assman1337

Well-Known Member
Mar 10, 2018
1,427
2,028
then make ur own he said he trying better with each update if u see past replies,dont discourage new creators if u have to be critical be in gud way so any newcomer can try again, instead just come and bash
just saying for others
so they know before downloading
 
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assman1337

Well-Known Member
Mar 10, 2018
1,427
2,028
no offence brother but i dont think "RUBBISH" is right word even though he keep saying he trying hard for well english content in previous replies, own think of prospective i think lets peace gud day
Although i have seen worse
it isn't decent though
what word wouldn't offend you ?
 
Oct 25, 2019
82
95
Although i have seen worse
it isn't decent though
what word wouldn't offend you ?
am not making anyone worse or anything i was just browing forum that day see this game comments i seen previous replies i seen your comment i not like 'THAT BASH IN STRAIGHTFORWARD RUBBISH ENGLISH' comment of yours. eventhough someone that devloper keep saying he try hard, so i just put my opinion and already put peace out on last comment because i not mean offend you may be thats your prospective to see things..thats it lets stop it here gud day ahead( may be i judge early i just put my opinion there)
 

LostOne84

Member
Mar 19, 2019
130
187
There are a lot of interesting situations in this game...but it definitely needs proof-reading by a native speaker. Will keep an eye on this one...good luck.
 

Sheppard3rd

Member
Jul 2, 2017
289
296
Ok we start with the bad parts English bad but really bad. probs not native speaker but i will advice for someone to check al those grammer issues.
second story dont make sense from the start i understand your school system layout thats not the problem but he is 18 why cant he stay alone at home while he was 4 years alone?
then there is the mother she is so happy that her son is coming back and when he is home she is gone? not even a warning or something? no terrible parent at best.
And now he needs to stay with his aunt who clearly 'hates' him also not mother of the year choice.
Then you are at the shower and she said come in and then its game over? weird.

The pro are the renders are pretty good i see that you put alot of time in it.
gonna wait for the next update.
and need a sandbox tag.
 
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EZ8lt

Engaged Member
Dec 24, 2019
2,457
5,386
Congratulations. With all these changes, you absolutely achieved nothing. Since you were in the very early stages of the game, it was a perfect chance to step back a little, look at what you have, throw away that horrendous script you made, and build it back up from the ground to something decent. Instead of that and change the bad parts (almost every aspect), you decided to try and justify the absolute bullshit that is the story. In addition to that, instead of dropping every nuance that the game had, slow rolling text, puting fucking dots after each other as a sentence, handling whole sentences as separate instead of one to give it a normal pace, you only toned down a little on them, so they still there. Well, good luck on the project, you'll need it.
 

Hans_

Member
Aug 13, 2017
239
299
The story is not belivable from the start.
MC comes home after 6(?) years away, they know he is coming home, still he comes home to an locked empty house not knowing what to do. The parents are away with his sister at a beauty pageant and they have had time to arrange for his cousin to pick him up at their house even though he lives 5 hours away. It's total BS that he didn't know this before going home.

I also think it's too short and ending it on the first interesting scene don't make me want to play the next update, it just makes the game annoying and I want to stay away. I also don't like the fact that they show off the females characters nude in dreams before you get there in the game.

Some will probably say: "why complain about something that is free". Because the dev needs feedback and there are lots of other free games to play. I also don't bother to get the life story of the dev, if he is a beginner or a veteran the feedback is the same.
 
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Macinnes

Active Member
Feb 19, 2020
784
794
"The game revolves around a university student who moved away from his home town in pursuit of higher education. During his time there, he shared rent with a couple of students and a local business owner. Fast forward several years later, our story begins, the protagonist returns home to reconnect with his landlady and her family."

