Ren'Py Completed Valdana: The Fall [v2.00] [Tjord]

[RemiliaScarlett]

the 2.0 yuria corruption/transformation is just the best "chef's kiss".

The plot is "meh"er than base one though (probably a matter of taste I guess but it adds variety, and variety is the spice of life).

TBH I feel like having the girls being in more dominating positions can be sexier than them being on the receiving end all the time (because they are too "obedient" I guess).

A story where you turn girls into corrupted bitches but then if you don't satisfy them one might barge in your room and ride you all night to satisy herself could be funny

On another hand a story where you turn girl into succubus and have them prey on villagers/adventurers and have scenes like the "widow" project could be really great (you could have femdom when they prey on the other people and maledom with the warlock/demon that is turning them).

Still sadly no hard abs (some athletic bodies here and there tho)

 

[corruptionenjoyer69]

I definitely liked this more. While the girls were robotic, they kept enough personality (especially when horny) that it was still really hot.

 

[Dremo]

Overall, compared to main route, more interesting transformations but slightly worse in most other parts.

I don't mind the new protagonist's personality, given the 2 protagonists from Isis and Valdana were too similar as cunning ugly bastards so it was kinda getting old... but it's true that it was weird to have this stoic and unlustful PoV when the appeal of the game is extreme sexual corruption. Maybe it was a deliberate decision as to limit the number of scenes to keep the alternate route shorter, which I would understand.

Still, I could play another dozen of similar expansions/new games and still be excited about seeing new corrupted forms, so this was still awesome to get through once again.

 

[Anelways]

The dronification thing was indeed a breath of fresh air since Tjord hasn't done it before in his games, if only Audrey and Yuria got the same treatment. While the Yuria end scene was great, demonic/succubus-like transformation I feel, came out of nowhere though I guess its the Viscount's kink or preference since Audrey got it as well.

 

[dirichilhet]

Firstly, I'm genuinely thankful to Tjord for providing us with a meatier update instead of just one containing a bonus scene and gallery. You seriously didn't need to, and it was a pleasant surprise to receive the update this early. I'll try to save some money and support you on itch when the month ends.

Secondly, my alternative route review (will also try to update my original review later): It was interesting and effectively fulfills the role of an alternative route, introducing different ideas and expanding the Isis/Valdana universe. However, I don't believe it reaches the same level as the original route, or even Isis. This could be because some of my personal preferences were less present (what have you done to my beloved Cassandra cow udders ) but I also feel that certain general storytelling aspects were less developed compared to the main route.

The POV of a pragmatic MC contrasts well against the lechery of the previous, but in an erotic fiction, I think this did worse for the story. We got to explore much less the new transformations (both in body and in psychology) and sex became much more of a physiological burden for the MC and girls, instead of a luxurious act of servitude from the slaves to their master. Simply, there was much less sex appeal.

The quicker transformations also did not help in that aspect. One of the most enjoyable aspects for me in Isis and original Valdana is the teasing before the transformation is completed. It's almost a sadistic felling: you've cornered your prey and are slowly approaching them while savoring their eyes still filled with empty hope; they still struggle against or refuse to accept defeat, while your mind is already racing, imagining how they will look after the grotesque transformation. With the quick modifications, this foreplay is still there sometimes, but much less prominent.

Speaking about the transformations, it's nice to see the gyarus back! You've effectively made the transformation reflect the MC's main objective: all of them retained their intelligence and became much more pragmatic towards Neo-Terran plans; they are primarily soldiers and then sex-slaves. This makes the changes to the transformations verisimilar, since a soldier with humongous badonkers will not fulfill their mission with peak athleticism, but for me, this also weakens the sex appeal of the story. The idea of giving a slave chronic back pain and mobility issues, rendering them useless for anything other than suck cock - just because you made their breasts too big - is simply too appealing to me. But again, personal preferences, I don't think this was the route's objective anyway.

