Hello
I just finished playing this version and i wanted to give you my personal opinion about it. I'll go over the points i believe could use some improvement.
1. Since it's not my native language i don't want to sound like a hypocrite and it has already been said before, but the english version really needs proofreading and rephrasing when characters speak together, to make it sounds more natural (i wouldn't mind if you kept using some spanish words or expressions like siesta etc..). It would help immersion and make the interactions more fluent. I literally facepalmed myself out of cringyness at the first line the mc blurted out when he got out of the train and engaged with the girls for the first time.
2. The writting needs way more consistency. For example, the cast is full of punks or bimbos with huge breast and ass, which translate into the mc commenting at each and every turn he gets in presence of them about "tits this" and "boobs that", it gets quickly repetitive for my taste and make me wonder if the real ape in the game is in fact the mc himself. Like the small scene with the french girl in the bus, where i noted at least 8 comments about her body and his growing boner. As a writter, you have to learn (and i know it's a hard trick) to provide some variety on how the mc thinks about it, not everything that goes through his mind needs to be explicitly blurt out loud for the reader. Otherwise you risk turning your mc into a simple minded creep. Try using more suggestive approachs when it comes to it. To help you, one thing you can definitely rely on are your renders since this part is well made. They can show and make feel a lot just by themselves (facial expressions, poses etc..).
3. My main critique on this version is the complete lack of decisions you can make or the strange ones you're asked about. Example, the restaurant where the landlady ask you to keep the price of your order at range and there you get to choose between three different meals with absolutely no idea about their price tag nor her reaction to it, you're left clueless about the real impact of your decision which apparently have no importance anyway there. And next, you did very good with the choice to reach or not to the singer, which this time is impactful and perfectly relevant. The worst part of the game for me is before you eat pizza with the "girl of your dream/next door" and you're forced into a 49 space/clicks after sending your order through your phone and just opening the door to peep on her. I would like to have a choice on this matter since the guy is supposed to keep a low profile or be sent back to his cell. Specially in comparison of how he lets Lucia threaten him after the "yoga" session (where there's also no choice in which part you want to partake). I want to be able to choose if the guy want to play it "more adventurous" (either on peeping on his crush, getting treated like a toy by older women and specially while standing his ground when facing his "ennemy") or if he wants to keep it slow and display a decent image of himself to others while his neck is on the line. I'd like a choice on how far i want to push things with the different member of the cast.
4. I find that sandbox and freeroaming rarely add much to the overall quality of a game except skyrocketing the number of useless space/clicks and breaking the natural flow of the story. I really think you should direct your game to the VN style, or kynetic if you keep with the lack of choices. There's already enough clicks to go through with the MC thoughts processing and chasing the ape through useless places was impacted because of this approach, even though it was still funny to see the results.
Okay done with the input on my critiques. I really hope you take it as constructive criticism and please realize i wouldn't even have taken the time to write it down if I didn't feel the potential fun your story could provide ! Big up for the size of your initial release, you put a lot of effort in it unlike most other devs do, there's already quite some content to go with ! I like the initial setting since i love Spain and the spanish culture/women and there is definitely a lot to tell from where you choosed to start your story.
(beside can you really find a restaurant serving food before 10pm and don't forget the existential concept of siesta which send whole town to sleep during the heat of the afternoon)
Keep improving you're on a good track !