and his Inner voice simply pisses me off. So much BLAH BLAH talking about nothing. Like I get we need exposition, but fuck talk about the plot not about whether your Black friend got some girl to Pretend to be a tranny when you were drunk. The MC spends so much time talking and being an asshole than just responding to other characters ...
 

Steinchen

Well-Known Member
Mar 3, 2017
1,113
2,146
Hey there's the MC's mom! Remember how he looked at the pic of his wife,daughter, and mom and thought mom was rocking the bikini! Let's see he's 40 and she could have had him real young, maybe 15. That puts her in a workable 55. Don't count out mum yet!

Man still thinking about how the wife is so much trash. Also how at first I was jonesing for more of the sister, but what you learn got me thinking 'damn MC bro, sorry'.
ok ok i give you that one
 

Azrayal

Member
Game Developer
May 31, 2018
121
1,098
Thank you all for the continued feedback and discussion.

As the dev of Triple Ex, I am aware that some of the character traits may not be to everyone’s taste and possibly annoying, but I believe I’d be doing a disservice if I portrayed them in a different manner as to how I envisioned them.

My main aim of this project is to bring a bit of enjoyment to the readers who find the story to their liking, while learning and hopefully improving my skills along the way.

I’ll be totally up front here, I’ve been a member of F95zone for a while now and I’ve read a lot of novels and mostly enjoyed them all. However, I am guilty being “that” person who would simply download a novel, read it, then move on to the next, neglecting to read comments or post my own.

After reading the comments on this post alone, the speculation, other people’s interpretations and thoughts, likes and dislikes, while being helpful, it is also fun, I enjoyed it. I must admit, it could be quite addictive.

I know some people may be disappointed in future updates, :)or maybe surprised, who knows!

Once again, whether you enjoyed the first instalment or not, I do appreciate you taking the time to download, read and comment, thanks.
 

voyeurkind

Well-Known Member
Jan 26, 2018
1,195
1,705
* You don't need to indicate characters' thoughts if you're altering the font.

* The conversation between Brutus and MC takes way too long.

* I'm saying to myself "get on with it" a lot while playing.

* All of the characters seem much more glib than they need to be.

* All of this dialogue is way too wordy.

* Deb's cute.

* It's an interesting story, I just wish it would move forward.

There's the makings of something good here, but the author really needs to examine the dialogue, as there's also the makings of a game that will make players die of boredom. The overall story is fine, but could easily have been covered in half the time.

I do wonder why there were any choices at all, as it doesn't seem as if any of them affect anything. If the author is wrting a kinetic novel he or she should just say so, as there is an audience for that.
 
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Ghostdanser

Member
Jul 12, 2017
162
311
So the story is good, a few rocky parts, but that can be sorted out later. An easy fix for not sending a letter to the daughter at the same time as the MC could be to have it contingent on his answer. If the MC agrees to help then the lawyers are to deliver a letter to the daughter and if not then she is not given a letter. The ex didn't want the daughter to hate her, so maybe only informed the daughter if she absolutely had to tell her. You could have the person delivering the letter to the daughter killed and the letter stolen, thus preserving your original progression, daughter never gets letter that was intended for her.

Renders are really good and the characters are interesting. My only real problem is with the MC's inner monologue that makes him sound more like a 13 year old pervert with the corresponding attention span. It's just kind of jarring, I get he's an asshole, that's fine, but it's hard to reconcile him as a hardcore military type when he can't even concentrate on the letter from his dead ex long enough to finish reading it without perving on his daughters pic.

As for upcoming twists, I have a sneaking suspicion that the ex may not be quite as dead as we think.

Overall, a pretty good start and I am definitely going to keep a watch out for updates. Thanks for the entertainment! All that aside, I have to admit that I also have been pretty much a lurker in the forums for the last few years. I just recently decided to post some comments, but I will try to be constructive with criticism.
 

