RPGM Abandoned Death's Punishment [v0.46 bugfix] [Crazyreborn]

4.60 star(s) 8 Votes

lakano

Member
Dec 8, 2020
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Hey, thank you for your feedback; it means a lot. I agree with a lot of what you have said. So, I do not deny that it needs a lot of work.



You are right; there aren't a lot of challenges when it comes to her being dominant. Mainly because I haven't dedicated enough time to Domination mechanics as I have submissive. So, the dominations you see are super easy to achieve, and of course, you are right; it needs more challenge and more complexity.

In the start, I didn't want her to roll over like that; I do plan to heavily rewrite Ruby and a few starter characters because, again, I agree, her character's personality is supposed to be dominant and not roll over.

It may feel like a cheat option, but it's mostly inexperience. I think my mind is making it more complicated to write because it's a game. I think I'm rushing writing because of space. I can write a story for this game, but for some reason, my mind makes it complicated to translate it into the game, and I need to work on that.



There is a lot I want to do to improve the game. Like all those lacking dialog choices? I want to rewrite them. Because you are right, I want the player to earn them. I don't want it as easy as "Yes!" except I did do this in the Inn because at this point, she has lost everyone's respect.



My idea was that Kim enters this world after being a dominant one in her last world; she is cursed by death to be swayed into submission. However, she can be prevalent as well.



I value your feedback; I'm a new developer, and I'm still learning a lot. Though, I should be doing better when it comes to the game's writing since that is what I'm used to, lol.

Your advice is fair, taking the time and focusing on the situations and such, which is something I plan to do. I just wanted to make sure I had a few characters to work with, a couple of maps, etc.

Anyways, I want a lot of the writing before I dig into more of the world as I have more maps and such (in the progress, of course).





Thank you. Yes, I do agree. I do need to work on it =).
tbh i like the idea that she had some inherent submissive desires in her and this place makes that bloom i dont like being forced into submission
 

Deleted member 2164995

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tbh i like the idea that she had some inherent submissive desires in her and this place makes that bloom i dont like being forced into submission

My Idea is to keep her inherent submissive and dominant like a switch in real life (like my self lol). But I wanted her Submissive side to be affected because she is a new world. In her old world, she was a straight dominant.

I am going to focus the next update on updating dialog and such and dialogue might change but, I am not planning on changing her desire to submit as it is part of the story however, I don't want to have bland dialog lol.

I need to stop letting my doubts control my writing =D. SPACE BE DAMMED. lol, hopefully, I can fit all my dialogue.
 
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Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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I'd support you on Patreon if you started 1 up. I like your game already, and it shows promise :)

Thank you, that means a lot! I'm more inclined to make a discord server for people who want that, but at the moment, Patreon isn't in my mind yet.

With everyone's feedback and kind words, it's been a great motivator. Though I'll be shifting the next updates, focus on rewriting and creating a whole new system where your choices matter, you fall into a new social class, and it will affect everyone around you and how they treat you.

This is mostly because everyone willing to give me feedback! Thank you.

So I hope that will be fun =D.
 
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Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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I really like what's here so far. I love how cravenly submissive you can be right out of the gate, and I'm really looking forward to buying a house for that blonde slave who charges you to eat her out.
I hope there's lots more cunnilingus in the future of this game.

Haha thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it. I hope you enjoy the next update as things will change. Hopefully for the better! Thank you for playing.

And of course, cunnilingus should be a thing in a lesbian based game! In my opinion at least haha.
 
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Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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Gonna wait a while to let it have more material. Please include bdsm gear if you are doing bdsm based game, we need it here
Thanks for at least trying it. I have so many plans and a whole list for this game, but, it's all about me taking the time to implement them haha.

See, before I shared my game I wanted to add BDSM gear, I don't mind it, however, I'm not an artist, I can barely make icons for them but if I managed to add them as icons and sell them in a store, it wouldn't sadly be reflected on any of the character's if they were wearing one or not and I wish I was able to find accessories of such for my characters.

feel free to suggest anything else though. I am always open to suggestions.

