VN Ren'Py Abandoned By Midsummer Moonlight [Ep. 2] [Mimir's Lab]

[SilentSevenStar]

Nice

 

[clowns234]

You're asking all the right questions! Most of the answers to your questions are already in the story, some of them just aren't spelled out explicitly. Others are set up to be answered later but the clues should be there for you to form an answer yourself. If the answers to some of those questions aren't obvious then maybe I'm doing a bad job.

For example:

Spoiler: Question/Answer

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In writing BMM, I chose to follow the "show, don't tell" rule where I tried to give you all the clues about what's going on, whether it's through facial expressions, images, or out of place dialogue and conversations between irrelevant characters. I tried to write BMM like a screenplay and not like a novel, in which every word, facial expression, and image is deliberate. If it's not worth saying then I cut it out. If somethings already obvious from what I'm showing, then I'm not going to spell it out for you by having a character directly comment on it. It's possible, and likely the case here, that I'm doing a bad job at showing what's going on. There's a lot of learning left to do on my side.

While I realize some people like things spelled out for them, some (like me) have fun following the clues. Make the game you want to make because so far, it's working, at least for me and many others.

 

[Simulacrum29]

An Harem-Incest-Game where nobody can stand anybody else from the cast and the mere thought of physical intimacy is nauseating to the main actors.

 

[w123t4]

First of all, I want to ask is this update the backup you had restored which developed before the accident? I remember something like you said reinstall the system make all the model and mod showed in a weird way. If yes then are you going to re-do all the things in the previous chapter in order to make a new chapter?
Anut Miranda looks great! But I guess she is not available just like the mom?
Why all people is like the Riddler? Can't they just only tell what they want instead of talking riddles? If not so then mc will not misunderstanding so many things.
The drama between audrey and mc in the closet is mind-blowing! How come mc don't know that there is a third person in the room since he was pushed from the back then fell into someone at the front?
Audrey's frightened facial expressions are so real! I glad mc is her first to take her virginity and cum in her but also sad that he doesn't know anything about that.
Moreover, I think there is a bug in that scene. The headphone should be already dropped after mc having sex with Audrey but when victoria call him he still wearing that headphone on his head. Also, victoria said that headphone should make complete silence but mc can stll hear victoria calling him from the back asking him to get out even he is still wearing it, a little bit not making sense since mc can hear victoria's voice from a distance but can't hear her dad and audrey's voice.
I like how the girls having their eye contact, they mark mc as their prey and fighting each other just like wild animals, victoria and junie definitely had some history before.
What kind of family shape what kind of man, no wonder mc is like this.
I wonder the casher is junie's dad, seems they know each other well.

Spoiler: image still have lines

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[d_pedestrian]

If i 'as a player' show some interest in a girl shouldn't MC show interest as well? I get it that MC don't like anyone at the start of this story but our choices should mold MC accordingly.

For example, If I took Junie to a romantic movie, It means I AM INTERESTED in her. Similarly If i decided to not pretend to not remember San, It means I like her. I am not asking MC to be all over these girls but maybe make him show some interest?

I understand that Hannah is MC's sister and he can't just accept her that way but he treated her as if he don't want her anywhere near him even after I chose she looked sexy.

I really like this game but please don't make MC so unlikable. He is undeservingly rude to girls. I rejected Victoria but still he acts as if he will drop his pants as soon as she asks him to.

 

[clowns234]

If i 'as a player' show some interest in a girl shouldn't MC show interest as well? I get it that MC don't like anyone at the start of this story but our choices should mold MC accordingly.

For example, If I took Junie to a romantic movie, It means I AM INTERESTED in her. Similarly If i decided to not pretend to not remember San, It means I like her. I am not asking MC to be all over these girls but maybe make him show some interest?

I understand that Hannah is MC's sister and he can't just accept her that way but he treated her as if he don't want her anywhere near him even after I chose she looked sexy.

I really like this game but please don't make MC so unlikable. He is undeservingly rude to girls. I rejected Victoria but still he acts as if he will drop his pants as soon as she asks him to.

My view: MC has built a big wall around himself (for valid reasons it would seem) and we will get to see that wall come down as the pieces of the puzzle start coming together.

 

[Dogorti]

If i 'as a player' show some interest in a girl shouldn't MC show interest as well? I get it that MC don't like anyone at the start of this story but our choices should mold MC accordingly.

For example, If I took Junie to a romantic movie, It means I AM INTERESTED in her. Similarly If i decided to not pretend to not remember San, It means I like her. I am not asking MC to be all over these girls but maybe make him show some interest?

