- Mar 24, 2021
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#BlancheNotLikeThis Gallant Trombe that's not how it was supposed to go. our deal was clear, you make a shitty game. you failed that task.
My impression was that Mireille is not entirely forthcoming with the MC, about the extent of her activities. Beautiful character by the way.
The story veers into arbitrariness a couple times (like, I'm still not sure what the deal with the gangster gang and Aria and that Lady was, just too much "who set up who?" going on). In general the writing and worldbuilding is really good though.
The story veers into arbitrariness a couple times (like, I'm still not sure what the deal with the gangster gang and Aria and that Lady was, just too much "who set up who?" going on). In general the writing and worldbuilding is really good though.
It's noir sci-fi. It's not supposed to be clear about what's going on at this early stage of the story. Each of the scenes is a vignette, gradually filling in enough details that you might be able to piece it together.
And keep in mind that the player has seen more of the story than MC has - i.e. the meeting between Safiya and the Duke, Miri (?) secretly speaking with her handler. There's multiple factions, and MC is a pawn caught in the middle.
Stories like this are
delicious.Right, but it was still a bit too much schemery at once for my tastes. It was mainly the scenes with long discussions they had where they seemed stuck in a rut about who/what is doing what and what they should be doing. As I said my gripe is pretty small though, since overall the writing was excellent. I prefer the story to follow the MC pretty closely and reveal things gradually.
100% agree with this, absolutely love stories like this where things come into place slowly without being too vague to bore one. And the characters are super cool and beautiful... already one of my top VNs if this continuesIt's noir sci-fi. It's not supposed to be clear about what's going on at this early stage of the story. Each of the scenes is a vignette, gradually filling in enough details that you might be able to piece it together.
And keep in mind that the player has seen more of the story than MC has - i.e. the meeting between Safiya and the Duke, Miri (?) secretly speaking with her handler. There's multiple factions, and MC is a pawn caught in the middle.
Stories like this are
- Jun 18, 2022
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The first rule of Assassin Club is you do not talk about Assassin Club.
- Oct 9, 2017
- 626
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nice
Oh Mirielle, you're making me feel all funny
My editor can't even spell Mireille correctlyOh Mirielle, you're making me feel all funny
- Feb 18, 2018
- 508
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She can ASS ASS Inate me every day of the week.
Thank you for an ASStronomic preview.
Developer? I'd like a word about your marketing.
Beautiful artwork. Intriguing name. Terrible ad copy. You've got this big sci-fi info-dump full of proper nouns I've never heard of before and I have to dig through all of that crammed-in exposition to pick out the 2 or 3 words that would actually motivate me to want to know more about the story? It's not ideal.
Try doing it like an action movie trailer. We all know what those sound like by now, right? They follow a very obvious pattern. And they keep reusing that pattern over and over again, because it works. Go ahead and imagine the following in the Mr. Universe/
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voice, if you like:In a galaxy torn apart by rebellion, one man must thread the needle between the loyalty of his unit and the treachery of his empire. As commanding officer of Special Operations Squad "Nu," you'll need to pay close attention and trust no one if you want your team to survive. Discover each colleague's hidden agendas and personal stakes, earn their loyalty, and maybe even find love as you lead your unit to glory... or defeat.
I Ciri What You Did There,
A Surprisingly Polished Model,
The Ugly Duckling In Every Teen Comedy Movie,
And lots... and lots... of pink and blue neon!
(title reveal)
Sorry, I slipped into full Honest Trailers mode there at the end. (Which, itself, is actually pretty dishonest of me, since I haven't played it yet.) But hopefully you can see how much shorter, more concise, and more compelling the action movie treatment is. We don't need to know the name of the empire. We probably don't even need to know the name of the Squad. You can save that stuff for inside the game. But I kept the squad name in because you get (at most) exactly one proper noun in your introduction, and this seemed like the most salient of your options. If there were a name of a ship that you fly around in all the time, I'd have used that instead, because it's sure to be the name that gets mentioned the most by other characters.
(Edit: I changed "if you want to survive" to "if you want your team to survive" to make it clear that "trust no one" doesn't necessarily apply to your own crew. You know, since trust is kind of a necessary precondition for love. I don't know what you're doing with the story and the tone and the player's choices, though, so tweak it as you see fit. The point is to make it short and flavorful.)
Hope this helps. Good luck.
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Dear TranscendentThots,
Are you Gallant Trombe 's secret twin who was separated at birth?
Sincerely,
"Basking in the warm caring glow of your obviously superior intellect"
Osanaiko
Are you Gallant Trombe 's secret twin who was separated at birth?
Sincerely,
"Basking in the warm caring glow of your obviously superior intellect"
Osanaiko
Okay this is kind of weird.
I'm sure I've heard that meme before? But I can't find it now by googling. What's that from?
Thanks for the suggestion. I plan on rewriting the overview for the next update anyway.
- Mar 3, 2018
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- Mar 19, 2021
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Do the choices in this game changes the outcome in the future or the way girls see us in this game.
For instance after the death of grace, Lana offers to release some stress for mc. If we let her do that, does she lose her respect for us or do we get love points for stopping her.
For instance after the death of grace, Lana offers to release some stress for mc. If we let her do that, does she lose her respect for us or do we get love points for stopping her.
- Jul 10, 2017
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MC and Lana have the most in common and would do best together sharing the command in battle. Some thoughts:
You say ”Yes” to Lana. Unflinching, strong throbbing and sincere ”Yes” to being with her.
Because that is WHAT A COMMANDING MC does- STANDS UP AND PINING FOR HIS BABES.
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You say ”Yes” to Lana. Unflinching, strong throbbing and sincere ”Yes” to being with her.
Because that is WHAT A COMMANDING MC does- STANDS UP AND PINING FOR HIS BABES.