Well obviously :p
I'm just hoping it'll be a big, main, recurring thing that gets a lot of focus.
haha fair enough! Typically, when I write Lesbian stories and such they focus on 3 main things, Femdom, Foot fetish, and body worship (and cunnilingus is a huge part of this).

Not sure which version you have played but I'm pretty sure I add a scene in the inn. But don't fret. It's something I don't mind writing at all. Though, since Its a lot of foot fetish in this game.. you may run into that a lot more lol.
 
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Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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Well, right now if you talk to the innkeeper after renting a doghouse, she'll ask if you want to crawl under her desk. How about an option to do that?

Haha. That’s actually planned! I put that in there as a tease. So yes. I have written it out however, I enjoy writing 3 scenes per character at least so everyone can enjoy multiple scenes :).
 
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Yandere Lust

Newbie
Nov 8, 2020
95
164
Overall thought from the demo. You don't really provide a reason for the player charachter to be submisive. In the intro she's clearly designed as a distinct charachter. So it feels weird when confronted with a hard scenario and she INSTANTLY rolls over. Meanwhile, none of the situations where she is being dominant come in the form of a remote challenge.

You should take some time to ask "What is the charachter's motivation to behave this way" and design situations that way.

An argument can be made that by choosing the submisive options for the MC, the players is defining her personality. But, that feels like a cheat option to avoid coming up with circumstances that dig into the psychology of power. You should design a world and circumstance where even if the player chooses to define the MC that way, her choices still fit coherently into a narrative.

I would try to think of situations as "Challenges" or "Conflicts". What is the conflict? What is the submisive way to resolve the conflict? What is the dominant way? Is there a situation where a normally dominant person would pick the submisive way? How much the dominant option be charachterizing or surprising?

The scenes I encountered were like
Charachter: Sub to me!
Player Charachter: No!
Charachter: Okay!

or

Charachter: Sub to me!
Player Characher: Okay!

You gotta put more work into making it feel earned.
I'm a bit confused by this feedback. The precedent for the submissive options being a desire for the protagonist is that she was cursed by Death to have such desires, presumably to the point that she goes out of her way to be submissive to others due to a desire from the curse overpowering her senses, and ultimately making her become someone ruled by a desire to submit and be humiliated and useful in the service of others. Perhaps the issue is that this was not obvious enough for you to get that from the dialogue? Do you think maybe it would be good for there to be something aside from reputation to keep track of the protagonist's state of mind to make it more apparent where the protagonist is mentally due to the player choosing the option for her to give into the desires from the curse?
 

Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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I'm a bit confused by this feedback. The precedent for the submissive options being a desire for the protagonist is that she was cursed by Death to have such desires, presumably to the point that she goes out of her way to be submissive to others due to a desire from the curse overpowering her senses, and ultimately making her become someone ruled by a desire to submit and be humiliated and useful in the service of others. Perhaps the issue is that this was not obvious enough for you to get that from the dialogue? Do you think maybe it would be good for there to be something aside from reputation to keep track of the protagonist's state of mind to make it more apparent where the protagonist is mentally due to the player choosing the option for her to give into the desires from the curse?

These are good questions and I'd like to know the answers too.

Though, I did admit that my dialogue for her is lacking when it comes to the "yes," "okay" and such. I have begun a whole revamped process. Maybe it's too easy and quick to be submissive? Maybe that is what the feedback means.

Honestly, I have taken a lot of advice from everyone. I already set up a foundation for where being different social class due to player choice (all dependent on reputation and your sub/dom). oh, and I have included hidden choices (I liked that idea). This way, you don't jump into submitting and getting free scenes. Mostly because I want people to play the game too! lol.

So, in a way, whenever I get a chance to update it (I just have a lot I want to add-not stopping or anything), players will start to see more life to the two maps I already have AND the effect of your choices.

