I humbly offer you two pieces of advice:
1) If you're not sure about something so serious, go find help. See a professional and get treatment if you really need it. Those feelings you described are preventing you from advancing in your life and I take it that you are really young. Lots of good stuff are in store for you but take the bull by the horns first.
2) Don't believe everything he says. Most of the things we write here are said tongue in cheek, and of course we don't intend to offend people with mental issues, or other devs who have said to be sick. Similarly, some devs have lost loved ones and people have been understanding when they went missing for some months. The thing is that we don't believe Icstor's issues any more. He is making A LOT of money. A LOT. And I mean A LOT. Far more than devs with insultingly better games. He makes every month more than a person in my country would make in a whole year earning an average salary, and I live in western Europe.
If you have similar problems in real life, you normally stop working and get welfare benefits (if you are in a civilized country) until you have recovered but you don't stay in bed demanding that your clients/customers still pay you every month for doing nothing. Yes, Icstor's patrons are his costumers because they pay him to develop a game and only those who pay (in theory) have access to this product. It is different from when you are an artist, a youtuber, a social polemicist, and ask for support to keep on doing what you do but your content is accesible to everyone. In that case people who freely financially support you are a "patron of the arts". But with regard to Icstor, that's not the case. He offered a product for those who pay him, he made promises that he never kept (fully animated scenes when...?) and he keeps stringing along a solid fanbase clouded by that magical word, incest.
The game is increasingly bad. The last update was absolute shit compared to the previous ones and to some other games on this site.