My personal problems with this version:
The choices or lack thereof and a lack of the consequences thereof: As I wrote before, at least in Pen&Paper, one of the sins the DM can commit is to take away the player's autotomy over their own character and their choices. In small portions it CAN be okay narratively, but you shouldn't overdo it. I'm not one to condemn linear games, on the contrary, I think linear games are more enjoyable because it's easier to follow a thread (both as a player and as a developer). A no go is the Railroad storyline, where there is effectively no decision and the player is just a mute spectator and doesn't make any decision that is somehow relevant. For a scenario that deals with events that happened in the past and that are unknown to the MC and the player it is fine, however that is not the case here. The last version did a relatively good job with the twins' subplot, though I think at least the twins' encounter with the MC could have been inserted into the main game. With the escalation in the current version, it seems more like "what would have happened if we had stuck with the actual plot?" alternate version to me.
From a teacher who felt guilty because a student killed herself and could professionally turn down advances, we are now at an MC who is still a teacher, but mounts almost everything that is not on the trees by three. I don't know if the baseball bat caused a concussion that shifted his moral compass south but this is more of a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde scenario of character development.
My thoughts on how to save this version, which is already a train wreck:
1. give the player choices that carry weight. At the gas station alone, the whole guessing game is rather a waste of time when it comes to the scene in the restroom. Just as well the scene could have gone like this, " She: Sex? MC: LUL, k." and it wouldn't have changed anything about the course of events. Giving the player the option to say no would therefore have been a neat option.
2. the scene at the motel: instead of an unknown girl, for example, the MC could have happened to hear the voice of one of his students. Since we already know that the twins' parents are dubious, that wouldn't have been so surprising. Again, if then with optional sex.
3. the fist punch against the niece. If I remember correctly, the MC said something like "Don't worry, I know how to deal with little monsters" in an earlier version. So now we know what he meant by that. Seriously, if he has such a fragile ego as a teacher that such silly insults from his niece (!), who either has emotional problems or feelings for her uncle, make him lose control like that, then he is absolutely unfit for his profession and should think about another professional career. The scene, and there I join others is absolutely unnecessary. And if it should be a little more violent, then the niece simply spanked. Freely according to the motto: Beware of what you wish. It could come true, but differently than you think.
I don't know if and how the dev can save this update, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
Edit: Small update to make my sentence structure in the third point make more sense.