I really don't want it to be a 5min game where you run through all the events.

when I say put life into maps I MEAN LIFE. so many new characters + 3 events for each person depending on your social class (Reputation level) so there is a lot to come.

hopefully that will make it more rewarding.
 

Yandere Lust

Newbie
Nov 8, 2020
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These are good questions and I'd like to know the answers too.

Though, I did admit that my dialogue for her is lacking when it comes to the "yes," "okay" and such. I have begun a whole revamped process. Maybe it's too easy and quick to be submissive? Maybe that is what the feedback means.

Honestly, I have taken a lot of advice from everyone. I already set up a foundation for where being different social class due to player choice (all dependent on reputation and your sub/dom). oh, and I have included hidden choices (I liked that idea). This way, you don't jump into submitting and getting free scenes. Mostly because I want people to play the game too! lol.

So, in a way, whenever I get a chance to update it (I just have a lot I want to add-not stopping or anything), players will start to see more life to the two maps I already have AND the effect of your choices.

I really don't want it to be a 5min game where you run through all the events.

when I say put life into maps I MEAN LIFE. so many new characters + 3 events for each person depending on your social class (Reputation level) so there is a lot to come.

hopefully that will make it more rewarding.
Yeah, I think things will start to come to life and take more shape the more you add to things. You can always go back and reshape the dialogue some afterwards. Getting too hung up on the details to the point of not getting the meat of the content going can cause development to take much longer than necessary. Also, the more that is put out, the more clear and on point feedback can be. It's honestly difficult to give highly targeted feedback with just what's in the game so far I feel. I too am looking forward to there being more to do. I like the idea of long games with tons of content.

You can also always go back and add more scenes to characters later too, building vertically as opposed to horizontally in a sense as well. Perhaps story progression down the road could lead to flags for new events even. E.g. let's say if you acquire wealth and status several chapters or so in, then you suddenly decide to have the player start to be overtaken by submission, and you go back to these earlier characters now, where new events take place as time has gone on, and you instead decide to give into submissive urges to the point that you end up agreeing to humiliating things that exchanges your accumulated wealth and status till you end up with nothing or what you have is used in service to others. Either or.

I think by creating complex choice options like that, you could add a lot of potential routes in the game to the point that it might even require multiple playthroughs to see all the various situations you could end up in. But, that's just an example of why getting the sheer meat of content going will allow for more tuning and options overall as the pieces begin to fall into place for doing so. At least, that's how it would seem to me.
 

Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
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Yeah, I think things will start to come to life and take more shape the more you add to things. You can always go back and reshape the dialogue some afterwards. Getting too hung up on the details to the point of not getting the meat of the content going can cause development to take much longer than necessary. Also, the more that is put out, the more clear and on point feedback can be. It's honestly difficult to give highly targeted feedback with just what's in the game so far I feel. I too am looking forward to there being more to do. I like the idea of long games with tons of content.

You can also always go back and add more scenes to characters later too, building vertically as opposed to horizontally in a sense as well. Perhaps story progression down the road could lead to flags for new events even. E.g. let's say if you acquire wealth and status several chapters or so in, then you suddenly decide to have the player start to be overtaken by submission, and you go back to these earlier characters now, where new events take place as time has gone on, and you instead decide to give into submissive urges to the point that you end up agreeing to humiliating things that exchanges your accumulated wealth and status till you end up with nothing or what you have is used in service to others. Either or.

I think by creating complex choice options like that, you could add a lot of potential routes in the game to the point that it might even require multiple playthroughs to see all the various situations you could end up in. But, that's just an example of why getting the sheer meat of content going will allow for more tuning and options overall as the pieces begin to fall into place for doing so. At least, that's how it would seem to me.