Oh boy here we go again. Another new VN demo with incest as the main theme and an a horny M/C returning from Uni or some other generic place to cuck his father and fuck his entire family, neighbors, friends and co-workers. How about something original??? Me personally, I feel sorry for all the dads out there getting cucked by their Oedepus complexed sons. How about one where M/C and dad are Alpha males and spitroast mom while giving each other a high five LOL??? Have a truly incestual swinging family. Let sonny have his Oedipal thing while sis works out her daddy's girl issues. Then dad and M/C can swap Mom and Sis??? Finally to really raunch it up have dad impregnate sis and M/C knock up mommy! Of course I'm being just a bit facetious, but my point is be original please. Your title was clever enough for me to click on the link and have a look, but once I read the description and the forum replies I was less than enthused. Good luck with your project. I will pass for now and keep an open mind down the road. Cheers
 

Aelth

Member
Jun 17, 2017
124
386
Pro-tip; hit f1 to skip the annoying-as-fuck unskippable, minute long intro! I found it while mashing the keyboard in frustration.
 
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Swizzstick

Member
Apr 10, 2018
106
121
So....Aunt says come on in the door is unlocked when bringing her the towel, but you turned it into a game over after entering....
How am i supposed to trust you now???
 

FreshRevenge

Well-Known Member
Oct 17, 2019
1,071
2,574
Now when I was growing up. I lived with my parents when I was going to high school. I don't understand this idea that he turns 10 years old and he needs to leave home to go to high school? Most kids across the world live with their parents when they are in school.

I mean the mc looks like he is 17 or 18. I will have to say it just bad writing or logic.
 

eddie987

Well-Known Member
Dec 5, 2018
1,527
6,963
Yeah... The story still makes zero sense to me, so it wasn't the language barrier.

What's the point of starting a game building someone up as loving, caring and altruistic, just to show how she gives close to zero fucks for the main character? If she wasn't such an amazing person what would have changed? He'd have to stay somehwere alone? He already did that for 8 years! Big deal!

I'm curious what they were thinking when they left without even sending him a text. I guess something in the lines of:
"We'll show him how much we care about him by not only prioritising his si...roomate's local beauty pageant over his return after 8 whole years, but we won't even tell him in advance that no one is waiting for him and let him ring the doorbell like an idiot and wondering why no one is opening the door! And then we won't allow him to come over or even stay at his own house while we are away without any sort of explanation! Damn, we're so nice to him, he should start calling us loving and caring instead of landlord and landlady!"

And the whole:
"I won't let you stay in some boarding house, you've already been in one for 8 years during your schooling!"
was fucking hilarious! It was meant to be a joke, right? I mean, if she really cared... I don't know... she would be there waiting for him, when he returned home after so long?

But hey, his roomate sounded desperate and we all know that local beauty pageants are basically a matter of life and death! It's up there with going into a warzone equipped with a slingshot... I'm not even going to talk about the psycho aunt with the face tattoo who's holding an almost 10 year old grudge, over some underage wine drinking...

So... I guess I'm supposed to dislike every single female character from the game's banner, right? We haven't seen the sister (the landlady-tennant got old really fast...) yet, but if she's paricipating to pageants and her brother doesn't have a clue about it, she probably doesn't give a shit about him either.

I get that the dev wanted the game to start with the aunt for his own reasons, but he could do it in a way that wouldn't look like no one is really giving a fuck about the MC! I mean, we are not talking about him being away for a couple of months, it's been 8 whole years ffs and even if they had to go to his sister's pageant (which was a bullshit excuse), he could have just joined them wherever it's talking place!

He could have gotten home a week early to surprise them, only to find out they are not home or something, instead of looking like everyone doesn't give a crap about him, or at least they think some local pageant is more important than their child coming back home after 8 years!
 
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Watcher X

Active Member
Dec 26, 2017
756
2,364
After checking out the previews, this looks like a Milfy City clone. But without the clever writing, hot girls, engaging characters, fun game play, high quality artwork, high production values, next level sex scenes, snappy dialogue, sexy side characters, cougar mother, challenging puzzles, coherent story...........
 
2.30 star(s) 9 Votes