Right now the story starts off quite interesting but then it quickly turns into a placeholder for sex scenes. The sex scenes are looking good even if the content seems a little dull. The characters look natural although the MC's facial hair and haircut are rather off-putting (for me at least). I strongly suggest that you invest more time into developing your characters because right now they feel unidimensional, stereotypical placeholders of the intended characters. The whole rogue planet explorers is a storytelling goldmine, and so is this fictional all women universe; make use of them.
This is great for a demo but really bad for an introduction to a larger game as you have already offered the player a lot of the sex stuff without getting them to care about the characters so you'll have a very hard time to develop from there. So my advice is this: think of a good story (ask for help if you need it), pace yourself (nobody likes premature finishers
) and strike a balance between choice relevance and story continuity (try alternating between small choices and big choices, choices with immediateand delayed effects, flavour text choices etc).
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