Wake up Phat!
Facepalm away bro! I enjoy triggering the emotionally frail!
It was good getting some family time. Being out shot by my grandsons was humbling though.
My daughter and son-in-law have 120 acres 2-1/2 hours south of where I live. When Hank sang "A country boy can survive.", he was singing about them.
Of course, there are plenty of capable women that would be kickass (literally) bouncers. There used to be a leather dyke bar in the city that had a bouncer with bigger guns (biceps) than I had at the time.
12 gauge all the way baby! It didn't help that the following morning we shot our scary black guns for a couple of hours. (5.56, 7.62 x 39, 7.62 x 51)