VN Ren'Py Abandoned Evermore [v0.5.1] [Prometheus]

[Rolo]

Discovered this gem only yesterday.
One of my most favorite now. Congrats.
Thrilling story, best graphics, most beautiful girls.

Melanie would be my favorite girl in the net – if she would not have a severe defect:
Was it really necessary for her to have pierced nipples? (Sad!)

Edit: I mean Its not sexy, its just pain for the viewer (personal opinion )

 

[PrometheusEVN]

again, this was only an opinion and I understand how some game developers can have trouble with limited hardware. all in all though, thanks for taking my opinion in stride and giving me a solid answer instead of telling me off like some other developers have. good luck moving forward

No problem! And don't worry I won't take it personally, I try to look at everyone's opinion about the game because some people may say or notice things that I hadn't realized. Of course not every opinion will be valid (Ex: "Melanie needs tentacle pubes for the game to be good") but if I don't at least look at what people are saying then I'll be stuck in my own bubble and never improve. And no problem! I also like when game devs take the time to actually answer questions so I try to be like that too.

 

[LGM]

Great start. Reminds me a lot of one of my favorite games here, Once in a Lifetime.

I have just two issues with it, and I suspect one of them is just a problem with my hardware. That being, some animations, specifically the two with Melanie at school, have an awful lot of flickering. Though looking at them outside the game is perfectly fine... Like I said, probably my problem. Just thought I'd mention it.
The other issue is the general lack of punctuation. Every line should have some at the end. Also, the word 'Ya' some of the characters, especially the MC, seem so fond of, needs a comma behind it most of the time. Oh, and I wasn't sure, so I looked it up, but 'ya' is almost certainly not a word. I looked up synonyms for yes, and found yeah, yea, yup, yah, and many others, but not ya. But I suspect nobody cares but me, so feel free to write me off as overly pedantic. Not about the punctuation, though. Punctuation is important.

Also, I just remembered noticing a few lines where the word 'I' seemed to be missing...

Anyway, like I said, this is awesome, so I'm looking forward to more.

 

[HogRocket]

"Melanie needs tentacle pubes for the game to be good"

Ok, THAT was a mental image I did NOT need!

 

[Tinuss]

Can someone help me out, it looks like I am missing 2 scenes and I dont quite know how to get them.

Spoiler

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[Jimskeleton]

Can someone help me out, it looks like I am missing 2 scenes and I dont quite know how to get them.

Spoiler

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Both are scenes with Melanie, one at the top happens in the locker room, and if I remember correctly the bottom one happens in her bedroom.

 

[depp123]

Can someone help me out, it looks like I am missing 2 scenes and I dont quite know how to get them.

Spoiler

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After a scene in the cafeteria you have the option to go spy on girls in the locker rooms, because they are changing into swimsuits. If you do that you then have the option to go look for Melanie because she is in the same class. Then choose "Try it" and you'll get it. The second one then happens in her room unless you decline.

 

[MrHatIsHere]

This game is pretty good so far, but it could use something in the UI that lets the player see the number of points for each potential love interest.

 

[Tinuss]

After a scene in the cafeteria you have the option to go spy on girls in the locker rooms, because they are changing into swimsuits. If you do that you then have the option to go look for Melanie because she is in the same class. Then choose "Try it" and you'll get it. The second one then happens in her room unless you decline.

Odd, must've not had enough points to unlock it. I definitely remember looking for Melanie in the changing rooms. Will give it another go.
Thanks for the detailed explanation

 

[PrometheusEVN]

This game is pretty good so far, but it could use something in the UI that lets the player see the number of points for each potential love interest.

That's something I'd definitely like to do in an upcoming update

 

[Kpopn00dcoverlover]

Spoiler: holy fucking shit i'm in love

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the first 0.1 i've tried in a long time that was not a disappointment. and after this update i'm all on board. drew me in with the gorgeous girls and now i'm here for the ride.


hot. damn.

 

[phupdup]

While running game code:
  File "game/script2.rpy", line 1452, in script
    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
  File "game/script2.rpy", line 1452, in <module>
    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
NameError: name 'Melanie_Fondle' is not defined

Hey dev....

You work with variables by defining them on the fly in your script, and this can come back to bite you in the ass as we see here. Yeah I decompile everything when devs remove the source from me because of the old adage "trust no-one".

