- Thread starter veqvil
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- Jan 12, 2018
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- Nov 18, 2016
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To be fair last time patrons requested to be able to keep giving them money just to help (cause of mental issues).
So yeah. It's not like they are pretending the game is not on hold currently.
- Jun 15, 2018
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post with Patreon was posted earlier here, after which the game was overgrown with tags
- Nov 18, 2016
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- Jun 16, 2017
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He could have literally spent two minutes freezing his patreon account.
That would have stopped all this petty bickering.
That would have stopped all this petty bickering.
- Jun 5, 2018
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Reposting from Patreon for anyone interested. Game is abandoned again.
I've been thinking a long time about writing this post and I think it's the right move to be fully transparent here. These last few months were horrible and I am definitely going crazy taking the game apart and simply not being satisfied with both the content I'm currently working on and in the recent past.
There were moments where I was optimistic and thought "I will get there" if I just create and try out different versions of the scenes, and yet after all those attempts I end up going to bed feeling like I made the progress I can build on, only to find I scrap everything because it was horrible/unusable on the next day (It actually was horrible).
I would be lying if I said I don't feel burned out at this point.
Whenever I logged into discord, I just didn't know what to say, looking at how I am not delivering even though I am relentlessly grinding and spending my whole day on creating content for 0.08.5 for so long now.
I know people are waiting and have waited for some time now, but working on LaS now comes with pressure and stress to a point where it's almost crippling.
And that's what I want to announce in this post - I will be taking a break from working on LaS for the time being.
I'm sorry that I have to disappoint you guys, but I truly don't feel like I can keep going like this.
As for how long the pause on game development is going to be, I don't know, and to be honest, I don't want to set a date on it.
I will however still be checking into discord and maybe even make some posts about my thoughts on 3D related matters, but I really want to get a normal "relationship" with the project again, instead of waking up to a full day of failure and just feel like I am repeatedly hitting a wall.
While on the break I also plan to look into the script and I'm considering making changes to the dialogue or similar to avoid a repeat of the above. I don't want to run into something like this ever again and of course, I hope to come up with something that finally works.
I am not sure if it's simply a mindset thing or I may just be setting expectations for myself which I can't meet. Either way, I hope by taking a break I can both organize my life and get a healthy/normal sleep schedule once again. Also, I hope to get a less stressful mindset towards LaS in general (Which by all means is mostly self-imposed.).
As for the Patreon page, I've decided to leave things as they are for now as I have no idea how things are going to change (I will update the front page though).
I also completely understand that for many this is not professional nor acceptable, in that case, if you choose to drop or cancel your pledge altogether, I wholeheartedly want to thank you for checking out the game and for all previous support.
I will keep working on becoming the developer LaS and future projects need.
While this sucks, it is by no means the end. I will continue, I just can't say when that time will come.
For now, stay safe guys.
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I've been thinking a long time about writing this post and I think it's the right move to be fully transparent here. These last few months were horrible and I am definitely going crazy taking the game apart and simply not being satisfied with both the content I'm currently working on and in the recent past.
There were moments where I was optimistic and thought "I will get there" if I just create and try out different versions of the scenes, and yet after all those attempts I end up going to bed feeling like I made the progress I can build on, only to find I scrap everything because it was horrible/unusable on the next day (It actually was horrible).
I would be lying if I said I don't feel burned out at this point.
Whenever I logged into discord, I just didn't know what to say, looking at how I am not delivering even though I am relentlessly grinding and spending my whole day on creating content for 0.08.5 for so long now.
I know people are waiting and have waited for some time now, but working on LaS now comes with pressure and stress to a point where it's almost crippling.
And that's what I want to announce in this post - I will be taking a break from working on LaS for the time being.
I'm sorry that I have to disappoint you guys, but I truly don't feel like I can keep going like this.
As for how long the pause on game development is going to be, I don't know, and to be honest, I don't want to set a date on it.
I will however still be checking into discord and maybe even make some posts about my thoughts on 3D related matters, but I really want to get a normal "relationship" with the project again, instead of waking up to a full day of failure and just feel like I am repeatedly hitting a wall.
While on the break I also plan to look into the script and I'm considering making changes to the dialogue or similar to avoid a repeat of the above. I don't want to run into something like this ever again and of course, I hope to come up with something that finally works.
I am not sure if it's simply a mindset thing or I may just be setting expectations for myself which I can't meet. Either way, I hope by taking a break I can both organize my life and get a healthy/normal sleep schedule once again. Also, I hope to get a less stressful mindset towards LaS in general (Which by all means is mostly self-imposed.).
As for the Patreon page, I've decided to leave things as they are for now as I have no idea how things are going to change (I will update the front page though).
I also completely understand that for many this is not professional nor acceptable, in that case, if you choose to drop or cancel your pledge altogether, I wholeheartedly want to thank you for checking out the game and for all previous support.
I will keep working on becoming the developer LaS and future projects need.
While this sucks, it is by no means the end. I will continue, I just can't say when that time will come.
For now, stay safe guys.
