VN Ren'Py Mayfly [v0.1 Reset] [JasonTon]

[Jas0nTon]

I recommend getting a native English speaker who is fluent with Chinese in order to make conversation smooth. I don't mind cultural differences but delivering the message from one language to another is not easy, especially considering all the differences between English and Mandarin Chinese.

I also recommend dev to finnish the main game first before branching the plot into different endings, I think the elf ending would satisfy most of players. The problem of dividing the plot in the middle of the game is that the workload easily doubles, triples, and most of the players won't notice the effort for they follow a special ending. Ravager is a perfect example of this mistake: instead of finnishing the main plot the devs decided to follow the plotline of each girl, and now more after a year the main plot has not developed at all. It is much more difficult to finish the game with +10 different endings than one, but it is much more easier to expand the existing game towards the direction the players want.

Personal ending, not necessarily.
There may be a different ending in the end, but not necessarily a personal ending.

Regarding the English question, my current English translator is a very responsible translator and he is very good.
This aspect I think is mainly because I am not a good writer, which causes him a lot of difficulties in translation. I apologize for that.

 

[qqq666qqq]

need more 18+ pictures

 

[Jas0nTon]

need more 18+ pictures

......
I think that's enough for now.

 

[DraxisSilencer1000]

Oh yeah, forgot to ask this but what are the plans for future updates?

Harem? Solo Girl Endings? Whatever else's? Future tags and whatnot. It would be nice if you could give many details in regards to your plans.

 

[Jas0nTon]

Oh yeah, forgot to ask this but what are the plans for future updates?

Harem? Solo Girl Endings? Whatever else's? Future tags and whatnot. It would be nice if you could give many details in regards to your plans.

If you're interested in the two labels you mentioned - harem, that's for sure.
The solo girl ending, which may or may not be there.
I would have the harem ending as the most dominant route development, and the solo girl ending... It's relatively not that important.

 

[zeph19]

Great game with beautiful visuals. These HS2-games are getting more and more beautiful.

I think the setting is super interesting and the worldbuilding is well done. There's A LOT of front-loaded information, though, which was a little difficult to digest in one single playthrough. Maybe a little more show instead of tell?

I like the characters a lot. Although our MC is getting pushed around quite a bit at the moment, he does have a likable personality that feels fresh with how aloof and playful he is.

The English is good and I had no real problem with it during my playthrough, I wonder why that's even discussed.

Game is on the watchlist. Looking forward to the next update!

 

[Jas0nTon]

Great game with beautiful visuals. These HS2-games are getting more and more beautiful.

I think the setting is super interesting and the worldbuilding is well done. There's A LOT of front-loaded information, though, which was a little difficult to digest in one single playthrough. Maybe a little more show instead of tell?

I like the characters a lot. Although our MC is getting pushed around quite a bit at the moment, he does have a likable personality that feels fresh with how aloof and playful he is.

The English is good and I had no real problem with it during my playthrough, I wonder why that's even discussed.

Game is on the watchlist. Looking forward to the next update!

Thank you for your love and support~

Regarding the worldview, in the official chapter (that is, after 0.3), the focus will be more on what Mc has done. These stories of his encounters will then be used to tell more of the worldview expansion.

(It's the first time I've seen positive comments about MC on this site TAT)

In English, I think it may be that I am not mature enough in writing, so that some players feel confused when playing, I will improve this point.

 

[Deleted member 2412505]

Dialogue needs heavy work. Characters talk too much but says so little. Too monotonic and awkward.

 

[Mr Smut]

There were a couple of times where I found myself a little confused with the dialogue, but even with that I am finding myself loving your game. Very curious where it is going, hoping for some deep romance atleast with "Goddess", felt like there could be some unspoken feelings on her side. None the less, I'm gonna wait for more releases before an actual review. But I just wanted to say I really hope you keep it up, I'm already hooked.

 

[VaerShyr]

Overall I really enjoyed this. The dialogue was fine, if a little wordy as mentioned above. The English was fine, a couple editing mistakes but perfectly understandable. My only two complaints are 1) Please don't use that blur effect during sex scenes. I didn't really understand the point to it, and to me it didn't improve the quality of the scenes. Which I think is sad because it's clear a lot of work was put into these renders. 2) I think the MC needs an opportunity to show how strong he is soon. We're told he's quite strong, second highest in his class, and yet other than when he ambushed two normal people, he pretty much just lost every encounter he had afterwards. While I understand from a story perspective why that would happen, if you're not careful it could lead to people thinking the MC is a push-over.

