- Aug 22, 2018
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She has follow me on her tits .... sure, what could possibly go wrong.
1) Damn missed that. I'll try to be more careful.Couple little things, I'll add more as I play.
1.) Within the 1st couple lines you switch from first to third person. "You vs I" Pick a perspective and keep with it.
2.) Capitalize names always, even if it's just "mc"
3.) Intro movie is cool but its on a loop so it keeps kicking you back to the travelling down the tunnel shot until you mouse click next.
4.) You might want to include an ACTUAL intro screen welcoming the player to the novel, the drop from clicking "start" to "Bronx, 2037" is a bit jarring.
5.) I really like the info dump about the world and that you can skip it. I LOVE lore and alternate history so I ate that shit up.
6.) LOVE the Underland club, the White Rabbit character is great even if I personally dislike her hair. Im in love with the Queen of hearts.
7.) The transition music needs to slowly taper off, the switch from the choice between the two girls where the music just cuts is jarring.
I personally think it's worth the risk to find out...but I dig her rabbit holes...She has follow me on her tits .... sure, what could possibly go wrong.
Lol nope, no plans for that. Maybe a cybernetic eye or hand but that's about it.Cyberpunk eh? Here's hoping none of the lovely ladies has any enhancements...
1) Damn missed that. I'll try to be more careful.
2) The mc name gets changed right away to your choosing. But good point it looks off at the beginning.
3) I thought the loop was good since it starts abruptly and the viewer may want to see it again. Do you think I should remove the loop?
4) Okay I'll take a look at that.
5) Thanks! I wrote a much more detailed data dump for a Cyberpunk rpg game I ran. I originally had it all in there but my beta testers all complained. So it got significantly shortened.
6) Hahaha awesome. That hair is dForce and annoying as hell to work with so she may be going to the salon...Same with Ali...
7) I faded the intro music in since it was incredibly jarring. I'm not sure if I can fade music out though since it only stops when you click...
Nice... 10/10 Points! Very detalied! XDOverview: A story and character-driven Cyberpunk themed visual novel.
I appreciate your thorough feedback!Sorry I wanted to just update one post with my thoughts so I didn't just span your thread. Overally I really like what you've got going so far. Needs some polish but you're on the right track. I like Ali's hair and look it was just Bunny's that threw me a bit. LOVE the overall character look on here otherwise.
As to the music, no idea if you can have it fade out, but something to look into.
Bear in mind, these are all just my personal impressions and what I would do to tighten things up a bit and isnt worth more then any other random player so please take what I say with a grain of salt and make up your own mind about each issue.
Like I said, so far, so good though.
In my future history he wins the election so he should be happy with me . But I guess it is safer to use fake names even if people can guess who you mean.Well, i don't think Salvini will ever come to bother you, but why to take useless risks?
So you're one of those that screams "NTR!" when you don't get all the girls?I like the cyberpunk theme and BDSM elements but i'm needing more tags to see if i'm interested.
Is this male or female protagonist.
If its male protagonist, can you get all the women ala harem?
If you can get all the women, can you avoid the Prostitution part? Because last think I want is to pimp out my character's love interests. MINE! No one else's.
Renders look good though!
Especially that redhead with the lace covered thighs.... Mhm yes sir, give me a good girl in stockings any day of the week.
I know I scream ntr when other men besides my mc get my girls.So you're one of those that screams "NTR!" when you don't get all the girls?
The MC's past will catch up soon enough. There was only so much story and background I could pack into this release. There won't be sandbox or rpg elements. It's not that kind of game. I'm happy you enjoyed it and you can look forward to the continuation coming soon.I just played through it, and bookmarked it as soon as it was done. The story is refreshing, though it would be nice to have a bit more on the MC since at this point, you have no idea what is going on for about 10 years. I get that it may be you want to dribble it out over the course of the game, but it would help to know what kind of person we are playing. The girls having different personalities are key to any VN that wants to have a bit of choice to them, and you've set that up well. One request, for the love of all that is holy stick to the novel style and don't randomly add in sandbox or rpg elements, those two tags alone make me drop these games fast, since if I want an RPG I will play some of the older rpg games I own, and if I want a sandbox, I will just play Fallout 4 since it's already a never ending grind.
I did originally have the option for neither girl but when I realized the only sex scenes in the release would be those two I took it out to avoid people missing out completely. However, I will add it back in as the story expands. My goal is to have as much choice as possible (particularly with girls) while still telling the story.Is this going to be one of those forced "mc have them all" harem games or we will have choices to choose which girls we want to purse and which we want to avoid (in sexual terms)?
Since, unfortunately, there is no option to choose none of the hookers... I'm not optimistic, but let's ask anyway... maybe it's just one time thing.