VN Ren'Py Abandoned Buried Desires [v0.5] [Betisis]

[CorruptKing]

Related to Betsis seeing the criticism here, I would like to clarify that my own criticism was purely based on confusion of how the plot got from .1 to .2 where it felt like the plot kinda just... vanished in between. I didn't intend to attack their skill or their person even remotely, I simply wanted to point out things could definitely be improved.

I really hope that is what came across with my comment and review. I am happy to update my review pending future updates if things change. I'm not the type to leave negative reviews hanging when I could otherwise say a good word to someone about their work.

 

[Deleted member 1754336]

Agreed. I panned the update, but this can easily be turned around and become a great game when its complete. The author just needs to be keep their head up, be receptive of our critiques and adjust accordingly. Honestly not a big deal.

 

[MrLKX]

I don't want sound like a prick, but the dev should know and have planed the story before he actually makes the game (at

Well, I was merely suggesting an approach to a solution. The simplest option would be to make 0.2 a dream and have the MC wake up again where his niece knocked him down. However, I think that would make a lot of people feel screwed again. Unfortunately, if you've messed something up, you have to live with the fact that you have a lot of work ahead of you.

As for your statement about planning the plot, I agree, that's also something I suspected.

What else I would suggest: find people to test it before release and be trustworthy enough not to leak it. If he already had such people then and waved the 0.2 through: Release from their service and find new people,

 

[Duke Leo]

Okay, I just finished 0.2 and...what? I won't dive into too much detail here, because it's been well discussed already, but the dev really needs to put the breaks on this, for his own benefit. He's trying to do way too much with this story too quickly. As I see it, the dev has setup a ton of LIs, including three daughters, two nieces, one sister, a wife, eight students, the principle, the secretary, the other teacher, the girl in the "religious neighborhood", and the therapist. So that's 20 (21 if you think the daughter's girlfriend will be an LI). The setup is a "lecherous teacher/father" scenario with great possibilities. He did mix in some weird alpha bullshit with some random bodyguard for some reason, but the story had not committed to anything major with that yet. There is some previous drama from pre-story and the MC is clearly a control freak with some issues. All good, and honestly an already full plate to develop.

So with all of that going on, the dev decides to branch out even further? Add more LI's and some high drama/violence in the 0.2 update? It's like if a college game suddenly developed a noir detective plotline in the 2nd update. I don't know why it's there and it doesn't make any sense in the context of what has already been written. I personally don't like anything in 0.2 because it completely leaves behind everything that intrigued me in 0.1 and started something new. It's like two different games.

There have already been plenty of good suggestions for possibly fixing this story, so I won't throw out my 2 cents. But the game does need to be fixed. Or divided up. One lecherous teacher/father game and one "taken"/bad-ass MC fights for the girl game, PhillyGames is a good example of the latter.

Whatever happens, I'll keep lurking, but my $$ will stay in my pocket until I see more of where this game is going.

 

[Crimsonfiend76]

Okay, I just finished 0.2 and...what? I won't dive into too much detail here, because it's been well discussed already, but the dev really needs to put the breaks on this, for his own benefit. He's trying to do way too much with this story too quickly. As I see it, the dev has setup a ton of LIs, including three daughters, two nieces, one sister, a wife, eight students, the principle, the secretary, the other teacher, the girl in the "religious neighborhood", and the therapist. So that's 20 (21 if you think the daughter's girlfriend will be an LI). The setup is a "lecherous teacher/father" scenario with great possibilities. He did mix in some weird alpha bullshit with some random bodyguard for some reason, but the story had not committed to anything major with that yet. There is some previous drama from pre-story and the MC is clearly a control freak with some issues. All good, and honestly an already full plate to develop.

So with all of that going on, the dev decides to branch out even further? Add more LI's and some high drama/violence in the 0.2 update? It's like if a college game suddenly developed a noir detective plotline in the 2nd update. I don't know why it's there and it doesn't make any sense in the context of what has already been written. I personally don't like anything in 0.2 because it completely leaves behind everything that intrigued me in 0.1 and started something new. It's like two different games.

