Well, the consistent thing is that the MC is a Rapey McRaperson in both scenarios. The first one is more disturbing, like a well-mannered serial murderer who comes across as polite, charming and romantic...right before they miss the turn to drive the girl home.
I think there's a bit of a push behind threads like this to, well, "make better games". That is, make games that are erotic, entertaining, "gratifying" and yet better written with better dialogue, better plotting and more consistent characterization. We have a whole porn game tropes thread which points out a lot of the clichés, good and bad, in the genre as it is. These games proliferate...if you check the "latest games" alpha build, you'll note there's something like 2800 games released over the past 2 years. Not all of them complete, but that's a dizzying release rate for a genre that's profoundly undercapitalized compared to mainstream electronic gaming(which is a multibillion dollar industry--this one is barely multimillions, not counting the plethora of flash games on porn sites).
I tend to think that constant peeping(as opposed to inadvertent or one-off), groping, blackmail, drugging, sleep-raping, and physical coercion(Dark Neighborhood has a scene where the brother forces the sister's head down underwater to suck his cock--that's textbook sexual assault, folks) all tend to fall into "dark fantasy" and "non-consensual" tag categories. It is true that many games give the player the option to not do these things, but in some cases you almost have to in order to advance the story. Installing video cameras and pimping out the women of your family to the internet would also be "non consensual". Corruption which involves manipulation is kinda also shady. Corruption/Mind Control involving supernatural/superscience means at least has the virtue of pushing the scenario into "complete fantasy", and the darker behavior of the MC could simply indicate the corrupting effects of having such power over others.
I suppose the developers could essentially put a disclaimer over this stuff("potentially disturbing content which skirts the edges of consensual behavior" or somesuch).
I guess I'm not calling for "rape shaming" devs or those who like this stuff, but maybe to be more mindful of what kind of fap game you really want to make--"nice guy finds a way to better his luck with women" or "skeevy perv does whatever it takes to gratify himself". It could be you offer both options to the player and they decide what kind of person the MC is going to be.