I understand that Hannah is MC's sister and he can't just accept her that way but he treated her as if he don't want her anywhere near him even after I chose she looked sexy.

I really like this game but please don't make MC so unlikable. He is undeservingly rude to girls. I rejected Victoria but still he acts as if he will drop his pants as soon as she asks him to.

Geez, rarely do we have a mc with personality in this type of game and there are already people complaining... I'm interested in the mc and I'm interested in knowing more why it's like that (although we already have clues) the question is to wait and see

 

[NakedSingularity]

11 months for an update, started to think this was yet another .1 abandoned AVN.

 

[Professor Black]

For example:

Spoiler: Question/Answer

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Oh those totally flew over my head lol, that makes sense now, thanks. I like the show/dont tell kinda type of writing, but its sometimes frustrating I could miss some obvious cases just like these. Im used to being spoon fed with how the plot is going, this is polar opposite and its sure refreshing.

 

[clowns234]

You're asking all the right questions! Most of the answers to your questions are already in the story, some of them just aren't spelled out explicitly. Others are set up to be answered later but the clues should be there for you to form an answer yourself. If the answers to some of those questions aren't obvious then maybe I'm doing a bad job.

For example:

Spoiler: Question/Answer

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

In writing BMM, I chose to follow the "show, don't tell" rule where I tried to give you all the clues about what's going on, whether it's through facial expressions, images, or out of place dialogue and conversations between irrelevant characters. I tried to write BMM like a screenplay and not like a novel, in which every word, facial expression, and image is deliberate. If it's not worth saying then I cut it out. If somethings already obvious from what I'm showing, then I'm not going to spell it out for you by having a character directly comment on it. It's possible, and likely the case here, that I'm doing a bad job at showing what's going on. There's a lot of learning left to do on my side.

My theory:
The uncle knows he can't argue with the aunt directly about having MC go to his college with his sisters, but I'm guessing he knows that when the aunt finds out MC's idea of going it on his own means going to war, she will soon agree with the uncle and he will end up going to the school and not the military.
I also believe MC's depression is him knowing that, now that he is an adult, he can't rely on his sisters (or friends) any more and he has to be the man his dad wants him to be - which the most manly thing would be to go fight in the war.

 

[Jimskeleton]

My theory:
The uncle knows he can't argue with the aunt directly about having MC go to his college with his sisters, but I'm guessing he knows that when the aunt finds out MC's idea of going it on his own means going to war, she will soon agree with the uncle and he will end up going to the school and not the military.

This was pretty much my theory as well, especially when you consider it was the aunt that practically demanded that nobody tell MC the secret, all be it completely unintentional her saying that is the reason he is ending up going to war, with an aid from the uncle telling him to turn on the TV when he got home.

 

[Deleted member 4937290]

There's a bit of improving to do, for example some transitions feel awkward. Either way, the game is something you wouldn't find on this site. Porn games tend to introduce "tsundere" characters that fall for you in about three scenes. That's why I advise you not to rush things. You are treating complicate matters and the atmosphere was well built. You don't have to "break" this dooming/depressing feeling, you have to evaporate it bit by bit, this way it will feel natural when the characters break through their problems and fights. Of course a cathartic moment is needed, but again, there is a lot of build up to make here.

Another thing I would recommend is that you don't use the girls like livestock, that's something almost every game does, even the best ones, because they cannot escape from the banalization of feminity that comes from the fact that their purpose is the sexual pleasure for the male audience. Not only they should be opposed to sharing, they should oppose you in a hell lot of decisions. Make it ugly and worth it at the same time. Try that the mc isn't the center of attention all the time, life is not so easy that you can have a group of girls drooling for you and they are okay with it. If you want that end, there should be a lot of fight in between, and it shouldn't be a fight for the man all the time, but for themselves and for other people they care about. You got the perfect vn to pull it off.

Some input about the characters, not saying it is good or bad, just my impression so you have a major view of how some people may react to your story.
1. I hate Miranda. For some reason she thinks making mc's life miserable is worh it because it's a lesson of some sort. Talking from experience, this kind of lessons are crap. If you can stop someone's life going to shit, you do it. The lesson should come from a direct teaching, not from ignoring the issue and putting the blame on the victim.
2. I feel bad about Junie. I know MC just wants to have a good friend, but he is being kind of an ass. If he doesn't like her, he should tell her. If he doesn't reject her he's just extending a relationship where Junie is obviously expecting an ending MC can't give her (at least from the present point of view). Maybe I'm lacking the full picture, time will tell.
3. Both parents are crap. Any try to sympathize with them is useless, at this point they have no redemption. It doesn't feel right when they talk "honestly" like they have accepted their situation and that's about it. The sisters are being insensible when they just let all that shit happen, and then they talk with MC like nothing's wrong. Like they are not part of the issue. The house has some deep problems and I hope they are addressed because oh boy there's a lot of hypocrisy in there.
4. What the fuck is wrong with Victoria? If the situation was different, the scene would have ended terribly. Both siblings scarred for life. Then the cunt tries to put an excuse because "she wasn't feeling well". Feeling too much bad vibes about her, Audrey shouldn't forgive her, she did something too fucked up. Horrible friend.