There have already been plenty of good suggestions for possibly fixing this story, so I won't throw out my 2 cents. But the game does need to be fixed. Or divided up. One lecherous teacher/father game and one "taken"/bad-ass MC fights for the girl game, PhillyGames is a good example of the latter.

Whatever happens, I'll keep lurking, but my $$ will stay in my pocket until I see more of where this game is going.

Well said, and I agree completely. I don't want to accuse the dev of being pretentious with the ridiculous newly shoe-horned plotlines further complicating a story that while interesting, wasn't too complicated to begin with and didn't require the added drama to start off.

Maybe he felt the pressure to justify his vision or make his work stand out more and appeal to a broader range of possible future supporters? Either way, I'm sure he's aware of the HUGE MISS this update was and either takes the constructive criticism to heart, or decides to tell the story he wants and proves us all wrong in the end...

 

[Duke Leo]

Well said, and I agree completely. I don't want to accuse the dev of being pretentious with the ridiculous newly shoe-horned plotlines further complicating a story that while interesting, wasn't too complicated to begin with and didn't require the added drama to start off.

Maybe he felt the pressure to justify his vision or make his work stand out more and appeal to a broader range of possible future supporters? Either way, I'm sure he's aware of the HUGE MISS this update was and either takes the constructive criticism to heart, or decides to tell the story he wants and proves us all wrong in the end...

The cynic in me is worried that 0.1 was the money grab. Get some wallets open with the some popular subjects like incest and high school/loli girls to start the money flow for the VN that he actually wanted to make. Which is the VN we saw in 0.2. The thing is, 0.2 isn't bad on it's own, it just fails as a continuation of 0.1.

If I put my tinfoil hat on, the signs are there. The MC doesn't act like a teacher, he acts like a vigilante/mafioso and dresses like one too. There are even subtle allusions to The Sopranos and The Deluca Family. I mean, the crazy niece who is all crazy/tough AND sweet inside is named Luna. Again, maybe I'm creating connections where none exist, but the more I think about this, the more I feel like 0.2 is the real story dev wants to tell. Just look at the side-story. It's about power-plays and the MC being a bad-ass savior. It's about drama.

 

[a1n1d1]

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.”

 

[Crimsonfiend76]

The cynic in me is worried that 0.1 was the money grab. Get some wallets open with the some popular subjects like incest and high school/loli girls to start the money flow for the VN that he actually wanted to make. Which is the VN we saw in 0.2. The thing is, 0.2 isn't bad on it's own, it just fails as a continuation of 0.1.

If I put my tinfoil hat on, the signs are there. The MC doesn't act like a teacher, he acts like a vigilante/mafioso and dresses like one too. There are even subtle allusions to The Sopranos and The Deluca Family. I mean, the crazy niece who is all crazy/tough AND sweet inside is named Luna. Again, maybe I'm creating connections where none exist, but the more I think about this, the more I feel like 0.2 is the real story dev wants to tell. Just look at the side-story. It's about power-plays and the MC being a bad-ass savior. It's about drama.

I'm right there with you in regards to .2 not being 'bad' per se, it just doesn't fit exactly, especially the way its told with weird side characters trying to be mysterious without any sense of real context that ties together all of his releases so far. While the MC has always been protective of his family, his overall demeanor and choices made in .2 are all over the place, like if he's suffering from some sort of manic episode.

I still maintain it could have been tweaked a bit and released after at least an update or 2 to better tie into the overall story. IMO, the dangerous people Luna seem to be in business/involved with could and should stay on the periphery to what the main story of an ex-teacher coming back to dust himself off from a traumatic event and attempt to start over while dealing with his work/school life and home life. To me that's what I envisioned this story being about, along with all the temptations along the way.

 

[TommyTuba]

Just played the redhead twins' side story and must say I like it. The main story is interesting too.
The only thing I don't like at all is the hairstyle of the MC's youngest daughter. Looking forward to future updates!