This brings me to the thing that made the route worthwhile: Yuria, a very creative transformation with a very hot transformation scene. It's nice to see you exploring with more imaginative transformation scenes (not just get into the machine -> get out of the machine -> boom, sexy lady) and different gimmicks to them. I believe you've also managed to control well the flow for when to utilize this creativity. Saving the best for last is powerful, and it helped the story reach a more likable ending (I still think it's inferior to the main route, but good nonetheless). This change of how the transformation is handled makes me even more excited about your future works , I would 100% still love them if they just stuck with the formula, but changes like that are welcome!

Despite my criticisms, I'm happy that I got to experience Valdana again (and for free!!). I can't stress enough how fortunate we are to have a developer deliver high-quality (completed!!) games when we have a sea of feature-creeped ones that are never going to be finished floating on this site. I hope that Tjord had as much fun making this VN as I had playing it. I'm very excited for whatever comes next. (just make sure to add a girl that gets humongous tits plz ;-;)!

 

[Lynx123]

As a DLC I think this was done mostly well, the story went in a new direction (which I believe is the right choice), Adamas held the advantage 90% if the time. Personally, I am not a fan of NTR (specifically when the partner is involved) or ugly MCs, so the Yuria scene was good but also not ideal and Adamas was an improvement visually.

I wish that in future games/scenes that there is more variety in fashion, such as accessories or progressively more revealing/lewd clothes/lingerie, fully nude scenes can get somewhat stale for me. In Valdana and Isis, the girls are transformed to the MCs' taste, maybe a corruption mechanic that unlocks their true self/hidden fetishes, allowing a variety of looks could help your next game stand out.

However, I understand these are my personal desires and Tjord might not be interested in such a direction.

 

[Haamster]

I agree with most of the comments here; the droneification is done well but isn't to my taste.

That being said I am incredibly appreciative of the fact that Tjord is using the :The Fall series to try out different variations of brainwashing/mind control. Mind control is my biggest kink but I also get really picky about it, and while I can't say that any of Tjord's games are my favorite each game from him shows a growth in skill and demonstrates a willingness to try something new.

One thing I'd like from future games would be more time spent in the partially corrupted forms, and a "sleeper agent" transformation, where there are no major changes visible with clothes on (yes Yoona was my favorite)

 

[Haamster]

I would like to request for a walkthrough/guide. If possible, please pin to the first page of this forum.

This is mostly a kinetic novel, there is no way to mess up

 

[Prinplup]

I too, like to rub my duck



Almost every paragraph has a typo or grammatical error; would love to see a minor update to fix them

 

[foofoo3344]

This is mostly a kinetic novel, there is no way to mess up

Yeah, found that out just now

 

[vs2011xyz]

New Android port. Nothing too fancy but let me know if you have any issues.

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[kzk0987]

I finished the alternative route.

I liked it. I think it's a bit unfair trying to measure it up to the main game because it's shorter and meant as a what-if scenario in the first place, of course it's not as well-developed. Tjord always made it clear it was about 70% of the length of the original route.

Now, my thoughts:

I like how it gives insight to another sides of the personalities of several characters, as well as giving expanded roles to characters who don't get much or are enslaved early in the original. This is the best way to approach an alternate route. I like the new protagonist Adama and disagree with the people saying he doesn't have an interest in sex, he clearly does but suppresses it when he judges it will be detrimental to the mission. Which I can see why it may be frustrating but like I said before, it's a nice change of pace from Villers, it's important to have the two protagonists be different from one another. He does get into it when he's involved in a sexual act.

For the brainwashing, the Commissars (and the Auxilia) look amazing, but I feel like personality-wise they're stuck between two different paths. I'd prefer if either they became fully "dronefied", more cold and obedient, OR more evil and free-thinking with more defined personalities. The way it was done it feels stuck in the middle. I understand story-wise this is the nature of the Inquisitors, and it works well within the narrative, it's just that as mind control/corruption erotica I think one of the extremes would be more satisfying than this murky middle ground.
The "Widows" in the end were very nice, no complaints there. That conversion scene is one of my favorite scenes in the whole game.

And since I'm talking about it, I don't mind the single-session Brainwashing sessions because they have a completely different purpose. In the original it's supposed to be covert and not call attention to it, that's why it's several sessions. Here, stealth is not a concern. So I'd rather have it done quickly than try to drag it out just to preserve the formula the previous two stories established. Different kinds of brainwashing processes for different narrative needs.

