VN Ren'Py Angel & Demon [v0.1] [Saint]

[2MoshPit]

It's your game, and you've probably already planned what comes next. But in my subjective opinion, the whole karma and angel/demon stuff is needed by the game like a fifth wheel. It would be a shame if this great start to the story were just thrown in the garbage. I think that the man's intervention in the bathroom scene was the right decision; it prevented the main heroine from falling too quickly. And further corrupting the girl would be even more exciting. But it looks like that's not going to happen anymore. Yeah, there's probably something else interesting coming up, but it's still disappointing.
And what I did not like is the black textbox, yes there is a key H, but it would be better to see both text and scene. Unfortunately, it's hidden and can not be manually changed.

- for "your" textbox (thanks to Penfold Mole @ F95zone):

 

[swbfvd]

Wow I love the main character

 

[R1k0]

Put this file into the /game sub-folder to remove the textbox. Works for pretty much all renpy games.

It looks good, and the text is easily readable, even on a white background.

 

[2MoshPit]

I must say this is a very good start for a game like this - but (I know: there's always a 'but'):
I'm very dissapointed that there's no more BBC-Content and the fact, that the breast implants are planned towards the (almost) end of the game, too.
But hey:
it's your game, right? The story is good.

best regards

 

[Wilwock]

Veronica is written like she lived in an Amish community until a day ago. There's not being corrupt, then there's being an 80 IQ dumbass who can't puzzle out why you'd touch something that feels good lol

 

[Wilwock]

Also, bizarre choice to revolve the intro around something that won't even be present later on. You're going to attract people who want what you're not making, and not the people who'll want whatever it'll actually contain.

 

[Enlight432]

It's planned for at least 2 characters :

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The MC also

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but it will remain a minor fetish concerning her.

I hope you add the relationship between MC and her brother as well

 

[R1k0]

reminds me of Zoe's Temptations a little

What a terrible game! If this game is going to be like that too, with all the schizophrenic stuff and long conversations with imaginary characters, it's going to be awful.

 

[DashaTaran]

can we have corruption path and pubes at the same time?

 

[dolfe67]

Veronica is written like she lived in an Amish community until a day ago. There's not being corrupt, then there's being an 80 IQ dumbass who can't puzzle out why you'd touch something that feels good lol

Yeah it's the "naive conservative girl becoming a slut" trope, but she's a bit too naive for being with her boyfriend for 6 years. It was laughable she never touched her bf's dick. I can believe she never had an orgasm though, but I bet she doesn't even know what it is.

can we have corruption path and pubes at the same time?

At the start yes, but later on she'll shave, said the dev.

 

[Prokopije]

Hello. how much freedom of choice? Kinetic fuckfest or players actually have options to choose with whom she'll have sex?

 

[Jakakakakaoaoq]

Looks good, but will wait for few updates to play

 

[cloudstrife]

Not easy to implement in reality, I'd have to do all the renders where there's a naked character in double and some parts of the story that rely on this pilosity would no longer make sense. (She's supposed to shave later in the Corrupted Route).

This hairiness is there to emphasise the fact that she's natural and rather innocent sexually speaking (she doesn't attach much importance to it). This may change depending on the choices she makes later on.

Oh yeah Veronica is definitely sexually naive and sheltered, that's for damn sure lol

 

[cloudstrife]

Oh, I thought it meant British Broadcasting Corporation. Couldn't resist.

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Yeah right there with you on that one, always pops into my head when I read BBC, oh it's done it again lol

 

[cloudstrife]

I assume/hope we'll get to see Veronica pop her anal cherry on some routes?

 

[Kitiuuu]

now it is clear why she will go left, her boyfriend has a small one and gg has a girl, is she still a virgin?

 

[Kitiuuu]

as I understand it, when a girl wakes up in the morgue, she is given 2 ways of a demon or an angel for the entire passage of the game ?

 

[Skylark21]

as I understand it, when a girl wakes up in the morgue, she is given 2 ways of a demon or an angel for the entire passage of the game ?

Not really, you can choose pure and corrupt choices upto certain point in the game after which you'll be locked in either pure or corrupted route.

 

[grumpyoldcat]

Thank you, the corruption route will include an evolution to a more dominant Veronica towards Nathan, their relationship will undeniably change as she becomes more and more corrupt. But their relationship won't be exclusive if that's ever what you wanted to know. For it to remain exclusive between them, it would be better to stay on the pure road (where she could become pro active in bed with Nathan, without it reaching femdom in the strict sense of the word).



Thank you for the review, it doesn't seem to be the game for you from what I'm reading.

I'm not a very creative person (in the sense of coming up with story ideas), so I took inspiration from other content I've seen in the past. My main job is as a developer, which may explain why the story isn't much more in-depth than that.

I live in Europe and my ancestors are literally Italian, I have family with blue eyes and blond hair (me included) and others with brown hair and brown eyes.
That's just a detail for me, although I can understand your point of view. If it's something that a lot of people pick up on, it could change pretty easily (Helena's ancestors were Swedes who immigrated to Greece, and later her parents chose to live in the US. I admit that historically it seems less plausible than Italians migrating en masse to the US, but that's just a detail, isn't it ?).

For the baby name it's not explained in the game (it will be later) but it's a clumsiness on Sarah's part :

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The whole thing with BLM is satire. It's not to be taken seriously and won't be used again in the rest of the game.

In regards to losersriot, you don't have to give that tool the time of day. They do this same shit on several other threads.

 

[Saint_RNG]

no mommy lesb incest?

Perhaps a little on the corrupted side, the mother is almost as sexually inexperienced as the MC.

can we have corruption path and pubes at the same time?

There may be a sub-route in the corrupted route where Veronica refuses bimbofication and prefers to keep her body as it is (as can be seen with certain porn actresses who prefer to remain natural).

Yeah it's the "naive conservative girl becoming a slut" trope, but she's a bit too naive for being with her boyfriend for 6 years. It was laughable she never touched her bf's dick. I can believe she never had an orgasm though, but I bet she doesn't even know what it is.

The plot is deliberately exaggerated, especially for our times. I doubt there are still many young women in the West as uneducated, sexually speaking, as Veronica. I set it up to create a big contrast between the beginning and the end.

Hello. how much freedom of choice? Kinetic fuckfest or players actually have options to choose with whom she'll have sex?

I'd say somewhere in between, she won't be able to fuck everyone (especially within her family if that's what you're implying) but there will still be choices.

I hope you add the relationship between MC and her brother as well

It wasn't initially planned but maybe I'll add a few scenes about it (nothing serious, they won't end up in love if that's what you're expecting). The twins are very "separate" characters in the story, their story focuses solely on their relationship or on characters outside the family.

I assume/hope we'll get to see Veronica pop her anal cherry on some routes?

Yes (even though anal is a genre I don't really like).