You are so right about the hairstyle. Yikes. Awful.

 

[Kukipett]

The cynic in me is worried that 0.1 was the money grab. Get some wallets open with the some popular subjects like incest and high school/loli girls to start the money flow for the VN that he actually wanted to make. Which is the VN we saw in 0.2. The thing is, 0.2 isn't bad on it's own, it just fails as a continuation of 0.1.

If I put my tinfoil hat on, the signs are there. The MC doesn't act like a teacher, he acts like a vigilante/mafioso and dresses like one too. There are even subtle allusions to The Sopranos and The Deluca Family. I mean, the crazy niece who is all crazy/tough AND sweet inside is named Luna. Again, maybe I'm creating connections where none exist, but the more I think about this, the more I feel like 0.2 is the real story dev wants to tell. Just look at the side-story. It's about power-plays and the MC being a bad-ass savior. It's about drama.

That's an interesting point of view, i would also agree that the dev changed his mind or maybe was asked to give up with the 1000 times viewed school/loli/incest setting.
But there is still the fact that the first part was quite well written, the special twin episode too, but the second part was quite rushed with pointless sex encounters, strange dialogues and events and things that make no sense, like the fact that those mafioso found Luna in that motel where the MC went without any particular reason.
It seems that the dev just compiled some sex scenes just to give some fap material and did not even care to build a story that makes sense.
And the MC seem to totally lose control, as you said he doesn't look and behaves like a teacher and seems close to madness.
Maybe it's the new plot, the fact that the MC totally looses it, than find himself dying in a hotel room and has flashback of his life and the story of the dead girl.
It could be the new game story and all we have seen would be some intro.

 

[Watcher X]

The cynic in me is worried that 0.1 was the money grab. Get some wallets open with the some popular subjects like incest and high school/loli girls to start the money flow for the VN that he actually wanted to make. Which is the VN we saw in 0.2. The thing is, 0.2 isn't bad on it's own, it just fails as a continuation of 0.1.

If I put my tinfoil hat on, the signs are there. The MC doesn't act like a teacher, he acts like a vigilante/mafioso and dresses like one too. There are even subtle allusions to The Sopranos and The Deluca Family. I mean, the crazy niece who is all crazy/tough AND sweet inside is named Luna. Again, maybe I'm creating connections where none exist, but the more I think about this, the more I feel like 0.2 is the real story dev wants to tell. Just look at the side-story. It's about power-plays and the MC being a bad-ass savior. It's about drama.

The more I think about this comment the more I agree with it. I'm also a deep hardcore cynic so your premise isn't a giant leap for me.

It's probably the reason I felt so disconnected from 0.2, because I don't enjoy gangster, mafioso type stories. I've never watched Sopranos or played Deluca because that genre doesn't intertest me. I was just hoping for some light sexy school girl fluff, and instead I got whacked in the head with heavy, dark, sleazy themes like drugs and sex in a dank motel with a runaway drug addict and gangsters.

Well, I guess we will find out in 0.3 whether you can take your tin foil hat off or not.

 

[markus T]

Looking forward to content with those twins

 

[Badjourasmix]

The more I think about this comment the more I agree with it. I'm also a deep hardcore cynic so your premise isn't a giant leap for me.

It's probably the reason I felt so disconnected from 0.2, because I don't enjoy gangster, mafioso type stories. I've never watched Sopranos or played Deluca because that genre doesn't intertest me. I was just hoping for some light sexy school girl fluff, and instead I got whacked in the head with heavy, dark, sleazy themes like drugs and sex in a dank motel with a runaway drug addict and gangsters.

Well, I guess we will find out in 0.3 whether you can take your tin foil hat off or not.

Yeah 0.2 was so different from 0.1 that it felt like a completely different game. It really made me lose interest in the game I am just waiting for the next update to see where the story goes and decide if I keep playing it or not.