The story was simple and didn't bother me. I liked the beginning but the more it became mostly about battle logistics the less it held my interest. I'm more into political intrigue and stealth missions/espionage side of things. There were still many parts of it I liked - anything to do with Yuria,

Spoiler: Near end game spoilers

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I just didn't care for the constant status reports on who was gaining and losing ground once the fight got to the ground (while they were in space the battle part was entertaining because Tjord writes space battles as more of a battle of wits).

Also, the bonus scene of the original route was great. I always felt the game missed a Victorica and Yuria threesome.

Thanks for the great work Tjord. Valdana is my favorite of your games and the update added a couple more scenes I'll be coming back to. I'm looking forward to whatever you cook up next, and hope that someday you return to the "Fall" setting for another story.

 

[Addictions]

It's interesting to see the reception on this.

The new path really wasn't to my tastes at all, but apparently some people are really into it. Though there does seem to be a general 'meh' on the battle reports.
There's some bits I liked:

• The Doctor getting a new model, and some clean-up in the scenes of the first route are a big plus.
• The transformation sequence of Yuria at the end is very good (though I hate the blueberry she turns into frankly) because there's somewhat of a personality and character involved that isn't just "go in box without any fanfare".
• Some of the models of the new transformations are good.

The bad:

• The story is too distant from the characters. You're zoomed out too much and don't really have any chance to get acquianted with the characters or even empathize with them much. The protagonists and his helpers are impersonal and distant. The battles are described but without really any emotion or passion or consequence.
• the Inquisitor is a boring character without any personality. You may disagree, but he's incredibly boring. He's like one of those mind control erotica protagonists that gets powers and immediately never leaves the house, stays away from all windows, trains all his slaves in Krav-Maga and only takes the most logical approach, etc... Very boring and silly to read about, less an erotic fantasy and more a doomsday prepper fantasy, which is also wish-fulfillment but of a very different kind.
• the post-drone transformation characters have more personality than him and even they are muted. There's just, nothing there. No bits shining trough, only those faked for manipulation value.
• The battle reports and, frankly, unnecessary, percentages and EFFICIENCY are bothersome and don't really matter. If I'm reading The Expanse or other hard Sci-fi, I might be interested in this, but I'm not. I don't really care about how steely-helmed the admiral is, I don't really care what the percentages of success are because they're always low but we'll always beat them anyway. If they tell you it's dangerous, and unlikely to succeed and yet nothing bad ever happens and you always succeed I'm thinking that frankly you're just bad at math and should re-evaluate why you're even using these types of percentages ("Umm actually poster, 13% chance of success doesn't mean they can't succeed, you don't know how percentages work. And furthermore..." shut up Nerd, nobody cares. The character has a 100% success rate on every mission so it doesn't matter. Maybe this is like Caesar writing about conquering the Gauls: They were really tough, making me look even tougher for having beaten them.)
• There's no challenge or pressure or even danger for the protagonist character, making it a bit of a "look-at-how-cool-my-OC-of-Stukov-is"-wank. Everyone also always needs to mention how strong and mighty and powerful and unkillable the protagonist is. (Careful lady, he's got sixthousand layers of steel and could kill everyone else in the room!) The tacticool wank is also kind of silly. If there's no challenge or opposition, there's hardly any fun in the story. I imagine if the protagonist was surrounded with all the cannons of the alliance pointed at him, he'd push back his anime glasses and go "tsssccchk, just as keikaku" and then unleash his megazord form and spitibombs the planet or something equally silly while flying off into space using rocketboots. (again hyperbole here, but that's the vibe I get)
• There's far too many sequences where there's on screen murder, or where troops surrender and then they still make a point out of it to murder everyone that surrendered (I think this happens at least twice for god knows what reason). Why? I imagine this helps some people masturbate, but it's a strange direction to take so many times and so explicitly compared to the previous game-routes.
• The whole fun of seeing the changes play out or having consequences are removed by taking the characters away from the intrigue. The whole fun of the previous route was putting an underdog in a hostile environment and working around that, here there's no hostile environment. The protagonist is in charge of his surroundings, the opposition stands no chance and barely puts up a fight. They're always safe and there's no consequences to anything, the protagonist always has the power in every scene.
• The big one for me is the sexlessness. It's ok that it's shorter, It's ok that there's less chances of sexual interaction but there's oodles and oodles of dialogue about battles and space ships and laserbeams and murder murder murder, you're telling me that those things are essential but actual erotic dialogue or hints at sexuality somehow couldn't fit into the whole thing? It's so goddamn sterile. And if you see the screenshots I posted above, even when there's sex we have to take explicit mention that the protagonist isn't into it and declines, like Leon on a fucking jetski.
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  The ratio of battle-wank to actual wank is too skewed, you can easily get this amount of horny from 70's and 80's Sci-fi if you're so inclined.

