- Feb 16, 2023
- 2,249
- 5,893
Just send him an extra hand to hold, and a container of what comes out after you clean her each morning.
- Thread starter digi.B
- Start date
- Jun 28, 2022
- 3,272
- 5,098
If Puppy eyes did not work , so , Arty is mine OR ELSE ?No. I got beat up comin in this thread sayin I only wanted Artemis. I earned this. She's mine.
Booom
- Jul 17, 2021
- 8,925
- 13,646
- Jul 17, 2021
- 8,925
- 13,646
- Jun 28, 2022
- 3,272
- 5,098
- Jun 28, 2022
- 3,272
- 5,098
- Jul 17, 2021
- 8,925
- 13,646
Sorry. Not sorry. I don't share. But hey, look on the bright side, she's already on your computer/device. I can't actually stop you. Unless I hack you. But I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed and wouldn't know how.
- May 11, 2020
- 10,543
- 15,971
Unless I hack you. But I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed and wouldn't know how.
Hint: wrong aproach......
- Jun 28, 2022
- 3,272
- 5,098
I did it already , you miss my post earlier
- Jul 17, 2021
- 8,925
- 13,646
- Jan 18, 2022
- 1,010
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Happy New Week!
Mostly uneventful week. Just posing and rendering.
I also realize I've pretty much been working on several parts that are making up CH6. I hadn't shared anything outside of the technical stuff. So here's a teaser for everyone.
VR + Android = ...?
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Have yourselves a great week, and stay safe!
- digi.B
- Oct 24, 2018
- 3,537
- 26,004
Artemis DevLog CH6
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Happy New Week!
Nothing much to report this week. Mostly posing and some dialogue rework. As well as some coding.
I considered providing a preview for Artemis' 'cooing' sound, but thought I'd leave it a surprise. I'm slowly chipping away at that and the addition will be released alongside the next update. When I worked with the VA on it, I had her give me different variations of the mood so that there's little repetition. I mentioned this in a previous log and wanted to touch on it again.
With all the assets and environments I've been converting/creating for this chapter, there won't be any scenes from Chapter 1 being remastered. The community seems split on that. A lot ask if CH1 is ever going to get remastered. While the other side would rather, I focus on the update. It's kind of a lose/lose in my case, lol. But like I've said before. If I've got the time to remaster a scene, I'll do one. We just won't be seeing one done this update.
Have yourselves a great week and stay safe out there!
- digi.B
I love how straight digi.B is with us. Guy gets me a little hot and bothered around the collar.
- Jun 21, 2022
- 2,843
- 3,109
- Dec 30, 2021
- 134
- 124
Personal opinion of course but... she looks way better with the cyborg jaw.
- Nov 21, 2022
- 1,000
- 4,389
must agree with you, there's something about the exposed cybernetics that give her a unique look... but i'm satisfied with a fully human artemis too.
I don't know why I am doing this. I should probably write "awesome game, good job, 10/10".
But there is a problem. I think this developer is really promising, and there is a good chance that he can be really big. IF. If there is will to work on some easily fixable areas.
This is one of the posts which will probably come across as whining, even though I think this is a good game among AVNs as is. But for some reason all I see is that this developer has real potential, let's encourage maybe a step forward?
Some examples on what could be improved with a bit of planning and consulting a creative writing college student.
1: trimming the fat
What is written and makes it into the game should always serve a purpose. If that scene or location doesn't serve a purpose, nothing important happens, it is just time and talent wasted. (possibly also money, if it requires buying assets)
A good example for this is the sorority in the game. The PC could meet most of the girls as colleagues while working for Reina, already knows June, Cassandra and Kindra. Is the sorority in the game because an AVn should have one? Isn't a nice office to meet the girls enough? In my opinion the early game would be much improved if the PC was hired by Reina instead of Kindra (easier access to all main girls).
Every developer can go through the draft with the sole aim of trimming the fat. Do I need this location and buy the assets? Can something else stand in for it? Are these two characters necessary, doing the same stuff (or, often, standing idle!), or should I merge them instead? (even pros struggle with this. Reacher season 2 has Frances Neagley and Karla Dixon, who should have been merged. If these were merged the resulting character would be a competent person. As is, they do nothing most of the time, and the writers struggled to find things for them to do)
2: foreshadowing
This is difficult to verbalize for a non native english speaker Basically if you throw awesome moments without a proper foreshadowing, the players will not really be an awe. More likely "cool, I guess". A good example in the game is the walk around the Batcave with Kindra.
