Mods decided to abuse their power.
Catch it while its hot. Nazi's gonna be stomping the boot on posts now too.
Art 2 Stars
1. Character Designs 1 Point (To each his own.)
- Rose - basic but that hairdo makes her look like she should topple over any moment. It makes her face look terrible in close ups as it disproportions her face with such a slant you swear she was leaning.
- Mark - Nothing special
- Karen - Milf but closer to GILF, If she kept her mouth shut would be more attractive.
- Kelly - Blondie but not a hottie? Pass
- Jessica - a solid 5.
- Alice - Student A.
- Mary - Student B.
- Lucy - Student C? Unremarkable lesbian. Never thought that would be a thing in this game.
- Bishop - My man looking good. Too bad he doesn't have anything else.
- Tony - Who?
- Natasha - Best Girl. But that's not saying much when compared to the rest.
Not enough variety or stand out models.
2. Render Quality 3 Points
Lighting is good in most instances. Posing is ok in most circumstances with a few render's needing a touch up with regards to eyes and positioning.
3. Animations 3 Points
Passing. Can hitch a little bit but computer/coding varies.
Gameplay 3 Stars
No Gameplay issues. No Innovations. 3 Points.
Choices and Consequences. 2 Points
"Order the Chicken. (Barf)"
OR
"Avoid the chicken. (Blowjob)":
A very reasonable choice!
Confused? See Below.
Story -5 Stars
1. Plot 0 Points
"Coomer-19"
A terribly written idea with a parody of modern life? But lets throw some half baked supernatural elements in with some glitches to make it seem more interesting? Unfortunately that just makes it more confusing as you are left wondering what the reality is for this world. Are we supposed to be clued into Karen's schemes or interested in this pedantic execution of a virus. This plot doesn't know if it wants to lean into the mystical or stay grounded in the physical. What results is a blend of underdeveloped scenes with a focus less on what the characters are doing and more on what we actually understand.
2. Dialogue -2
"Is your cock sad?"
The dialogue between characters is either completely bland or utterly nonsensical.
(The below is from the first pivotal scene between our MC, Rose, and her soon to be mother-in-law, Thornberg. I didn't change a single character.)
Rose "I don't see why not. Those girls need me to guide them. Mark will be doing most of the work at our business anyways. I will help him out when I have some spare time. Fate decides who comes into our life. Our hearts decide who stays."
Thornberg"That is wonderful, I would hate to lose you. You are very valuable to me. I feel like someone or something has been watching over you, helping guide you. Hopefully it is an angel, and not a demon."
Rose"Even angels have their demons. Our minds sometimes see what our hearts wish were true."
Thornberg "You speak like a poet. I couldn't have put it better myself."
Rose "I was simply paraphrasing a student with that line. Sometimes I feel like I learn more from them than they do from me."
Thornberg"You are simply being modest. I know you do amazing things for these girls. You are wise beyond your years. You are always so delightfully elegant, a true charmer giving the best advice."
Thornberg "Can you believe Bishop hired Natasha? Of all the candidates for a secretary he chose her, my son's ex. I am seriously considering firing her."
Rose "If you don't stop it will make me blush. I just do the best I can with what I have got, and I'm sure Natasha would land on her feet if we terminate her."
Now imagine there is more.
3. Characters -3 Points
MC "I'm Vegan."
Player "..."
MC "I guess you didn't hear me."
Player "..."
MC "I'M VEGAN!"
Player "SHUT UP!"
Rose is the worst main character I have every had the displeasure of playing. She is preachy, pedantic, nonsensical, insensitive and downright incomprehensible. If given the chance she literally spells out the prologue by breaking the 4th wall. What is worse is that she does a wonderful job of narrating her life. Without a single image of the actions she is reminiscing about. I thought I wanted to get into her head but the next 10 minutes made me reconsider. She wavers between being completely motivated and decisive to lost and helpless. Sure we are supposed to be in control but she has to have some logical consistency to why she makes these choices. I should want to play as her not get out of her head as fast as I can.
Karen Thornberg
Thornberg "(I shouldn't worry if people think I am crazy. Perhaps I am a bit silly. Yet I have that kind of intoxicating insanity that lets those under my wing dream outside of the lines and become who they’re destined to be.)"
Thornberg "(I can see the universe in a grain of sand and heavenly glory in a wild flower. Holding grains of infinity in the palm of my hand and eternity at my feet.)"
Thornberg "(Who is to say that our dreams and nightmares are not as real as the here and now?)"
Those were her first lines... she doesn't get any better.
You could swear the rest of the characters leaped right out of a cartoon with how 2d and stereotypical they were.
I have never given negative points but this game genuine deserves it with how badly they destroyed a fairly good presentation with awful ideas.
Overall 0 STARS!!!
Oh look! I can hear Fried's wheezing from here!
