VN Ren'Py Completed Alison Fall of the Apple [v1.0] [OneManVN]

[Ennoch]

Johny at least got some, as you may recall that hot AF girl who he totally did not deserve in any universe... Said, "I got to have you." So I guess he got some.

Its just that Johnny's girlfriend was ..hmm.. okay lets rephrase this one. So the totally awesome redhad girl who ended up being not a complete asshole but a freakishly amazing and truely in love bestgirl has uncanny similarities with Mel. At her first appearance she was badass yet with the MC she was kinda the whack job, regardless being a cop she had this immaturity vibe there. Yet soon after it turns out that Mel is the embodiment of more-than-meets-the-eye and she is like one amazing woman actually on more than one level.

She lust for the mc, the mc resist. Emotional hasn't-got-over nonsense! Like Johnny.

After heinous amount of time he finally realizes that "hey.. maybe i and Mel could have sex" to what Mel replies "Fuckin' finally sweetheart, you sure took your time to get there", to what the mc "Uh, yeah, but maybe.." to, again, Mel "One more fuckin' 'but' and i'm honna rape you so dong out, mind closed, fill me up cowboy."
So they do.. have a quick romp, and no chance since then. Just like with Jonny and Dizzy.

I hope the rest won't follow the Starshiptrooper script Have i mentioned that i hate bugs? Cockblocking bugs in particular.

 

[OneManVN]

Its just that Johnny's girlfriend was ..hmm.. okay lets rephrase this one. So the totally awesome redhad girl who ended up being not a complete asshole but a freakishly amazing and truely in love bestgirl has uncanny similarities with Mel. At her first appearance she was badas yet with the MC she was kidna the whack job, regardless being a cop she had this immaturity vibe there. Yet soon after it turns out that Mel is the embodiment of more-than-meets-the-eye and she is like one amazing woman actually on more than one level.

She lust for the mc, the mc resist. Emotional hasn't-got-over nonsense! Like Johnny.

After heinous amount of time he finally realizes that "hey.. maybe i and Mel could have sex" to what Mel replies "Fuckin' finally sweetheart, you sure took your time to get there", to what the mc "Uh, yeah, but maybe.." to, again, Mel "One more fuckin' 'but' and i'm honna rape you so dong out, mind closed, fill me up cowboy."
So they do.. have a quick romp, and no chance since then. Just like with Jonny and Dizzy.

I hope the rest won't follow the Starshiptrooper script Have i mentioned that i hate bugs? Cockblocking bugs in particular.

I fucking hated Johny's first GF as much as I hate cockblocking bugs. Harem is cockblocker free. The only cockblockers right now are patrons... And by that, I mean a lack of them. No funds, no way to render as much as I would like. Do you really think I'd release updates with 30-60-90 renders if I had the means to deliver 500? That's why I hate certain people with passion. They assume that we are all pro's from birth... And expect us to deliver god like content at the speed of light, while at the same time, we need to hire Steven mother fin Spielberg to make they're free of charge game amazingly fun to play. And then, maybe just maybe, they will decide to give you 1$ It takes me sacrificing entire weekend's monthly without a single day of a break when I am working on this. And even then it's barely hitting 240-250. But I am getting better at it, with Octane and the new PC coming, it should get to the 500 renders per update I've always wanted to deliver. Even as a single person working on this.

 

[Ennoch]

I fucking hated Johny's first GF as much as I hate cockblocking bugs

Haha iknowright? That girl. Ugh. I must say it was quite revolutionary so to speak since it was almost impossible to imagine that the macho soldier protagonist is dumped like that on screen in movies. Its still rare, we usually pick up the story after divorce or separation or whatever. But that movie was one hilariously fun movie.

Well she is a careerist and the rest was just screen. Johnny wasn't the sharpest kid to read the signs. Still the girl was a bitch. The movie tried hard to redeem her later, so hard in fact that it was kinda sweaty. She got saved and didn't even give a little peck. Was weird. They were friends since childhood beside everything else for ffs. Nah, i think she was asexual or secretly in love with starships. Probably had a starship shaped dildo me thinks.

The rest.. i don't even wish to get into. No need to shake the horner nest. We know the drill. Do what you can. Some will hate your work no matter what, they have the right to do so, let them. You aren't making your story for them. Simple. Yeah, common sense bs i know but it works.

 

[OneManVN]

Haha iknowright? That girl. Ugh. I must say it was quite revolutionary so to speak since it was almost impossible to imagine that the macho soldier protagonist is dumped like that on screen in movies. Its still rare, we usually pick up the story after divorse or speraration or whatever. But that movie was one hilariously fun movie.

Well she is a careerist and the rest was just screen. Johnny wasn't the sharpest kid to read the signs. Still the girl was a bitch. The movies tried hard to redeem her later, so hard in fact that it was kinda sweaty. She got saved and didn't even give a little peck. Was weird. They were friends since childhood beside everything else for ffs. Nah, i think she was asexual or secretly in love with starships. Probably had a starship shaped dildo me thinks.

The rest.. i don't even wish to get into. No need to shake the horner nest. We know the drill. Do what you can. Some will hate your work no matter what, they have the right to do so, let them. You aren't make your story for them. Simple. Yeah, common sense bs i know but it works.

Yup, I'm not shaking any trees or poking any nests. I'm just talking about what is expected of me, VS reality.

 

[Ennoch]

VS reality.

Lets just say that having a proper sense/grip on reality is a challenge for some I'm a well known delusional for example.

 

[OneManVN]

Lets just say that having a proper sense/grip on reality is a challenge for some I'm a well known delusional for example.