Otherwise I enjoyed your work very much, and am eagerly looking forward to more. Thank you for your hard work.

 

[Jas0nTon]

Overall I really enjoyed this. The dialogue was fine, if a little wordy as mentioned above. The English was fine, a couple editing mistakes but perfectly understandable. My only two complaints are 1) Please don't use that blur effect during sex scenes. I didn't really understand the point to it, and to me it didn't improve the quality of the scenes. Which I think is sad because it's clear a lot of work was put into these renders. 2) I think the MC needs an opportunity to show how strong he is soon. We're told he's quite strong, second highest in his class, and yet other than when he ambushed two normal people, he pretty much just lost every encounter he had afterwards. While I understand from a story perspective why that would happen, if you're not careful it could lead to people thinking the MC is a push-over.

Otherwise I enjoyed your work very much, and am eagerly looking forward to more. Thank you for your hard work.

I love your advice!

Actually, since this is my first creation, I need to have more feedback to help me improve some of my shortcomings.
Suggestions for dynamic scenes - well, blurring has been controversial, and I'll be looking at that in 0.3 and subsequent updates (or maybe having close-ups with blurring effects and large scene shots without? Maybe that's something I need to think about...)

On the issue of the main male combatant - well, I have prepared a lot of means of performance for him. He is very strong, but not experienced enough to face the veterans who have been in the society for a long time... Let's give him a little more of a chance, shall we?

Please look forward to 0.3 - also the official version of the first chapter of the update it ~

 

[claus001]

Did I understand the story correctly that MC's sister is alive and some short of villain?

 

[Jas0nTon]

Did I understand the story correctly that MC's sister is alive and some short of villain?

Indeed.

 

[claus001]

Indeed.

I like how unapologetically dystopic this game is.

 

[TiffanyMonroe]

So either that was a fake choice gameover or the game is incredibly short.

 

[jumper678]

fantastic renders and good story setting...looking forward to future updates... good stuff dev

 

[Jas0nTon]

So either that was a fake choice gameover or the game is incredibly short.

Yes, there is a small egg choice ending about JOJO in front.

Otherwise the game currently renders with 1700+, you should be able to have about an hour of playtime.

 

[Eversmann122]

1) Please don't use that blur effect during sex scenes. I didn't really understand the point to it, and to me it didn't improve the quality of the scenes. Which I think is sad because it's clear a lot of work was put into these renders.

Using the blur/bokeh and other such effects in rendering whether its a animation or still image is common practice in any and every "medium", so telling the Dev not to use it is kinda...not dumb but incorrect. Now using it correctly/properly is the hard part for every "artist". Now you are also correct that it is not needed in EVERY render/animation as the effect is often misused/overused and ruins the aesthetics of the image/render/animation, and I state below in my long winded rant about the use of the technique, I don't know what scene/s you are referring to but if you are referring to all of them then yeah while not all scenes may require the effect but some may and probably do if not for "flair" but for the fact it may hide "imperfections/unwanted things".

As I mentioned I don't recall the scene/s you are talking about off the top of my head and don't really feel like re-DLing the game just to find it but if its there then what you could do and is better practice is maybe specify the scene and point out why its bad, like maybe the blur was to close to the "focal point"/center of the animation and not in the background/edges enough and was overlapping with the characters drawing attention away from the "action" aka creating a distraction instead of reducing distractions which is the main point of blurring (as well as used to hide unwanted things/people in a scene or imperfections in a render) or the blur was to heavy so the dev should reduce it as both of these are quite common mistakes when using blur effects as well as having blur in the foreground of a render instead of the background of the render as you only really need to use a foreground blur effect in specific scenarios or portraits I guess.

 

[Cabin]

following thread
holy shit the renders look fucking gorgeous and the story premise looks interesting as well

 

[午夜之阳]

听我说！！！今年是2023年！！鹅城又可以收税了！！