Explain then how to avoid this particular scene with all apprentice's dead beside the 2 MC's with how the trial is made up with 2 choice's, fight shadows to 0 left and run to demon after or go to demon 1 then fight all shadows and yet both lead to same result oh wait thats not possible to avoid it sorry!
The worst part of this writing story x gameplay here well is there is no explanation as to WHY only the brother and sister can see each other and not the rest and why they die with the choice of 2 what player can do, 1 go in on the ritual shit and slay all shadows/apprentice's first then go to demon or go to demon it dissapears, and last shadow is demon. So yeah i rate this 3 as i said and id doubt you can achieve better than that on story parts if this isn even chapter 1.
I can think of 5 different way's to make this part better in an instant today and ill just give you 4 here because i can.
Option 1. Its really the Worst yet easiest way to improve upon story, simply remove the 2 option of even finding the demon before killing all the shadows and shadows can still be apprentice's. And have mc's been told on wake up that bonds of love or family or only family (idc really) allowed the mc's to avoid the illusion of demon between each other no need for anything extra simple and 5-20% better.
Option 2. Less worse but not much better, simply let the shadows be shadow mirror of the demon and allow all apprentice's to live, remove the scene and have a happy ending on that part.
Option 3. The 2 mc's can confront demon and x shadows left=how many apprentice's that survives. basicly if all shadows are left, all apprentice's survives.
4, mc's players can save apprentice's by killing the shadows holding them hostage. and some of the apprentice's can join the fight vs the demon who can grow stronger getting his shadows back and giving more exp ect to player/mc's. Heck you can even make the shadows have different colors and allow certain shadows to be only male/females. thereby another (reward) can be given to mc/mc's also by saving the apprentice's. id give this onea twice uppgrade in story and would already rate the game a 7-8 by this.
Now, i have given you basic uppgrade on story and the mechanics ect and 4 option would make prologue about 50% better atleast.
Since not only would it give the mc's and player/players reason/reasons to kill the shadows but also give them the choice not to. making it much more fun to play, allowing players to choose if they want easy or hard gameplay increase their liking of the game no matter game type its simple logic nothing advanced.