Overall I'm happy it's out and I'm happy some people enjoyed it, I don't mean to disregard the work Tjord put into this or denigrate the achievement of pushing this out. It's not for me, and it's a huge dissapointment compared to the previous two storylines.

 

[Addictions]

I liked it. I think it's a bit unfair trying to measure it up to the main game because it's shorter and meant as a what-if scenario in the first place, of course it's not as well-developed. Tjord always made it clear it was about 70% of the length of the original route.

Why is that unfair? Is there some kind of law against comparing routes in the same game?
And even if it is shorter, you're allowed to critisize the allocation of resources of the shorter path. I'd honestly like to see a comparison of text to the original route and then see how much of the 'shorter' route is superfluous space-battle statistics that frankly don't matter.

I like the new protagonist Adama and disagree with the people saying he doesn't have an interest in sex, he clearly does but suppresses it when he judges it will be detrimental to the mission.

My D&D character totally has a deep backstory, he's the prince of a nation and has parents that he lost and he's trying to buy an orphanage for... Oh when does that show up in the game? Oh it doesn't really, he takes pills to supress anything interesting happening to him.
do we see him taking these pills or struggling with this repression then?
No not really, this all happens off screen and we don't really see any of that.
So he just...doesn't engage with his background?
Nope, but he REALLY wants to and sort of does when forced to by the story.
Cool, cool, so basically you have no backstory?

If it doesn't show up in the game or the story you have no backstory. If the character doesn't want to engage in sex and is shown actively avoiding it unless it's imperative to the success of the mission but never realyl examining it beyond mild curiosity, there is no or barely any sexuality. Dumbledore isn't gay unless it's in the text or can be deduced from the text, no matter what J.K. Rowling says in tweets.

Which I can see why it may be frustrating but like I said before, it's a nice change of pace from Villers, it's important to have the two protagonists be different from one another. He does get into it when he's involved in a sexual act.

Why is that important? Are we meeting some sort of quota here? It's good that the protagonist in my erotic story isn't interested in sex! That's a positive thing? I bet Agatha Christie sort of went "my last murder-mystery has a detective that WANTED to solve the case and was interested in uncovering it all, but how about we now do a detective that isn't really interested in mysteries or puzzles, I bet my audience will love that!". It's fun as a novelty, but I wouldn't say it's good or even necesarry. Maybe next route we can put in Mr. Bean or Paddington as protagonists, we haven't had those yet! What wonders will occur when they're forced to engage in sexual hijinks!
Variety for the sake of variety isn't inherently good, necesarry or important. Also: why the fuck was there even a need for a different protagonist? Why was that important?

And since I'm talking about it, I don't mind the single-session Brainwashing sessions because they have a completely different purpose. In the original it's supposed to be covert and not call attention to it, that's why it's several sessions. Here, stealth is not a concern. So I'd rather have it done quickly than try to drag it out just to preserve the formula the previous two stories established. Different kinds of brainwashing processes for different narrative needs.

You're also sort of glossing over that this is the explicit direction the author chose to take this story, it's easy to justify the transformations NEEDING to be this way because of the direction of the story, but the direction of the story could have necesitated something else entirely.

