Do you have any guesses as to why Ayua isn't an LI?Having said that my favourite girls aren't even LI's: Maja, Ayua (I think she's central to the story, but not an LI, unless Ocean changes his mind), Robin, Layla, mysterious redhead, goth girl.
I never said he was. The "professional writer" comment was so everyone else would know I know what I'm talking about. It's not just another fan rant. It's me breaking down what he did and how he could improve, especially since he's not the only developer who doesn't speak English primarily. "Get a grip Fortuna." Excuse me? Lol, I'll do what I want on this public forum. I'm generally not here, but what little I've seen of your posts I liked. So, in good faith, I'll say this. If anyone needs to get a grip, it's you. Cheers, luvღ
Don't worry, we'll have to wait and see if Ocean changes his mind. After all, Ocean is a man who sticks to his ideas and never changes them. No sir he is not known for reworking his ideas until they meet his standards..I mean it's part of their identity right?
- 'aka I'm a token LI because I'm not Nami or Bella'
- 'aka I'm a token LI because there's not enough content for a glass half full'
- 'aka I'm a token LI because the game needs options'
Having said that my favourite girls aren't even LI's: Maja, Ayua (I think she's central to the story, but not an LI, unless Ocean changes his mind), Robin, Layla, mysterious redhead, goth girl.
Some people especulate the MC and Ayua are William's children, but different mothers.
Because Ocean maybe has another plan for her. For example, I highly doubt Katie will be lewdable in SG, because she's lewdable in WiaB: her story's been told. It might be that Ocean has Ayua for canon purposes and doesn't want to mess up the canon if people cry about 'why can't I x or y or z with Ayua?' That already happens, imagine how much more it would if she was central to the overall plot at some point.
...which won't stop Ocean, as people speculate about Nika and Nami.
I'm outta reacts, we can but hopeDon't worry, we'll have to wait and see if Ocean changes his mind. After all, Ocean is a man who sticks to his ideas and never changes them. No sir he is not known for reworking his ideas until they meet his standards..
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Another point where I would have liked to jump into the Dev's face with my bare ass.
I don't think anyone has a problem with constructive criticism, it's just those blind rage rants that get tiresome. So I am looking forward to it.
Oh we'll find out 100% I am sure. Too many characters notice the earring, talk about the earring... we have Vanessa ask about it, saying it's familiar, we have Katie showing an interesting in Nami (if you consider that Nika only came to the bookclub in the last moment), we have Sasha wearing one and starting to ask Nami, we have goth girl appearing to look at it twice...
PS: one question, do you know when Nami's parents died and how?Oh we'll find out 100% I am sure. Too many characters notice the earring, talk about the earring... we have Vanessa ask about it, saying it's familiar, we have Katie showing an interesting in Nami (if you consider that Nika only came to the bookclub in the last moment), we have Sasha wearing one and starting to ask Nami, we have goth girl appearing to look at it twice...
I'd be surprised if we don't find out the story of the earrings. It is more fleshed out as a plot device and with more dialogue than half the LI's
As for Ayua, there are some obvious hints, such as she is an Asian girl with the last name Zane, she runs a martial arts studio like Miru, the girlfriend of the WiAB MC, she can't hold her liquor just like Miru and according to her words she got this from her mom.
Good review, although I wouldn't call it brutal, it's more like constructive criticism.
So I've done one, but, I had to do the quadrant differently - evil is always the left hand path in literature/esoterics after all (sinister), good is the right hand path, and lawful is always taking the high ground, while chaos is base level entropy. So my apologies that it's not the same co-ordinates, but it's an important distinction to me.
d "(My parents died when I was three.)"
Completely fair. I won't comment on specifics about what you've written as you're leaving and you aren't after a dialogue, but I've always valued your contributions to the discussion. I hope you find time for all the things in your life!
loved reading that as someone that only understands English but fails to tell the difference between good and bad writing I enjoyed this review. The only thing I personally disagree with but this is more personal preference. I always loved the usage of words like wormy and bibi even if it might be overused. As to me it makes them feel more like siblings that has certain words only they would understand. But im no writer so probably a bad thing using it to much and liek I said just personal preference that I like it even if it's over used. Again thanks for the review I did enjoy the read.
sorry Fortuna, but even I as a non-English speaker know that this sentence is nonsense.
If that happened around the same time as Nika's parents died, you already know what I'm getting at.
I have to agree with you in 100, 200, 500 or whatever %, Fortuna ღ's review is a constructive criticism, and a good one. In contrast to those who whine endlessly, and can only sweat out everything is wrong, everything is rubbish, everything is shit.