 

[Deleted member 3176988]

Betisis

Please don't take offense to this, but this game feels like a complete bait and switch. Your F95 profile picture is of Claire, who is a young loli. The game's load screen shows a pink background with half a dozen young lolis. But in the actual game you only interact with your middle aged wife, a gas station slut that looks even older than your wife, a motel junkie with a crackhead present, and a non-loli bitch that is completely covered in tats. What happened with the MC's daughters? What happened with all of the young female high school students? In the Prologue, your daughter Claire watched you as you fucked your wife, which was hot. That was taken out of the game with the promise that it would eventually be added again. Removing Claire's voyeurism made the kitchen scene boring, but I also do not understand why you made other parts of the kitchen blowjob scene worse too. In the Prologue, there was a much better BJ camera angle and animation. There were other lewd scenes with the other young daughters that were taken out as well. And after v0.1, v0.15, and v0.2, nothing even close to resembling those scenes has been added back into the game. The game feels so different now. It's like a completely different game. It's so serious, and all of the sex scenes that exist are boring and forgettable. Whenever someone recommends a loli game and mentions Buried Desires, I just want to facepalm or slap them in the face. Because this is not a loli game. And it isn't even close to being one even though the Prologue was as loli as they come. I don't like it when people are dishonest. And you couldn't even take two minutes out of the last 40 days to provide an honest explanation on why things have changed so drastically and what to expect in the future? You should just remove all the loli stuff. Remove the young loli daughters and female high school students from the game. Remove Claire as your F95 profile picture. Remove the lolis from the game's load screen. Remove the loli tag. And just start the game over for what it really is. A non-loli, pretentious, boring, and over-dramatic game that makes no sense and is no fun to play. So far, this game has only been about the most disgusting looking, trashy females that a person can find. Like ones you would find in an alley full of homeless people.

 

[Badjourasmix]

Betisis

Please don't take offense to this, but this game feels like a complete bait and switch. Your F95 profile picture is of Claire, who is a young loli. The game load screen shows a pink background with half a dozen young lolis. But in the actual game you only interact with your middle aged wife, a gas station slut that looks even older than your wife, a motel junkie with a crackhead present, and a non-loli bitch that is completely covered in tats. What happened with the daughters? What happened with all of the young female high school students? In the Prologue, your daughter Claire watched you as you fucked your wife, which was hot. That was taken out of the game with the promise that it would eventually be added again. Removing Claire's voyeurism made the kitchen scene boring, but I also do not understand why you re-did the kitchen blowjob scene and made it worse. In the Prologue, there was a much better BJ camera angle and animation. There were so many other lewd scenes with the other young daughters that were taken out as well. And after v0.1, v0.15, and v0.2, nothing even close to resembling those scenes has been added back into the game. The game feels so different now. It's like a completely different game. It's so serious, and all of the sex scenes that exist are boring and forgettable. Whenever someone recommends a loli game and mentions Buried Desires, I just want to facepalm or slap them in the face. Because this is not a loli game. And it isn't even close to being one even though the Prologue was as loli as they come. I don't like it when people are dishonest. And you couldn't even take two minutes out of the last 40 days to provide an explanation on why things have changed so drastically and what to expect in the future? You should just remove all the loli stuff. Remove the young loli daughters. Remove the young female high school students. Remove Claire as your F95 profile picture. Remove the lolis from the game's load screen. Remove the loli tag. And just start the game over for what it really is. A non-loli, pretentious, boring, and over-dramatic game that makes no sense and is no fun to play. So far, this game has only been about the most disgusting looking, trashy females that you can find in life. Like ones you would find in an alley full of homeless people.

My guess for him removing some of the lewd scenes with the girls from the initial release is that since there wasn't any actual sex scenes with any of them it wouldn't make sense for the dev to add a patch for that content yet and since they look really young it would be better to remove that content for now so he doesn't get in trouble with patreon. All the other stuff you mentioned, you won't really find that many people that will disagree with you, the vast majority of people don't seem to like the luna/mafia content. I like her design but all the interactions we had so far in the game, made me really dislike her.