Ghostdanser

Member
Jul 12, 2017
162
311
Yeah usually an author wouldn't make sure to note that there was no body otherwise. Hopefully she is alive so the MC can punch her right in her fucking mouth when they meet again(going off the currently available information we have).
I was just thinking more along the lines of not saying a word, just turning and walking away...but yeah, no love for her.
 

thekeelog

New Member
Aug 23, 2019
8
6
This is a solid start, but there are a couple seeds in this first release that could derail the whole thing. It seems almost certain that Deb and Marie stayed in contact even after Marie left the MC. That's kinda shitty of Deb, but if they maintained their sexual relationship, that's gonna be a deal breaker for me. It's one thing for Deb to fool around with MC's wife when he's away (I'd even include his incarceration), but to keep fucking with her after she divorced MC would be a bridge too far.

I'm okay with the MC's internal dialog, but I could see it getting annoying. I have a hard time believing that MC would have been able to rise through the military if he's constantly talking out loud to himself, so I hope it's the sort of thing he can put a lid on when it's prudent.

I'd like a little clarification from the dev on whether this is a VN or a kinetic novel. There was only one choice in this release, and, at least as it stands now, it's not going to matter.

This seems fairly critical, but this is very good for a first release. The renders are good, and with models I don't immediately recognize from a dozen other games, which is a refreshing change from most of the games we see here. The writing is pretty good, if wordy, which I like. I could do without the phonetic spelling of the regional dialog (fooking vs fucking, etc), but I'll put up a lot in exchange for (mostly) proper grammar and spelling.

Overall, I'm a fan, and I'm looking forward to the next update.
 

Ghostdanser

Member
Jul 12, 2017
162
311
This is a solid start, but there are a couple seeds in this first release that could derail the whole thing. It seems almost certain that Deb and Marie stayed in contact even after Marie left the MC. That's kinda shitty of Deb, but if they maintained their sexual relationship, that's gonna be a deal breaker for me. It's one thing for Deb to fool around with MC's wife when he's away (I'd even include his incarceration), but to keep fucking with her after she divorced MC would be a bridge too far.
It does look that way, but what just crossed my mind was that if Deb stayed in touch with the ex, then Deb most likely knows that the ex lied to his daughter. Can you imagine how that would play out?
 

Jonny Skull

Member
Aug 7, 2017
342
538
It does look that way, but what just crossed my mind was that if Deb stayed in touch with the ex, then Deb most likely knows that the ex lied to his daughter. Can you imagine how that would play out?
Heck go even beyond that. So the wife becomes this other guys beard and then tries to convince the daughter to allow herself to be adopted by said guy that she doesn't love and married to be his beard. So apparently while MC is in prison makes him sign away all parental claim and rights(the only way some other man could try to adopt his child without his consent). Then just so the daughter will stop asking about her father turn her against him(lol what). If ,as appears, the sister was still in contact with the wife she had to have known about all this stuff. It's like betrayal on an exponential scale by two who still claimed to love him.
 

Ghostdanser

Member
Jul 12, 2017
162
311
Heck go even beyond that. So the wife becomes this other guys beard and then tries to convince the daughter to allow herself to be adopted by said guy that she doesn't love and married to be his beard. So apparently while MC is in prison makes him sign away all parental claim and rights(the only way some other man could try to adopt his child without his consent). Then just so the daughter will stop asking about her father turn her against him(lol what). If ,as appears, the sister was still in contact with the wife she had to have known about all this stuff. It's like betrayal on an exponential scale by two who still claimed to love him.
Talk about a powder keg, definitely plenty of room for some twisted scenarios. Here's another nasty thought, what if Deb visited the ex and the daughter from time to time in person. I really will have to pay attention to this game.
 
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Steinchen

Well-Known Member
Mar 3, 2017
1,113
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what happend just now is a betrayel that normaly can´t be forgiven there that has crossed so many lines,but still in the end of this first version the MC goes to the spare bedroom to sleep,after he was called childisch from Deb and there he is doubting himself now if he is maybe the one who is wrong here now??
that all comes from 2 woman here who are saying that they love the MC so so much.
Maybe Deb does this on purpose to distract him from shit she does not want him to know here.

well i hope this is not going the wrong way now i hope that will change one way or another.

this MC has similarities with the MC in allison fall of the apple here.the only thing that is missing here is the MC to be more Strong willed and dominating for a EX/Special force soldier.
 
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