I know story a bit all over the place. But afterall it's good. I think it just needs some additional content in some places to have the story be more consistent. And there needs to be build up toward important events to give more weight and importance to them. Perfect example would be the beginning in where there's a build up to Gail fucking Dave. It could show how desperate Gail truly is to get that promotion. And show the reasoning behind her choices.
Also giving the game meaningful choices. Right from the beginning. A great start would be. Does Gail decide to fuck Dave or not. if she decides not to fuck Dave. show the result of her actions. (Like her possibly not getting the job over cindy.) (Because logically Cindy should get the job. As the game suggests that she's better qualified then Gail.) (As a masters is higher than A Bachelors) Etc. Have the 2 paths be different.
There could be a chance that Gail wouldn't have to fuck Dave to get the job.
We are told Gail is both book smart and street smart. It could show how Gail plays mental chess with Dave. And slowly Dave corrupts her into fucking him. Or Dave becoming a simp. (I know alot of ppl wouldn't like that.)(and that's the beauty of having choices.(don't pick it)
Or because the good girl path is used more to tell the story then for the porn.
Have the good girl path show Gail doing her job and finding out that Dave is stealing money from the company and goes to Hugo and shows him what she found and he needs more proof to confront Dave.
(If Gail didn't get the promotion.) Meanwhile Cindy would be in Gail's place. And Gail and Cindy could still have one another and Gail could try and see if Cindy is working with Dave as a corrupt fuck or if she's just now "trapped" into doing whatever Dave wants. As a added bonus she could try to setup Cindy so Gail could get her job. Etc there are alot of ways it could be done.
I will probably add more to this later.
Also giving the game meaningful choices. Right from the beginning. A great start would be. Does Gail decide to fuck Dave or not. if she decides not to fuck Dave. show the result of her actions. (Like her possibly not getting the job over cindy.) (Because logically Cindy should get the job. As the game suggests that she's better qualified then Gail.) (As a masters is higher than A Bachelors) Etc. Have the 2 paths be different.
There could be a chance that Gail wouldn't have to fuck Dave to get the job.
We are told Gail is both book smart and street smart. It could show how Gail plays mental chess with Dave. And slowly Dave corrupts her into fucking him. Or Dave becoming a simp. (I know alot of ppl wouldn't like that.)(and that's the beauty of having choices.(don't pick it)
Or because the good girl path is used more to tell the story then for the porn.
Have the good girl path show Gail doing her job and finding out that Dave is stealing money from the company and goes to Hugo and shows him what she found and he needs more proof to confront Dave.
(If Gail didn't get the promotion.) Meanwhile Cindy would be in Gail's place. And Gail and Cindy could still have one another and Gail could try and see if Cindy is working with Dave as a corrupt fuck or if she's just now "trapped" into doing whatever Dave wants. As a added bonus she could try to setup Cindy so Gail could get her job. Etc there are alot of ways it could be done.
I will probably add more to this later.
