Hey man, I get that it's a self-defeating spiral. The more you promise to get work done, the more anxiety sets in over it and you feel like you can't work on it, and can't make yourself work on it. This disappoints people, and then you try to fix it the only way you feel like you can, by promising to do better- but then those promises just add to the anxiety that's paralyzing you in the first place.
It's rough, and I get that. Nergal, you made some pretty sweet games. They're almost universally liked and anticipated, and you can be proud of that. Personally, I think that A Zombie's Life, even barely finished, is one of the best games on this site.
Now let's look at some options here man. Urban Demons is pretty bogged down, but your overhaul added some quality content for sure. It sounds like you've got a plan for that, and you've got art for that. Maybe you should think about recruiting some people to help take the pressure off of you to delegate tasks to. Give them your notes and plans for scenes or areas and have them run some development before sending it in for you to compile and edit into the main game. Maybe talk to ChilliScholar and some of the guys over there, because they seem to be fairly familiar with the back end of the game, and eager to aid in development. You could probably recruit some people to contribute to the game. Hell, I'd help out where I could for free myself.
I know you're getting a lot of negativity around here, but it's not because you suck or because your games suck. You've just gotta figure out how to deliver on your promises, and you're gold. If it means delegating some work, then that's something you can make happen. Despite the negativity here, a lot of people have a lot of faith in how good your work is. You make good stuff man, and you can have some faith that if you put in the work, the result will be quality. Good luck, Nergal.