I have to agree with some others in this thread. There's hard that's well designed, fair and enjoyable to overcome and then there's hard that's just random, unfair and annoying. Your mod feels like more of the latter. The sex parts are great and so is some of the tuning done to the enemies, but the guaranteed grabs, RNG-based escape from rape and zero stamina on trap knockdowns are just simply unfun. It doesn't really make the game harder, but rather limits playstyles and makes you sigh every time you get grabbed because escaping is more of a chore than a part of a fun gameplay. Sometimes you get out on the first click and other times you go through 1-2 full animations, especially if the de-buff kicks in.
You compared this to Dark Souls, but those games have very little RNG-based difficulty and don't try to limit players' playstyles. Imagine if you would get the full damage from attacks every time you tried dodge-rolling too close to the enemy in Dark Souls. Most people would probably just play ranged or block builds and it's kinda how it is with this mod. I'm basically either standing still and blocking or just dodging backwards and attacking once or twice, rinse and repeat, with occasional dash above enemies' heads if there's space for that. Doesn't really feel harder, just more limiting.
If you really want that grab on dodge, then maybe something like a cooldown on multiple dodges through enemies would be better. You get one free dodge without grab and then x seconds cooldown. If you try dodging through that enemy during that cooldown you get grabbed. Limits the easy dodge spamming without disabling it completely. As for escape, maybe make it more about figuring out when to start mashing the button based on animation, like increasing the chance right before the insertion or when the enemy is changing position. This way players could learn when's the best moment to escape from every enemy instead of hoping for a good dice roll.
Anyway, it's your mod, so obviously you do you. I've played with it for a while and really enjoyed some of its parts but finally decided to remove it because of the issues I mentioned. Still, it's always awesome to see people making mods for the games you enjoy, so thanks for that.