This game is completely unplayable, the controls are shit, there's no way to do anything without watching hours of tutorials that tell you fuck all... I just want to make characters fuck, and I can't get rid of this tribal bitch for a different character.
Fuck this game and I'm glad I didn't pay for this hunk of shit.
This seems like a 'you' problem. The controls while basic, do exactly what you'd expect. The only controls that are not completely easy to get from the start are the sandbox building. But Steve made a video for it for that very purpose, if that is what you are strugling with, go watch it.
For the customization, it's straight forward. 'O' to customize currently posesed character, with option to save a preset that you can then load. 'T' to spawn a character. To control this new character, walk towards them and hit 'E', and select posses option.
If you want to have a sex scene you need to pair correct 'models' together. If you want a regural 1 on 1, just walk to the right person while controling the other one. If you want threesome or more, you have to all but 1 npcs on 'follow', that will give you the group sex option.