Evermore-0.2-pc/game $ find . -name "*.rpy" -exec grep -iH "melanie_fondle" {} \;
./script2.rpy:    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
./m_events.rpy:    $ Melanie_Fondle = False
./m_events.rpy:                        $ Melanie_Fondle = True

Looking at your m_events.rpy you have the False definition there behind a label called Pool_Changing. It gets set to True in a menu option about 40 lines later. It would appear I never got to this scene before tripping over the check in yet another script file.

Do yourself a favor and define your logicals and other variables with default values at the very top of your script.rpy (the top, not behind the start: label as the Shy Girl dev had to be reminded). You make the same mistake here too with:

label start:
    $ Emily_path = True
    $ Natalie_path = True
    $ Melanie_path = True
    $ Jessie_path = True
    $ Chloe_path = True
    $ Aria_path = True
    $ Tamia_path = True
    $ perv = 0

The problem with this is if you add a variable in a future version behind the start: label, it only gets defined on a new game. Putting it up with your character defines here like what you did with persistent.p

define flash = Fade(.25, 0.0, .75, color="#fff")

define e = Character("Emily", color="#57feff")
define m = Character("Melanie", color="#191970")
define j = Character("Jessie", color="#ff0000")
define n = Character("Natalie", color= "#990012")
define c = Character("Chloe", color = "#c48189")
define a = Character("Aria", color = "#f5ad42")
define t = Character("Tamia", color = "#a83279")
define mf = Character("Mr. Fickles")
define b = Character("Boss")
define Man = Character("Man")
define g = Character("Girl")
define u = Character("Urdi", color = "#ff69b4")
define v = Character("Verdandi", color = "#8b3a3a")
define s = Character("Skuld", color = "#8470ff")
define h = Character("Harpo", color = "#fcc203")
define myst = Character("Stripper", color = "#fc0367")
define cam = Character("Camilla", color = "#fc0367")
$ persistant.p = p

causes it to be at least defined with a default value even when the user goes with a load from an older version. So I hope to see your script.rpy (when I decompile it again as I'm sure I'll be forced to) in the future looking like:

define flash = Fade(.25, 0.0, .75, color="#fff")

define e = Character("Emily", color="#57feff")
define m = Character("Melanie", color="#191970")
define j = Character("Jessie", color="#ff0000")
define n = Character("Natalie", color= "#990012")
define c = Character("Chloe", color = "#c48189")
define a = Character("Aria", color = "#f5ad42")
define t = Character("Tamia", color = "#a83279")
define mf = Character("Mr. Fickles")
define b = Character("Boss")
define Man = Character("Man")
define g = Character("Girl")
define u = Character("Urdi", color = "#ff69b4")
define v = Character("Verdandi", color = "#8b3a3a")
define s = Character("Skuld", color = "#8470ff")
define h = Character("Harpo", color = "#fcc203")
define myst = Character("Stripper", color = "#fc0367")
define cam = Character("Camilla", color = "#fc0367")
$ persistant.p = p
$ Emily_path = True
$ Natalie_path = True
$ Melanie_path = True
$ Jessie_path = True
$ Chloe_path = True
$ Aria_path = True
$ Tamia_path = True
$ perv = 0
$ Melanie_Fondle = False

 

[runz]

captain america

 

[PrometheusEVN]

While running game code:
  File "game/script2.rpy", line 1452, in script
    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
  File "game/script2.rpy", line 1452, in <module>
    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
NameError: name 'Melanie_Fondle' is not defined

Hey dev....

You work with variables by defining them on the fly in your script, and this can come back to bite you in the ass as we see here. Yeah I decompile everything when devs remove the source from me because of the old adage "trust no-one".

Evermore-0.2-pc/game $ find . -name "*.rpy" -exec grep -iH "melanie_fondle" {} \;
./script2.rpy:    if Melanie_Fondle == True:
./m_events.rpy:    $ Melanie_Fondle = False
./m_events.rpy:                        $ Melanie_Fondle = True

Looking at your m_events.rpy you have the False definition there behind a label called Pool_Changing. It gets set to True in a menu option about 40 lines later. It would appear I never got to this scene before tripping over the check in yet another script file.

