VN Ren'Py Abandoned Sorrow: Rebirth [v0.99] [LustFight]

[Kinch310]

It often happens xD

11 patrons, 25$ per month on Patreon. One subscriber on Subscribestar.

I appreciate how active you are here. But can you afford to be hostile to criticism?

The guy took the time to write out a review of your game. As it stands, you have had two people review your game negatively. And by the way, they both said something very similar. That the mistakes early on in your English writing were so glaring that it made playing the rest of the game feel like a chore. That's valuable feedback. I wrote my review days ago. I'm unsure who chose to report my review for being nonspecific (I listed ver batim misspellings and grammatical errors, FFS). But it got removed, so that's a nice reprieve for you.

Spelling and grammatical mistakes are not all that hard to correct. Why not take 15 minutes to put your script through Grammarly (it's free!) and make the suggested changes? Repost the game right after.

It seems to me that several people here have given you valuable and constructive criticism, and some of us even directly pointed you to resources that can help you make changes to make your game better. Seems like an opportunity to put your ego aside, use this as a learning opportunity, and take a long look at your creative process. Criticism hurts less when you're humble, open-minded, and willing to change. Don't be like me, it took me years to hit a bottom dark enough to truly accept feedback and implement changes to my life and routine. Humility isn't humiliation; it's accurate self-appraisal. Looks like you've got an excellent opportunity for personal and professional growth here! It might also be a good idea to reach out to one of the successful developers here and develop a relationship that allows for mentorship. That's what I did.

Good luck with your game.

 

[Samuel Hidayat]

11 patrons, 25$ per month on Patreon. One subscriber on Subscribestar.

I appreciate how active you are here. But can you afford to be hostile to criticism?

The guy took the time to write out a review of your game. As it stands, you have had two people review your game negatively. And by the way, they both said something very similar. That the mistakes early on in your English writing were so glaring that it made playing the rest of the game feel like a chore. That's valuable feedback. I wrote my review days ago. I'm unsure who chose to report my review for being nonspecific (I listed ver batim misspellings and grammatical errors, FFS). But it got removed, so that's a nice reprieve for you.

Spelling and grammatical mistakes are not all that hard to correct. Why not take 15 minutes to put your script through Grammarly (it's free!) and make the suggested changes? Repost the game right after.

It seems to me that several people here have given you valuable and constructive criticism, and some of us even directly pointed you to resources that can help you make changes to make your game better. Seems like an opportunity to put your ego aside, use this as a learning opportunity, and take a long look at your creative process. Criticism hurts less when you're humble, open-minded, and willing to change. Don't be like me, it took me years to hit a bottom dark enough to truly accept feedback and implement changes to my life and routine. Humility isn't humiliation; it's accurate self-appraisal. Looks like you've got an excellent opportunity for personal and professional growth here! It might also be a good idea to reach out to one of the successful developers here and develop a relationship that allows for mentorship. That's what I did.

Good luck with your game.

I don't know anything about the other review, but the only 1* review I've seen is very subjective and biased with little constructive criticism. Bombing the game because it has mind control and 'family in danger' is just weird.

 

[LustFight]

11 patrons, 25$ per month on Patreon. One subscriber on Subscribestar.

I appreciate how active you are here. But can you afford to be hostile to criticism?

The guy took the time to write out a review of your game. As it stands, you have had two people review your game negatively. And by the way, they both said something very similar. That the mistakes early on in your English writing were so glaring that it made playing the rest of the game feel like a chore. That's valuable feedback. I wrote my review days ago. I'm unsure who chose to report my review for being nonspecific (I listed ver batim misspellings and grammatical errors, FFS). But it got removed, so that's a nice reprieve for you.

Spelling and grammatical mistakes are not all that hard to correct. Why not take 15 minutes to put your script through Grammarly (it's free!) and make the suggested changes? Repost the game right after.

It seems to me that several people here have given you valuable and constructive criticism, and some of us even directly pointed you to resources that can help you make changes to make your game better. Seems like an opportunity to put your ego aside, use this as a learning opportunity, and take a long look at your creative process. Criticism hurts less when you're humble, open-minded, and willing to change. Don't be like me, it took me years to hit a bottom dark enough to truly accept feedback and implement changes to my life and routine. Humility isn't humiliation; it's accurate self-appraisal. Looks like you've got an excellent opportunity for personal and professional growth here! It might also be a good idea to reach out to one of the successful developers here and develop a relationship that allows for mentorship. That's what I did.

Good luck with your game.