This is not easy to pull off, not at all. Many good writers struggle with it. If it is too obvious, the players will figure out future events, so it doesn't work. If it is super hidden, the payoff will come out of the blue, and will feel like a deus ex machina.
Well, yup, it is difficult for me. Critical drinker's "setup and payoff" to the rescue. Don'T mind it is for movies, it is true for writing and games too.
3: challenge, failiure
It is very difficult to root for characters who do not struggle. It's just basic human nature.
The most popular character arc is encountering some kind of challenge, which actually seems impossible to defeat for the protagonist. Improvement, change is needed, which leads to struggles, failiure (!), setbacks. Digesting these failiures lead to a new understanding, where the protagonist (with, maybe the help of a mentor) can finally overcome the challenge. Very important: doing ones best and failing does _not_ make a character weak, it is a tool to make personal growth beliveable. If there is no challenge, no fail, then there is no growth either! The characters starts awesome and ends awesome, basically nothing happens (only that I hate the guy already).
In game: protagonist has 30 bucks, not place to stay, no job. Everyone was young starting up his career, living in shithole apartments rented with three friends, working two jobs to pay the bills, so this is easy to relate. Looking forward to how the protagonist overcomes this! Oh, he gets 1500€, a place to stay, a car to use, his dream job, and about eight sexy women who fully support him in his struggles for some reason. In a week! That's convenient!
4: Mary Sue. wikipedia instert
"A Mary Sue is a character archetype in fiction, usually a young woman, who is often portrayed as inexplicably competent across all domains, gifted with unique talents or powers, liked or respected by most other characters, unrealistically free of weaknesses, extremely attractive, innately virtuous, and/or generally lacking meaningful character flaws"
I'm sorry but this is Kindra, like, literally. It is also the main reason why I found everyone else more interesting, despite Kindra being so central to the game.
(to be fair, there are many interesting characters in the game! To me Reina, Zelda and Naomi are superb. They key to me seems to be that they are very strong in certain areas, but vulnerable in others, which is a nice dynamic. This is really missing with Kindra)
I wanted to write these basic examples because these are easy to improve. Just a short writing course. Every writing teacher there is will say, that if one knows the basics, fuck off and start writing. The first 10000 pages will be shit, but afterwards you will see improvement.
But the key is to know the very basics. Maybe not even a full course is needed, just sending over the draft to a creative writing major (the ones I knew in college would read through it for a six pack), and discuss the problems she found over a few drinks.
I'm not sure if this will come across as whining. But I wanted to write these up, because I really think that the dev is talented.
#gets ready for flak
#good intentions
But there is a problem. I think this developer is really promising, and there is a good chance that he can be really big. IF. If there is will to work on some easily fixable areas.
This is one of the posts which will probably come across as whining, even though I think this is a good game among AVNs as is. But for some reason all I see is that this developer has real potential, let's encourage maybe a step forward?
Some examples on what could be improved with a bit of planning and consulting a creative writing college student.
1: trimming the fat
What is written and makes it into the game should always serve a purpose. If that scene or location doesn't serve a purpose, nothing important happens, it is just time and talent wasted. (possibly also money, if it requires buying assets)
A good example for this is the sorority in the game. The PC could meet most of the girls as colleagues while working for Reina, already knows June, Cassandra and Kindra. Is the sorority in the game because an AVn should have one? Isn't a nice office to meet the girls enough? In my opinion the early game would be much improved if the PC was hired by Reina instead of Kindra (easier access to all main girls).
Every developer can go through the draft with the sole aim of trimming the fat. Do I need this location and buy the assets? Can something else stand in for it? Are these two characters necessary, doing the same stuff (or, often, standing idle!), or should I merge them instead? (even pros struggle with this. Reacher season 2 has Frances Neagley and Karla Dixon, who should have been merged. If these were merged the resulting character would be a competent person. As is, they do nothing most of the time, and the writers struggled to find things for them to do)
2: foreshadowing
This is difficult to verbalize for a non native english speaker
Basically if you throw awesome moments without a proper foreshadowing, the players will not really be an awe. More likely "cool, I guess". A good example in the game is the walk around the Batcave with Kindra.This is not easy to pull off, not at all. Many good writers struggle with it. If it is too obvious, the players will figure out future events, so it doesn't work. If it is super hidden, the payoff will come out of the blue, and will feel like a deus ex machina.
