I seem to be doing something wrong, how do you actually play this? the in game guide doesnt seem to help much?
Okay, so you're a big manly orc and you're new to massage business. Here is a quick overview:
The best part of your job, is getting to grope pretty girls everywhere. Goblin calls them "VIP customers", and takes all the money they pay (presumably, a lot of it). The objective is to completely satisfy them, and then, presumably, they'll reward you with sexual favors. When you want to start massaging them, click on your phone. It's a landline phone, but somehow it can get SMS messages. You don't have to think about the content of their calls - they always want to come immediately and be groped by an orc.
When they come, click them to make small talk (well, they're going to make small talk, you're a mime), and click the massage bed to start massaging.
First, make a treatment plan. At first, that's a plan of just one part, with only one option of full-body massage. Things will get more complicated later.
In full-body massage, try to get every point on her body into a green heart. Just select a point that needs massaging, select a mode and press space - massage will continue until one point is a green heart. If you've overdone it, third mode fixes your mistakes. If you have trouble taking a good look, right mouse button moves the view, and mouse wheel zooms in and out.
In limb massage, try to find a sore spot and massage it to health. Then find another one. And one more. You'll know you did well when the three hearts on the bottom-right are filled.
There might be other modes I haven't seen yet.
You probably wouldn't be able to fully satisfy them on your first try. That is fine. It just means you need more training. Training is simple enough - you just need to click on your tiny notebook (above the phone), and browse for the upgrade you want. Once you buy it, delivery is instant, and your orc instincts will kick in, making you train to new heights of manliness.
The problem is, training equipment costs money (as it should in capitalism), and the goblin takes all the VIP customers' money for himself. You gotta take regular customers. Just click on the door, and they'll come rushing in.
I haven't figured how to be good at that minigame. But it's all about clicking or not clicking the mouse according to what they tell you. Don't worry - even if you just stand there like a statue, customers will still pay you. But satisfied customers pay more. And since time is purely cosmetic and your only expense is training equipment, you can take your time.
Well, this is the gameplay loop. Make money - train - satisfy VIPs. This should get you started, feel free to explore. There might be things I'm missing.