You still haven't calmed down? You're scaring me.

I feel like I'm under the collective hypnosis of Astra Yanwang and I can't get out of it.

 

[Kinch310]

You still haven't calmed down? You're scaring me.

I feel like I'm under the collective hypnosis of Astra Yanwang and I can't get out of it.

Lol. Nobody is angry. If you decide to interpret my post that way, that's your business. It kills me to see somebody make the same mistakes I made--dismissing legitimate criticism--but maybe we all need to make these mistakes and face dark patches before we learn? I don't know. I have been giving you the benefit of the doubt this whole time; a courtesy you have not extended my way.

I still think you have an opportunity for personal and professional growth here. I've provided you feedback and resources publically and privately (after you messaged me in a rage over my review--thank you for apologizing, by the way). I hope you make the most of the opportunity, but most people who respond to their critics the way you do are destined to struggle. Some percentage of those people eventually learn, but most don't.

I mean this with 100% sincerity, I hope you experience the success you're working towards.

 

[LustFight]

Lol. Nobody is angry. If you decide to interpret my post that way, that's your business. It kills me to see somebody make the same mistakes I made--dismissing legitimate criticism--but maybe we all need to make these mistakes and face dark patches before we learn? I don't know. I have been giving you the benefit of the doubt this whole time; a courtesy you have not extended my way.

I still think you have an opportunity for personal and professional growth here. I've provided you feedback and resources publically and privately (after you messaged me in a rage over my review--thank you for apologizing, by the way). I hope you make the most of the opportunity, but most people who respond to their critics the way you do are destined to struggle. Some percentage of those people eventually learn, but most don't.

I mean this with 100% sincerity, I hope you experience the success you're working towards.

Man, how long can this go on? I wrote you that I don't think your criticism is objective; to me it's complete nonsense. You also tell me that if your sister is in danger, it's 1 star and NO NO NO NO. I wouldn't be surprised if that's a normal criticism for you.

Any other developer would have complained about you long ago or just ignored you, but I don't want to do that and just suggest you get off my back.

Understand: I am NOT interested in what you have to say.

Although I'd be surprised if you actually liked my game and are now making fun of me like you're Illusion, because that's how I perceive it. Like a really weird dream where I'm being followed by some crazy guy with his advice.

 

[razardkun]

Sorry, but the game still really bad even after ramake,and to make matters worse you still making the story with multi protagonists.And I have to agree with my friend from the review, the story continues Weird, confusing , and an overall bad presentation.
But good luck , your other game has a better future.

 

[Rockero_69]

I'm just playing it and it looks good, just like the previous images. I have 2 question: The 1 relationship this has with your other game Joy, because the same girl appears there Is Asian, or perhaps this is the reworking of Joy. The 2nd question is the male MC will relate to the female MC or will they be different paths

 

[Deleted member 3917737]

the male MC will relate to the female MC or will they be different paths

So, there is a Female Protagonist in this game? if so, the tag is missing.

 

[PopPop63]

I am not a native English speaker, so I can make mistakes in f95. I do not pretend to respond to messages in good English because I am from another country. A country that is VERY bad with that language.

And I have an editor who edits the text for the game, and if American sounds or seems strange to you, what can I do?

I am an American and it is really odd translation to me too. I am not sure where you got the editor ...

 

[Lyve]

Nice game! thanks

 

[Kinch310]

Below is the review I wrote that the Dev asked me to remove. Sister? What? When I felt bad for him and added an edit at the end and moved my rating from 1 to 3 stars, he reported the review and had it removed. I bent over backward, giving this guy the benefit of the doubt. Yeah, not anymore. I emailed the mods, we'll see, but my review will likely go back up. In case it doesn't, here it is. One star. I don't feel bad anymore.


First things first. The developer deserves credit and praise for his willingness to clean the slate and start fresh. That is the hardest thing to do as an artist and content creator. It's almost impossible not to be defensive and sensitive when our hard work is criticized. But this willingness to embrace criticism when it's fair is essential to success as a creator.

This is a remake of a game criticized primarily for its uninspired and clunky use of the English language. That's why I was disappointed to find a spelling error in the first sentence of the game. We recently attended "collge." Why our returning from college is essential to the story is unclear as of yet. (Dev, when you tell a story, be aware of Chekov's gun--every detail you take the time to mention should be meaningful. ESPECIALLY DETAILS IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO INCLUDE IN THE FIRST SENTENCE.) We return home and are confronted with a disturbing turn of events. People in our community have been disappearing.