Do yourself a favor and define your logicals and other variables with default values at the very top of your script.rpy (the top, not behind the start: label as the Shy Girl dev had to be reminded). You make the same mistake here too with:

label start:
    $ Emily_path = True
    $ Natalie_path = True
    $ Melanie_path = True
    $ Jessie_path = True
    $ Chloe_path = True
    $ Aria_path = True
    $ Tamia_path = True
    $ perv = 0

The problem with this is if you add a variable in a future version behind the start: label, it only gets defined on a new game. Putting it up with your character defines here like what you did with persistent.p

define flash = Fade(.25, 0.0, .75, color="#fff")

define e = Character("Emily", color="#57feff")
define m = Character("Melanie", color="#191970")
define j = Character("Jessie", color="#ff0000")
define n = Character("Natalie", color= "#990012")
define c = Character("Chloe", color = "#c48189")
define a = Character("Aria", color = "#f5ad42")
define t = Character("Tamia", color = "#a83279")
define mf = Character("Mr. Fickles")
define b = Character("Boss")
define Man = Character("Man")
define g = Character("Girl")
define u = Character("Urdi", color = "#ff69b4")
define v = Character("Verdandi", color = "#8b3a3a")
define s = Character("Skuld", color = "#8470ff")
define h = Character("Harpo", color = "#fcc203")
define myst = Character("Stripper", color = "#fc0367")
define cam = Character("Camilla", color = "#fc0367")
$ persistant.p = p

causes it to be at least defined with a default value even when the user goes with a load from an older version. So I hope to see your script.rpy (when I decompile it again as I'm sure I'll be forced to) in the future looking like:

define flash = Fade(.25, 0.0, .75, color="#fff")

define e = Character("Emily", color="#57feff")
define m = Character("Melanie", color="#191970")
define j = Character("Jessie", color="#ff0000")
define n = Character("Natalie", color= "#990012")
define c = Character("Chloe", color = "#c48189")
define a = Character("Aria", color = "#f5ad42")
define t = Character("Tamia", color = "#a83279")
define mf = Character("Mr. Fickles")
define b = Character("Boss")
define Man = Character("Man")
define g = Character("Girl")
define u = Character("Urdi", color = "#ff69b4")
define v = Character("Verdandi", color = "#8b3a3a")
define s = Character("Skuld", color = "#8470ff")
define h = Character("Harpo", color = "#fcc203")
define myst = Character("Stripper", color = "#fc0367")
define cam = Character("Camilla", color = "#fc0367")
$ persistant.p = p
$ Emily_path = True
$ Natalie_path = True
$ Melanie_path = True
$ Jessie_path = True
$ Chloe_path = True
$ Aria_path = True
$ Tamia_path = True
$ perv = 0
$ Melanie_Fondle = False

Thank you for the programming help, I'll be honest this is the first time I work on such a large project, I've programmed before but nothing this big so I'm kind of learning on the fly. The variables is something I've been looking to change for 0.3 for sure but you also pointed out a few things that I hadn't picked up on so thank you!

 

[PrometheusEVN]

Spoiler: holy fucking shit i'm in love

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the first 0.1 i've tried in a long time that was not a disappointment. and after this update i'm all on board. drew me in with the gorgeous girls and now i'm here for the ride.


hot. damn.

Thank you! (And sorry you got the bug where the heart doesn't fade like it should, I'll be reworking the affection system in 0.3 so this doesn't happen anymore)

 

[punisher2099]

So far, this is looking really good. You got yourself a new patron.

 

[PrometheusEVN]

So far, this is looking really good. You got yourself a new patron.

Thank you!

 

[Voez1999]

So I have a question, will there be a possibility of sharing?
let me clarify: "sharing" = "if I can date multiple people so can you"(this can be just a character decision and not shown if you intend to make every other character that isn't a LI and a-hole)
ntr = random person, normally a not really likable one, takes away your partner and/or your partner cheats on you
I don't like using "sharing" but it is easier for people to understand on this site.

sharing is still a form of ntr a.k.a. netorase.. and just to correct you, ntr does not only apply to random characters who have no significance to the story. It could very well be your neighbor, bestfriend who betrayed or even a part of your family i.e. brother, father, stepfather etc.. im not judging ur kink or the stuff you're into, just correcting some stuff you have said

 

[TundraLupus]

sharing is still a form of ntr a.k.a. netorase.. and just to correct you, ntr does not only apply to random characters who have no significance to the story. It could very well be your neighbor, bestfriend who betrayed or even a part of your family i.e. brother, father, stepfather etc.. im not judging ur kink or the stuff you're into, just correcting some stuff you have said

oh yeah I didn't mean "random" on a literal sense, but I see why it could be confusing.
edit: thanks for the extra info about ntr, I was mostly talking about the way it is treated on this types of games but I probably could have specified it better.

 

[midway_02]

ggdrive, yes i like it