I don't think anyone is a bad guy here. Just different perspectives.
moonhowler1972 is clearly against domestic abuse. Everyone agrees that men abusing women is wrong.
Karamba believes in self-defense if absolutely necessary. That women are not exempt from retaliation if they do evil.
azz111 states that women are moral agents, and their abuse should not be treated with kid gloves. Again, their evil should not be tolerated.
All the above is true. It's not easy to judge. There are so many variables in every situation.
Being a DIK, has so many variables that affect situations in the game. DIK or CHIK status. Past decisions. etc
Real life is way more complicated with many more variables. Best not to judge one another so easily. Respect each other's perspective, learn, and move on. I vote for peace and salutations to all.