The story was simple and didn't bother me. I liked the beginning but the more it became mostly about battle logistics the less it held my interest. I'm more into political intrigue and stealth missions/espionage side of things. There were still many
...
I just didn't care for the constant status reports on who was gaining and losing ground once the fight got to the ground

This we agree on.

 

[wiseold6996]

How to play 2.0? The new game starts the old version

 

[Anelways]

How to play 2.0? The new game starts the old version

You can choose the alternative route after the Audrey fall.

 

[Lynx123]

After having some time to think about it, I would have preferred if Adamas got more interested in sex as the story goes on and he eventually embraces his "hormonal inbalance" it is a porn game after all, it also might solve the issue of a bland MC for some.

The point about the MC barely struggling at all... I will just chalk it up to author's choice. For the people who wanted/expected the DLC to have a similar plot to the OG route (Underdog MC surrounded by enemies gradually beating the odds and coming out on top in the end), I would argue that a new story would have been better for such a story and that you are missing the point of it being a DLC. I totally understand that feeling like the MC earned the sex scenes is an important point for some, it also improves the experience for me. However, I believe Tjord wanted to write a story different from the the OG route and experimented with this DLC... it definitely could be better but I enjoyed it nonetheless, I'm not that picky and can enjoy the story for what it is. I think Tjord wrote himself into a corner by emphasizing the cyborg side of the characters, thus he felt the need to throw out the percentages as their preferred way of communicating to somewhat show the influence the cybernetic enhancements has on them.

If anything, the grammar and spelling mistakes trigger me more XD. I would prefer to see titles like Lieutenant be represented as "LT." as opposed to "lt."

 

[Tansun]

New update reminded me a bit of Warhammer 40k.

 

[foofoo3344]

I think there should be a harem ending

 

[kzk0987]

Why is that unfair? Is there some kind of law against comparing routes in the same game?
And even if it is shorter, you're allowed to critisize the allocation of resources of the shorter path. I'd honestly like to see a comparison of text to the original route and then see how much of the 'shorter' route is superfluous space-battle statistics that frankly don't matter.



My D&D character totally has a deep backstory, he's the prince of a nation and has parents that he lost and he's trying to buy an orphanage for... Oh when does that show up in the game? Oh it doesn't really, he takes pills to supress anything interesting happening to him.
do we see him taking these pills or struggling with this repression then?
No not really, this all happens off screen and we don't really see any of that.
So he just...doesn't engage with his background?
Nope, but he REALLY wants to and sort of does when forced to by the story.
Cool, cool, so basically you have no backstory?

If it doesn't show up in the game or the story you have no backstory. If the character doesn't want to engage in sex and is shown actively avoiding it unless it's imperative to the success of the mission but never realyl examining it beyond mild curiosity, there is no or barely any sexuality. Dumbledore isn't gay unless it's in the text or can be deduced from the text, no matter what J.K. Rowling says in tweets.



Why is that important? Are we meeting some sort of quota here? It's good that the protagonist in my erotic story isn't interested in sex! That's a positive thing? I bet Agatha Christie sort of went "my last murder-mystery has a detective that WANTED to solve the case and was interested in uncovering it all, but how about we now do a detective that isn't really interested in mysteries or puzzles, I bet my audience will love that!". It's fun as a novelty, but I wouldn't say it's good or even necesarry. Maybe next route we can put in Mr. Bean or Paddington as protagonists, we haven't had those yet! What wonders will occur when they're forced to engage in sexual hijinks!
Variety for the sake of variety isn't inherently good, necesarry or important. Also: why the fuck was there even a need for a different protagonist? Why was that important?



You're also sort of glossing over that this is the explicit direction the author chose to take this story, it's easy to justify the transformations NEEDING to be this way because of the direction of the story, but the direction of the story could have necesitated something else entirely.



This we agree on.

How about we calm the fuck down a little.

Also, I agree we could have gotten something completely different, I was just judging it on the basis of what we got.
And I do not dislike what we got.

I think there should be a harem ending

Now this is a sentiment I do share. I've been wishing for a harem ending since the original game. Feels like one of the endings where Fritz takes over Valdana should have a harem scene somewhere.
The bonus scene with Victorica and Yuria does mitigate that need somewhat because oyakodon is the second best thing.