YaYa_UnTIN2

Misunderstood Thinker
Donor
Dec 19, 2017
597
669
I've done a text file for the old version, will rethink the format when I do the update for the current version.
David Carr , yes will probably be PDF
YaYa_UnTIN2 , thanks too!
Edit: done. New doc in PDF with better table formatting. (I think!)
Much easier to read than your original post.

Update - I've updated my original post, linking to Caiatris's new pdf post, and removed my own linked pdf version for download. :)

Thanks
 
Last edited:

dumbass55

Active Member
Jun 23, 2019
501
632
That Flavia scene is hot but don't like the way how MC got her .
Yeah it's pretty weird that you don't even have the option to tell Talita's boyfriend that she's cheating on him, because "there's no telling what he'll do". What? Is he supposed to turn into some rage induced killing machine after he hears that his girlfriend is cheating on him? I couldn't possibly come up with a worse excuse if I tried. Why can't the MC just acknowledge the fact that he's a cold hearted POS? It's not like he's had a problem fucking or making advances on other girls that had boyfriends. It's out of character for him to care in the first place, no need to insert the world's flimsiest justification.
 

Raboobie

Member
Oct 6, 2020
164
878
Wtf happened to Rosaline? Lmao
Nothing good.
Stay at home mom to suddenly the most powerful person in the town... yeah right.

Yeah it's pretty weird that you don't even have the option to tell Talita's boyfriend that she's cheating on him, because "there's no telling what he'll do". What? Is he supposed to turn into some rage induced killing machine after he hears that his girlfriend is cheating on him? I couldn't possibly come up with a worse excuse if I tried. Why can't the MC just acknowledge the fact that he's a cold hearted POS? It's not like he's had a problem fucking or making advances on other girls that had boyfriends. It's out of character for him to care in the first place, no need to insert the world's flimsiest justification.
This dev is the king of worst excuses.
Candice has bf, but he's gay.
Rosa wants to fuck the deputy dickhead, but is not able to because he can't get it up. To make it worse, she had the intent, then when he can't perform she turns on him and mocks him behind his back, she is total trash.
Flavia - let's blackmail her into sex.
Can't wait for the next lame excuse for whatever reason the college gf, is still with her other /real boyfriend.
 

Raziel_8

Engaged Member
Dec 4, 2017
3,431
8,759
Nothing good.
Stay at home mom to suddenly the most powerful person in the town... yeah right.


This dev is the king of worst excuses.
Candice has bf, but he's gay.
Rosa wants to fuck the deputy dickhead, but is not able to because he can't get it up. To make it worse, she had the intent, then when he can't perform she turns on him and mocks him behind his back, she is total trash.
Flavia - let's blackmail her into sex.
Can't wait for the next lame excuse for whatever reason the college gf, is still with her other /real boyfriend.
Yeah no idea how Rosa is or could be the most powerfull person in town, doesn't fit with anything seen so far from her.

As for her thing with the deputy, that was just bad.
Had to laught at the talk she had with the MC, how did she say it...She wont give herself to anyone which doesn't live up to her expections and she knows her value.
So she is fine with anyone, as long as the dick works, got it
 

Nurikabe

Well-Known Member
Feb 10, 2021
1,328
2,868
While Rosa interjecting herself into town politics seems abrupt, it has been building. We know she has money and influence. That is about it. Still, her forceful "I made you who you are" talk with the mayor seems sudden. All we really know about the Deputy and Rosa is appearances. They went on a date; it was possibly the first date? So why talk shit about the deputy? Maybe she has some resentment? I would not say the author made some huge leaps, but he is expecting a lot of his readers.

There is some incongruity in the MC's behavior. The relationship with Talita? I blame that on the author trying to please the crowd. She is gay. But so many people wanted to have a relationship with her (or at least fuck her). That storyline makes a lot more sense if you do not have sex with her. I don't think I am being too generous or easy on the author, there are still a lot of holes in the plot. I guess I am not as bothered by Rosa's behavior because I expected it to go that way.

And we are just starting to get into what is strange about Free Will. Long way to go.
 

Naxos

Engaged Member
May 9, 2018
2,490
6,860
While Rosa interjecting herself into town politics seems abrupt, it has been building. We know she has money and influence. That is about it. Still, her forceful "I made you who you are" talk with the mayor seems sudden. All we really know about the Deputy and Rosa is appearances. They went on a date; it was possibly the first date? So why talk shit about the deputy? Maybe she has some resentment? I would not say the author made some huge leaps, but he is expecting a lot of his readers.