So, would it be correct to assume that its not completely abandoned? Or would that be naive thinking?
- Jun 5, 2018
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Last time the guy took a good one year break. He does claim to have mental problems (taking meds for severe anxiety and depression I believe) So it's not the first time this has happened. So there is a chance he may go back and finally decide to release the renders he was working on. But if he really did just wake up and delete his entire 2 months of renders on a whim or something (not feeling they were good enough), then I am not sure... It may be a very long while if he did just have another breakdown. The guy has definitely been through a lot though (if you follow his old posts or Patreon from the first editions of the game, he was kicked out of his home by his parents and I think was homeless or staying with friends for a while and I think he is in high school or trying to save up for college) so I guess best guess is to wait and see? But from past history it may be a long time before an update gets posted.
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It's just straight up unprofessional. Since this type of work can be accomplished from home, the devs who have this pattern of behavior seem to have no ability to separate their projects from their personal lives. Yes, being invested in a project is what makes a difference in a good dev from a mediocre one. But so many otherwise good devs suffer from project burnout. It's because they can't pace themselves, get consumed by their work, and reach the point where they essentially hate their project because it's taken over their lives. What will a good dev really accomplish if they are unreliable?
Would this type of behavior be acceptable if they had an office job? "Hey, boss.. I got caught up in the TPS report over the weekend and couldn't sleep.. I stressed over it a bunch and ultimately had to stop working on it. Hope you understand. Maybe I'll get to it next month, okay?"
I'm no stranger to depression and anxiety, nor am I unfamiliar with the trap of letting your work consume you to the point of perfectionism. It crippled my own ability to work in the creative field for many years. Perhaps that's why I actually believe most of what devs like Veqvil and Stationmasterdev post when they abandon a project. But if you're still accepting money for these things, or if you don't provide transparency on how often you're going to work on a project (when you're actually working on it), I don't care your reasons - you are being unprofessional and deceitful, using (self)pity as a tool to pad your income rather than letting your work speak for itself.
Would this type of behavior be acceptable if they had an office job? "Hey, boss.. I got caught up in the TPS report over the weekend and couldn't sleep.. I stressed over it a bunch and ultimately had to stop working on it. Hope you understand. Maybe I'll get to it next month, okay?"
I'm no stranger to depression and anxiety, nor am I unfamiliar with the trap of letting your work consume you to the point of perfectionism. It crippled my own ability to work in the creative field for many years. Perhaps that's why I actually believe most of what devs like Veqvil and Stationmasterdev post when they abandon a project. But if you're still accepting money for these things, or if you don't provide transparency on how often you're going to work on a project (when you're actually working on it), I don't care your reasons - you are being unprofessional and deceitful, using (self)pity as a tool to pad your income rather than letting your work speak for itself.
The impression I had when reading the 'Hitting a wall' post was that Veq had been using the work as an escape. Trying the utmost to gain satisfaction out of getting it done exactly right. Perhaps to affirm life? It can mean a lot to have some thing go "right" when other parts of your life don't feel great. It gives perspective. "See, not all's bad." This could also explain why Veq has been adamant, as others have written, about not accepting help. Maybe some thing needed to go Veq's way, as a win to make up for defeat - and that made it too important emotionally. Anywho if Veq couldn't reach the fulfillment longed for... well.
Depression, and life, can come in waves. Some phases are good, some are bad. My bet is that when the tide is high Veq will return with force.
All in all I do sympathize, but the decision to keep payments going is no bueno.
Depression, and life, can come in waves. Some phases are good, some are bad. My bet is that when the tide is high Veq will return with force.
All in all I do sympathize, but the decision to keep payments going is no bueno.
- Sep 12, 2018
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Well the money could make bad things, depression included, a bit more bearable...
Or he doesn't have any depression and is just having a great time with free money.
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- Jun 16, 2017
- 7,191
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Last time I checked, he's not earning enough off patreon to be having a great time with anything.
Rent and utilities are quite costly.
For free? This is good money. I mean yes, it's not life changing, but no need to pretend that it's nothing. A lot of people work full-time and spend most of their lives doing for the same or less money.
It's hard to say what his motivations are because we aren't him. But I must observe that for someone who has been so hesitant to accept help from others concerning the development of his game, the line is not drawn when it comes to accepting payment.. There is a lot of speculation and ultimately only he will know what he's really capable of. And that's largely a frame of mind thing in itself.
But I do sympathize. Perhaps I'm a sucker buying into a con like some suggest, but I'd rather retain my empathy and get fooled once in awhile than give it up. But ultimately if it is a con, that's on him and not me. So no reason to feel bad about giving someone the benefit of the doubt. Its a shame to see, though because he is a fairly talented creator. Many of us wouldn't even be giving this thread the time of day if it weren't so.
Ultimately I'd have nothing poor to say about the guy if he just froze his patreon. I am a patient person and am not entitled to his content. I empathize if he has expenses to pay, but so do we all. Accepting charity through patreon is not going to solve his problems long term, and the safety net just tends to make people more hesitant to make meaningful changes with their lives.