Anyhow, the inevitable permanent absence from F95 is close. It is the only way I will be able to continue working on the game/games without having to deal with that shit. Those who want to talk to me can easily do so over discord. At least there I can kick people in the face with full force as they bounce out the door.

 

[Avaron1974]

I just want to say I legit cried when Dizzy died.

Should have been Carmen.

Even Dizzy's ghost in the newest animated movie was better than Carmen.

Seriously, fuck Carmen but not in the nice way.

 

[OneManVN]

I just want to say I legit cried when Dizzy died.

Should have been Carmen.

Even Dizzy's ghost in the newest animated movie was better than Carmen.

Seriously, fuck Carmen but not in the nice way.

Agreed. I'd love to see her die violently to a bug, slowly, but violently nonetheless. Maybe after she gets turned in to a bug incubator.

 

[Ennoch]

I just want to say I legit cried when Dizzy died.

I don't, i considered it an "awww" but its war. But you know what infuriated me? At her funeral they were all smiling, hugging eachother walking away happily ever after style. Wtf was that?

 

[Tiago Patrício]

I have played many other Ren'py games before but none had a story with as much quality as the story this game has, so congratulations to the author!!!

 

[Vrdr]

Not sure if anyone pointed it out, but on harem route, Alice uses 'Michael' instead of the custom name as the girls all come home.

 

[Ennoch]

I have played many other Ren'py games before but none had a story with as much quality as the story this game has

I don't agree with this, i don't think this has the best story even if we consider different strokes in taste. What i do think that this is one of the most woefully underappreciated one.

 

[OneManVN]

Not sure if anyone pointed it out, but on harem route, Alice uses 'Michael' instead of the custom name as the girls all come home.

I'll take a look at it and fix it for next release, thanks for trying out the game and bringing it to my attention. It's likely an old remnant of the change from "Michael" to "MC"

 

[OneManVN]

elm0 Thank you for trying out the game, and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Here is a brief explanation of why some of the things you pointed out are the way they are. Too much text, I agree. In the early updates, as many of you have noticed, I could only deliver 30-50 renders, this was due to hardware limitations. I only had an I7 3770 and no Nvidia GPU at all.

This made 30 renders take 90 hours+ Which meant I had to use as much text as possible to tell the story. Pair that with me being a complete amateur in VN making early on, and you get what you see. I work alone on this, so although I know there are issues that I/could/should fix... And many things I could/should improve on. I can't do it while at the same time releasing monthly content. Now I have 2x 2080 RTX GPU's and a Ryzen 3900X on the way, things will improve drastically and soon.

"Kinetic" The story is linear on purpose on all three paths, up to a certain point. So I am glad you were kind enough to specify that this is an issue only up to this version. With 0.4.3 Love path, for example, will get some big and actually important choices. Harem as well when its turn comes around for development.

Harem will also reach to the point where choices will be coming at you with each new update. In short, it is only a matter of workload, and the right timing in the story to deliver those choices. Unlike many other VN's out there, I don't just want choices that add an additional line of text or two, I make my choices carry weight/importance and consequences. And for that, I need to deliver renders.

Dom is the perfect example of what I have in mind for the future when choices are concerned. You get main choices, then you get sub choices which also branch out to different paths. This is an ambitious project, one that I will no doubt be working on for quite some time. So stick around, and hopefully the next build let's you see some more choices

 

[OneManVN]

Not sure if anyone pointed it out, but on harem route, Alice uses 'Michael' instead of the custom name as the girls all come home.

I just made the change, so it will be fixed for the next update, once again thank you.

 

[elm0]

OneManVN thx for reading my review, but i wrote 90% my personal feelings/preferences. actualy i prefer some sandboxing elements (its only my preferences, plz make game as u wish, dnt pay attention to me), and normaly dnt play novells, but ur game was interesting. normaly i write review if i motivated for that- game flawless or unplayable or great idea covered by disgusting realisation. i understand that game have wip status, and i hvnt wroten about some nonused variables, i mean- if i ll see errors in code i ll write "bugs present", but in wip stage nonused variables mean "preparation" for future development.
i wish good luck in ur work!
/btw deutsche translation planing?

 

[OneManVN]

OneManVN thx for reading my review, but i wrote 90% my personal feelings/preferences. actualy i prefer some sandboxing elements (its only my preferences, plz make game as u wish, dnt pay attention to me), and normaly dnt play novells, but ur game was interesting. normaly i write review if i motivated for that- game flawless or unplayable or great idea covered by disgusting realisation. i understand that game have wip status, and i hvnt wroten about some nonused variables, i mean- if i ll see errors in code i ll write "bugs present", but in wip stage nonused variables mean "preparation" for future development.
i wish good luck in ur work!
/btw Deutsche translation planing?

There was someone who was working on the German translation... But I'm not so sure anymore. And I can't do it myself. Maybe if someone who speaks fluent German decides to take it up, then I don't see why not.

 

[proximusArka]

Is any walkthrough available!

 

[unevenrm]

He-he. On the picture where Melissa runs away (strawberries etc.), Alison looks exactly like good old friend of mine (not so old and not so friend )

 

[unevenrm]

Crazy fnny intrigue etc. It makes you to cry, to laugh, to feel pity, to think, to regret (to think not to move into NY )
On one breathe... But lack of renders' variety. But I can live with it.... for now
Thats how you devs should write your stories.
Thanx, mate....
Keep up
PS: why so prejudice about russian women? The're not so chubby (*whispering* I am Russian and I know the're beautiful )