Well, yup, it is difficult for me. Critical drinker's "setup and payoff" to the rescue. Don'T mind it is for movies, it is true for writing and games too.
You must be registered to see the links
3: challenge, failiure
It is very difficult to root for characters who do not struggle. It's just basic human nature.
The most popular character arc is encountering some kind of challenge, which actually seems impossible to defeat for the protagonist. Improvement, change is needed, which leads to struggles, failiure (!), setbacks. Digesting these failiures lead to a new understanding, where the protagonist (with, maybe the help of a mentor) can finally overcome the challenge. Very important: doing ones best and failing does _not_ make a character weak, it is a tool to make personal growth beliveable. If there is no challenge, no fail, then there is no growth either! The characters starts awesome and ends awesome, basically nothing happens (only that I hate the guy already).
In game: protagonist has 30 bucks, not place to stay, no job. Everyone was young starting up his career, living in shithole apartments rented with three friends, working two jobs to pay the bills, so this is easy to relate. Looking forward to how the protagonist overcomes this! Oh, he gets 1500€, a place to stay, a car to use, his dream job, and about eight sexy women who fully support him in his struggles for some reason. In a week! That's convenient!
4: Mary Sue. wikipedia instert
"A Mary Sue is a character archetype in fiction, usually a young woman, who is often portrayed as inexplicably competent across all domains, gifted with unique talents or powers, liked or respected by most other characters, unrealistically free of weaknesses, extremely attractive, innately virtuous, and/or generally lacking meaningful character flaws"
I'm sorry but this is Kindra, like, literally. It is also the main reason why I found everyone else more interesting, despite Kindra being so central to the game.
(to be fair, there are many interesting characters in the game! To me Reina, Zelda and Naomi are superb. They key to me seems to be that they are very strong in certain areas, but vulnerable in others, which is a nice dynamic. This is really missing with Kindra)
I wanted to write these basic examples because these are easy to improve. Just a short writing course. Every writing teacher there is will say, that if one knows the basics, fuck off and start writing. The first 10000 pages will be shit, but afterwards you will see improvement.
But the key is to know the very basics. Maybe not even a full course is needed, just sending over the draft to a creative writing major (the ones I knew in college would read through it for a six pack), and discuss the problems she found over a few drinks.
I'm not sure if this will come across as whining. But I wanted to write these up, because I really think that the dev is talented.
#gets ready for flak
#good intentions
- May 30, 2020
- 91
- 286
I’m struggling to understand how someone playing through this game could come to the conclusion that Kindra is “competent across all domains” and “unrealistically free of weaknesses”.
--Unrealistically Free of Weaknesses
Even just taking the latest update, we see Kindra utterly overwhelmed with stress, anxiety, and doubts. She by her own admission is “not fit to run a company”, the inevitable consequence we end up seeing at the press conference. Aside from her stresses over starting up her parent’s business again, she is also an impulsive and fairly temperamental person.
-Inexplicably Competent Across All Domains
As far as her being competent across all domains, it is true she is a very intelligent girl, no doubt about it. In addition, she’s also particularly talented at engineering, and as evidenced by her career as a DJ, she’s quite skilled in music. All that said, are her competencies inexplicable and across all domains? To that, I’d say no. First the inexplicable part, she is the only child of two of the leading scientists and inventors of new technologies in the world at the time. More than that she had, bullying aside, the chance at as least as good of an education as the mc had.
Now, saying she is inexplicably competent across ALL domains is silly. She herself says she’s more of a mechanical engineer than a programmer. Hence being unable to complete Artemis herself, and needing the MC's help. Further, when Koko is taken down and needs to be fixed up, she’s utterly lost and helpless. It isn’t until someone else skilled in chemistry is brought in that the problem starts getting resolved. Those are just two of the more obvious examples we’ve seen so far. Some other prominent examples were mentioned previously, mostly related to business and public speaking.
Ultimately though, imo, it is Kindra's weaknesses more than her strengths that define her character's place in the story up til now. Will she grow as a character and overcome them? Who knows, but I'm excited to keep reading and playing to find out.
#providing the flak
#good intentions
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