@Tabu9000
@JoeSteel I go back to my original question of what kind of game do you want to see? I agree that there are plenty of games out there about humiliation. I do think my game has some new and unique scenes and ideas. Like Hydra said it's the fact that Devin hasn't given up, and wont. That's probably the thing that makes Devin's Life different then many of the others.
What games do you like the most? Do you know why?
You ask a fair question and I will do my best to give a fair answer.
I like games where the MC has choices, and has to resolve a conflict within themselves. William Faulkner wrote that “The only thing worth writing about is the human heart in conflict with itself.” I think that that applies to games of this type as well.
Now, you have bravely decided that Devin won't be broken or corrupted - that she will remain herself. I say "brave" because that means you have to have a mechanism to force her to be embarrassed beyond the usual suspects: hypnotism, magic, a secret desire to be a slut, etc. You have to have an external mechanism that forces her to take actions that lead to "the hot stuff" but don't change her internally. In theory, this is outstanding. In practice, it is hard... really hard... unless you just make her vapid and unable to unable to predict the consequences of her actions and decisions.
My concern is that you have ended up doing the latter. There is no way Devin, as presented, would stick around in a strip club once she realized what it was. There is no way she would perform bottomless as a cheerleader in front of the whole town. Unless she is just dumb, and cannot predict that kicking her legs up while wearing a short skirt and no underwear will result in her flashing the crowd.
Now, the principal stuff is good. She has a reason to fear his disapproval and obet his orders. She is in conflict with herself – she wants to keep him from firing her, but fears the consequences of following his rules. That’s an extrinsic motivation: she wants one thing, but is forced by outside forces to do another.
That’s lacking in much of the game. She does things with predictably negative consequences without any real motive to do so, like stripping in front of Henry or sitting in the “massage chair” or getting a massage from her students or staying in the strip club.
You’ve set a high bar for yourself, and I admire that. Most game designers won’t try. But there’s a reason they won’t try: because it is really hard. As others have mentioned, the game Agent Alona: The Japan Mission tries to do what you are attempting. It was hard for that author, but at least he had cultural differences to fall back on. I couldn’t do what you are attempting, for sure.
So, my overall impression is that suspension of disbelief isn’t really possible in your game, for me. Others obviously feel differently, so you should concentrate on satisfying them and not me. It isn’t like I don’t like your game, overall. You have lots of hot scenes and even if I groan a bit it’s not likely that I will pass up updates to the game.
As for the games I like, I’d highlight Valiant Warrior Astrid. Though she’s being corrupted, she thinks it’s in a good cause: that Don is actually helping her. I can suspend my disbelief because she thinks she is paying a price that is worth it (the restoration of her warrior skills).
My advice is that you shouldn’t over think my criticisms. I am honestly just trying to be helpful, and recognize that I am not your target audience. I want to reiterate that I admire your bravery in trying to do something different.
