I'm pleasantly surprised by the writing, on the whole. Your plot, character work, and dialogue are a welcome change from the status quo. Having said that;
"She sees you standing there and he quickly lowers his gaze." Unless there is another male in that bathroom, you need to pick a perspective and stick with it.
In the bar, the MC moves to the biker and proceeds to strike a pose with his foot on the wall, which I assume is meant to demonstrate casual dominance, and look "cool". What it actually is, however, is the tactically stupidest position he could possibly put himself in. Aside from multiple ways one's balance could be easily compromised, and the loss of all potential power-generation, he has exposed nerve clusters, his biggest artery, and his nuts. For how the MC has been portrayed, thus far, this is completely inconsistent with the character - given he is martially trained, and neither a showboat nor a fool.