This might horrify and cause enormous unease for you or me. For the MC? Old news. When his friend calls to warn him that the town has changed since he left (people occasionally vanish now), the MC reassures his friend that he's heard the news. Obviously?! What? Does his friend think he's an idiot? That would be like not having heard about "the covid." (Direct quote on the last part.)

My journey through the novel ended there. The Dev is adamant that he has used a professional translator and editor. Given the misspellings and awful writing in the first bit of dialogue, I have doubts about that.

It's a shame because the renders are great, and the idea of people mysteriously vanishing isn't a trope you often see on this site.

Unfortunately, the writing in this post has undergone closer editing than this game. And that isn't forgivable in a remake.

 

[7empest5teele]

WHY is there no walkthrough mod available for this?
It's the perfect creation to HAVE one in, so many choices,
which one does what, which path am I taking, these things are crucial!

 

[7empest5teele]

Uggh we have to CHOOSE the TITLE (why when its already written a specific way??) of Diana/ Sorrow when it's MIGHTY CLEAR what her title SHOULD be, and all throughout the rest of this, I get to talk to my BABY best friend, my SIBLING best friend, and best friend that seems to come up in every second SENTANCE, noooo why would the MC call her by...oh, I don't know...hmm HER ACTUAL NAME?

 

[LustFight]

Below is the review I wrote that the Dev asked me to remove. Sister? What? When I felt bad for him and added an edit at the end and moved my rating from 1 to 3 stars, he reported the review and had it removed. I bent over backward, giving this guy the benefit of the doubt. Yeah, not anymore. I emailed the mods, we'll see, but my review will likely go back up. In case it doesn't, here it is. One star. I don't feel bad anymore.


First things first. The developer deserves credit and praise for his willingness to clean the slate and start fresh. That is the hardest thing to do as an artist and content creator. It's almost impossible not to be defensive and sensitive when our hard work is criticized. But this willingness to embrace criticism when it's fair is essential to success as a creator.

This is a remake of a game criticized primarily for its uninspired and clunky use of the English language. That's why I was disappointed to find a spelling error in the first sentence of the game. We recently attended "collge." Why our returning from college is essential to the story is unclear as of yet. (Dev, when you tell a story, be aware of Chekov's gun--every detail you take the time to mention should be meaningful. ESPECIALLY DETAILS IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO INCLUDE IN THE FIRST SENTENCE.) We return home and are confronted with a disturbing turn of events. People in our community have been disappearing.

This might horrify and cause enormous unease for you or me. For the MC? Old news. When his friend calls to warn him that the town has changed since he left (people occasionally vanish now), the MC reassures his friend that he's heard the news. Obviously?! What? Does his friend think he's an idiot? That would be like not having heard about "the covid." (Direct quote on the last part.)

My journey through the novel ended there. The Dev is adamant that he has used a professional translator and editor. Given the misspellings and awful writing in the first bit of dialogue, I have doubts about that.

It's a shame because the renders are great, and the idea of people mysteriously vanishing isn't a trope you often see on this site.

Unfortunately, the writing in this post has undergone closer editing than this game. And that isn't forgivable in a remake.

How much you want to prove to someone XD

 

[ProtoJoto]

I really felt sorry for the poor cops at the police station. First they weren’t issued holsters, so they had to store their pistols internally, and pull them out of their ass when needed. Then the only ammo they had were some useless wildcat cartridges consisting of a 9mm case loaded with a rifle bullet: which would never fit in their guns. They seem to have resorted to just throwing the cartridges at the intruders--probably while yelling ‘Bang!’ loudly--so it is unsurprising that they all ended up dead. I think the 'Defund The Police' movement has gone too far.

 

[redv1per]

thanks

 

[Kotobiki]

Hmmm...

 

[tuShua]

So I'm guessing there's some kind of stat system on rel depending on your answers. So is standing your ground make Inferno more obedient and Listening to her more dominant/increase rel, or does it only have to do with outcomes of future events?

 

[LustFight]

So I'm guessing there's some kind of stat system on rel depending on your answers. So is standing your ground make Inferno more obedient and Listening to her more dominant/increase rel, or does it only have to do with outcomes of future events?

its only for future content

 

[tuShua]

WHY is there no walkthrough mod available for this?
It's the perfect creation to HAVE one in, so many choices,
which one does what, which path am I taking, these things are crucial!

oh my cow tits, relax dude, and just wait wtf I can understand to since I'm like in the blind. But either way you could always change the choices again once the walkthrough comes in