There is some incongruity in the MC's behavior. The relationship with Talita? I blame that on the author trying to please the crowd. She is gay. But so many people wanted to have a relationship with her (or at least fuck her). That storyline makes a lot more sense if you do not have sex with her. I don't think I am being too generous or easy on the author, there are still a lot of holes in the plot. I guess I am not as bothered by Rosa's behavior because I expected it to go that way.

And we are just starting to get into what is strange about Free Will. Long way to go.
Rosa's been shown to have the kind of money that allows her to live somewhat comfortably, not the FU money needed for the power and influence she suddenly seems to have.

So why talk shit about the deputy?
Do you mean her or the players? The players it obvious because of the why he treated the MC and Timo, plus his interest in Rosa.
If you mean Rosa, it just shows what a shitty person she is. Every positive I had about Rosa was destroyed in this update, she's nothing but a bitch. The friendly helpful persona she shows the MC is nothing but an act. Rosa cares about Rosa and not another soul. The lording it over they mayor with "I made you who you are", the belittling of the deputy dick, and the fact she's fuck anyone as long as they can satisfy her with zero regard for them. I fail to see how people can still defend her. Not once does she say she'd never have fucked the deputy under any circumstances, only that she wouldn't because his dick didn't work and he wouldn't be able to satisfy her.

They went on a date; it was possibly the first date?
She mentioned they had been dating for a few days so it was clearly not their first date. If it was their first date and she agreed to go home with him when he asked at the end of the date, which she did as we find her at his the next morning, would again ruin her character as a LI in a romance vn.

Honestly I think the dev has story in mind that doesn't suit his target audience, so he's changed it little by little to bring the story into the clear for the audience but by doing as little as possible and still keeps very close to the line and crosses in places.

The "reasons" behind Candace's bf and why Rosa didn't fuck the deputy might have been planned from the very start but to me come across as "oh shit, i need to fix that" because the dev wanted them one way, but didn't like the blow back from players.
 

Nurikabe

Well-Known Member
Feb 10, 2021
1,328
2,868
Honestly I think the dev has story in mind that doesn't suit his target audience, so he's changed it little by little to bring the story into the clear for the audience but by doing as little as possible and still keeps very close to the line and crosses in places.
I think this is really what is happening here. And really, all developers do this to an extent. The advantage of posting novels here for early release is that you get the chance to polish the novel before full release. It comes with the huge disadvantage of having people read a work-in-progress (to include half-baked ideas). It is certainly necessary to have a strong sense of your story, a backbone, a blind eye, and a deaf ear when it comes to dealing with internet forum feedback.

As for the sudden "change" in Rosa's behavior, it's pure speculation at this point. But like I said above, I saw it coming so it did not hit me as being out-of-place. A woman in a man's world has to wear a pair of balls. It is possible for Rosa to be a loving caring woman at home and a ballbreaker at work. Still, I am left scratching my head wondering what comes next. I am hoping for the best!
 
  • Like
Reactions: acondo

Raziel_8

Engaged Member
Dec 4, 2017
3,431
8,759
Still, I am left scratching my head wondering what comes next. I am hoping for the best!
Well, we still need background info about the non-girlfriend (was it Kate ?).
Why is she in a relationship (doesn't want to break up), while apparently she is so in love with the MC and their affair seems going on for a while, or at least thats the impression i got.
And of course the reason why she isn't fucking her current bf. I mean we already have the gay bf of the ex and the limp deputy, so im really curious what reason we will get for her...maybe her bf has vowed celibacy or sex only after marriage :whistle:
 

Deleted member 15555

Harem Lover
Donor
Apr 25, 2017
3,482
11,906
and the fact she's fuck anyone as long as they can satisfy her with zero regard for them
I swear you always read a lot of things wrong in games, where the hell do you get she did fuck anyone as long they can satisfy her?

That phrase was never said that way, she said she knew from the start the deputy won't be able to satisfy her, neither in a relationship or bed, she never said she will fuck anyone as long they can satisfy her, she even tell the mc she "knows" her value :FacePalm:

She has not had sex in a long time and is clear as day when you give the massage and other scenes in the game with her.
 
Last edited:
4.30 star(s) 66 Votes