That's the opinion I can give you as a player, hope it helps. The game surprised me and I may support you when I get a clearer view of what you are planning here. Best of lucks.

 

[clowns234]

Just curious. How many are playing the incest version vs the Dev's original version? I've played both and I think it makes a difference on how the characters are seen.

 

[Deleted member 4937290]

Just curious. How many are playing the incest version vs the Dev's original version? I've played both and I think it makes a difference on how the characters are seen.

Mh, I thought it was the "true" version, since a lot of devs tend to pull the "stepsis" crap in order to be "legal" on patreon. I mean, they do it in a way that people can mod it easily to incest, must be for a reason.

 

[Dogorti]

Just curious. How many are playing the incest version vs the Dev's original version? I've played both and I think it makes a difference on how the characters are seen.

obviously the incest version, I also played the vanilla version but it just doesn't feel the same, plus I think the dramatic weight of the incest version is much better

and also I think we all know which is the original version that the dev has in his head, regardless of what he says or doesn't say, we all know how patreon works so I don't blame him

 

[clowns234]

Mh, I thought it was the "true" version, since a lot of devs tend to pull the "stepsis" crap in order to be "legal" on patreon. I mean, they do it in a way that people can mod it easily to incest, must be for a reason.

obviously the incest version, I also played the vanilla version but it just doesn't feel the same, plus I think the dramatic weight of the incest version is much better

and also I think we all know which is the original version that the dev has in his head, regardless of what he says or doesn't say, we all know how patreon works so I don't blame him

That's what I thought also, but if that is the case, the dev went to a lot of trouble to separate the two - more so than any other dev I have seen.
There is new code to go along with all the new dialog.

 

[TheAshina]

This update just reminded me why there was so many positive reviews just from update 0.1, this game might have the single best written dialogues and character interactions I have ever seen on this site. Reading it really do gives me pleasure but I have one critisim.
I do feel like amount of choices and the weight of them are too much, even the choice that added to ending of the ep 1 changes a lot and I almost skipped it, I know many people actually love having choices that "matter" but I kinda dislike it for 2 reasons,
1 - with more content it gets harder for developer to put new updates together in the future, continuing the each plot slightly different for each choice is pretty tiring and takes long time, I would imagine. Also intented or not, I think authors will always have a favorite path on their head and will give their main focus on that, which is unavoidable honestly.
2 - subtle choices that have overlasting effects makes it impossible to foresee the actual choices you make, so if you are like me you will be trying to figure what each choice actually means by trying them one by one to see the actual difference between them, especially if each choice have some unique consequences. Save and load gets tiresome after some time lol.
Anyway, After the long wait and trying other mediocre games, reading this game feels like eating some gourmet shit. Audrey still my fav, can't wait to see how romance will take shape with her.

4. What the fuck is wrong with Victoria? If the situation was different, the scene would have ended terribly. Both siblings scarred for life. Then the cunt tries to put an excuse because "she wasn't feeling well". Feeling too much bad vibes about her, Audrey shouldn't forgive her, she did something too fucked up. Horrible friend.

By the way I agree on you about, Audrey forgave Victoria way too fast in the bedroom scene, she straight up gaslighted her and Audrey fell for it. But it's understandable since, Audrey kinda naive y'know.

 

[Dogorti]

That's what I thought also, but if that is the case, the dev went to a lot of trouble to separate the two - more so than any other dev I have seen.
There is new code to go along with all the new dialog.

the dev of a family venture also has two very different versions: the one on patreon and the one on subscribestar, I think it's a good thing for those who don't like wincest

 

[david makai]

By the way I agree on you about, Audrey forgave Victoria way too fast in the bedroom scene, she straight up gaslighted her and Audrey fell for it. But it's understandable since, Audrey kinda naive y'know.

We're not actually far into the story yet so there's really no telling how this will play out in the future - it's why I don't really like to review or give opinions very early in beyond "this has my interest" because there's a lot of time to see questions hopefully get answered

 

[darkjoker13]

Just finish the normal version, i don't mine about incest
should i play it? is incest is original vision of the dev?