 

[Duke Leo]

My guess for him removing some of the lewd scenes with the girls from the initial release is that since there wasn't any actual sex scenes with any of them it wouldn't make sense for the dev to add a patch for that content yet and since they look really young it would be better to remove that content for now so he doesn't get in trouble with patreon. All the other stuff you mentioned, you won't really find that many people that will disagree with you, the vast majority of people don't seem to like the luna/mafia content. I like her design but all the interactions we had so far in the game, made me really dislike her.

I like her design, but wish she had 80% fewer tats. I like the punk look l, but it doesn't mesh with the 0.1 version of the game. Tats are expensive and her not being around her family is a pretty recent thing.

But maybe I'm thinking to deeply on this.

 

[Badjourasmix]

I like her design, but wish she had 80% fewer tats. I like the punk look l, but it doesn't mesh with the 0.1 version of the game. Tats are expensive and her not being around her family is a pretty recent thing.

But maybe I'm thinking to deeply on this.

It could be one of those cases where the rebelious teen in order to defy her parents decides to go crazy and get a bunch of tattoos. I would be very happy if her tattoos were the only problem with the last update.

 

[HansDampf788]

I like her design, but wish she had 80% fewer tats. I like the punk look l, but it doesn't mesh with the 0.1 version of the game. Tats are expensive and her not being around her family is a pretty recent thing.

But maybe I'm thinking to deeply on this.

It could be one of those cases where the rebelious teen in order to defy her parents decides to go crazy and get a bunch of tattoos. I would be very happy if her tattoos were the only problem with the last update.

I like Luna's base model but yeah her tats are too much not a fan of them, I would say her arms are ok and maybe keep her tramp stamp (I think that is what it is called in English) but I would get rid of the rest.

 

[Mmushy]

Nice renders.
Like the contrast between the NC's bright family life and his nasty gritty inner self

 

[Kukipett]

Betisis

Please don't take offense to this, but this game feels like a complete bait and switch. Your F95 profile picture is of Claire, who is a young loli. The game load screen shows a pink background with half a dozen young lolis. But in the actual game you only interact with your middle aged wife, a gas station slut that looks even older than your wife, a motel junkie with a crackhead present, and a non-loli bitch that is completely covered in tats. What happened with the MC's daughters? What happened with all of the young female high school students? In the Prologue, your daughter Claire watched you as you fucked your wife, which was hot. That was taken out of the game with the promise that it would eventually be added again. Removing Claire's voyeurism made the kitchen scene boring, but I also do not understand why you made other parts of the kitchen blowjob scene worse too. In the Prologue, there was a much better BJ camera angle and animation. There were other lewd scenes with the other young daughters that were taken out as well. And after v0.1, v0.15, and v0.2, nothing even close to resembling those scenes has been added back into the game. The game feels so different now. It's like a completely different game. It's so serious, and all of the sex scenes that exist are boring and forgettable. Whenever someone recommends a loli game and mentions Buried Desires, I just want to facepalm or slap them in the face. Because this is not a loli game. And it isn't even close to being one even though the Prologue was as loli as they come. I don't like it when people are dishonest. And you couldn't even take two minutes out of the last 40 days to provide an honest explanation on why things have changed so drastically and what to expect in the future? You should just remove all the loli stuff. Remove the young loli daughters and female high school students from the game. Remove Claire as your F95 profile picture. Remove the lolis from the game's load screen. Remove the loli tag. And just start the game over for what it really is. A non-loli, pretentious, boring, and over-dramatic game that makes no sense and is no fun to play. So far, this game has only been about the most disgusting looking, trashy females that a person can find. Like ones you would find in an alley full of homeless people.

Maybe the dev was caught by his mom making loli porn and was forced to remove anything related and change the story for something less lewd and more dramatic.
Look mom !! i have only whores and gangsters now and i punched the stupid tatooed bitch to make her follow the right path to church as my MC's funeral is coming soon!
And you can see i have punished him also for beeing nasty and having sex with dirty whores, he's gonna die in a crappy hotel room and he's in pain right now, see mom the MC is just like Jesus he will die to clear all our dirty sexy sins!