You are right; I don’t want to get hung up too much on the details and backtrack. Though, I am going to backtrack a bit so I can at least finish up the foundation of the game. Social class is a huge part that plays hand in hand with Reputation, and that all ties in with the player’s choice of being submissive or being dominant.

I understand the feedback part; however, I value any feedback, and I hope you keep it coming even in the future.

I love games like this with a lot of content, so I decided to make my own, lol. A lot of the games I like tend to end up paused or abandoned. So, I was like, what the heck? Why not do it? So here I am.

You are right; with the foundation set, it isn’t hard but time-consuming to add more scenes to each person! That is why I can always go back and do it later on.

I agree with you about the story progression, and that is something that needs a lot of work, too, because I want to process the story; the idea is to meet the queen eventually. Choices you make will affect your social status and affect the story progression, which is the plan.

The idea of having Kim being famous, wealthy and end up losing all her money and falling to submission is fun.

(Though I won’t spoil anything. I have a fun plan for Kim. But I want to finish other things, lol)



I only have these two maps, and I want to fill them up with meat, lol. I’m very picky; I want everything I put to matter; that is why I don’t want any NPCs who have 1 line.



But, thank you as always. Hopefully, you will have more to give feedback on when I have more in there.
 

Wyldkat1

Newbie
Sep 15, 2020
18
13
just downloaded the game, folder was named New World Order and when clicking on run game error message stated cannot initialize graphics??...any help??
 

Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
Mar 30, 2020
591
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just downloaded the game, folder was named New World Order and when clicking on run game error message stated cannot initialize graphics??...any help??
Hmm. That’s right. But what’s the full error? (you have the right folder...)

I actually really like that you can just be submissive without wasting any time. It felt like the game knew why I'm playing it and gave me what I wanted instead of yanking me around. Having her internal monologue question her submission struck me as a fine compromise to keeping her character intact - and made the submissive curse effect on her actually feel magical, as if her true personality is imprisoned within her.

Thank you. I didn't mean to miss your reply or anything, I passed out. Thank you though and yeah I do like to write the internal monologue that shows her inner conflict =D I am glad you noticed haha.
 
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Ninjaman2

Member
Dec 4, 2018
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695
I feel like adding some internal monologue when she acts submissive... "Why am I doing this? Why am I liking this? This isn't who I am... what did Death do to me??" Something along those lines would fit the feedback you got from the other person earlier in the thread to justify why she's suddenly a sub.
 

Yandere Lust

Newbie
Nov 8, 2020
95
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I feel like adding some internal monologue when she acts submissive... "Why am I doing this? Why am I liking this? This isn't who I am... what did Death do to me??" Something along those lines would fit the feedback you got from the other person earlier in the thread to justify why she's suddenly a sub.
There is already internal monologue saying such things though. Another user even commented about it.
 

Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
Mar 30, 2020
591
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I feel like adding some internal monologue when she acts submissive... "Why am I doing this? Why am I liking this? This isn't who I am... what did Death do to me??" Something along those lines would fit the feedback you got from the other person earlier in the thread to justify why she's suddenly a sub.

I agree, actually I thought I was writing this. And since I’m in the writing phase. I do “what’s wrong with you?” I aim it at the player lol
 

lakano

Member
Dec 8, 2020
455
370
I feel like adding some internal monologue when she acts submissive... "Why am I doing this? Why am I liking this? This isn't who I am... what did Death do to me??" Something along those lines would fit the feedback you got from the other person earlier in the thread to justify why she's suddenly a sub.
it already has that wtf do you mean ? havevyou played it ?
 

Deleted member 2164995

Creator of Yuri games, cause why not?
Mar 30, 2020
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There is already internal monologue saying such things though. Another user even commented about it.
it already has that wtf do you mean ? havevyou played it ?
lol, Thank you both. If he didn't notice it, then I guess, he wasn't paying attention. it is what it is, I am just saying that every time I write, I include her inner monologue (somewhere not everywhere but yeah).
 
4.60 star(s) 8 Votes