I apologise, i'll just tell my sister I haven't seen for 2 years I have to go home, someone needs their game pirating and apparently none of us are busy with anything else.
It's not like I haven't spent 12 years travelling the world in the army, jumped straight out of that into working as a personal trainer dealing with out of shape gobshites with more money than sense and haven't had a holiday since I was 18 .... i'm now 30 fucking 7.
The one time in nearly 20 years I take a bit of time off so me and my wife can relax a bit away from home while the kids are on a school holiday or off doing their thing and someone is upset their game isn't being uploaded for pirates.
It's been one of those days today.
First the hospital my wife works at phones up, she needs to go in, some bitch has a hangover and hasn't turned up. Nevermind we're at the other end of the country and they know this, twats.
Then I get a phone call from captain cheeseburger (one of my client .. makes me sound like a man whore .. that I train. claims he was once a Rugby captain but now looks like what would happen if playdough ever gains sentience). He goes off on one because i'm not at his beck and call when he wants to train .... it seems he still doesn't quite understand how bookings and appointments work despite us going over this 4 or 5 times ... maybe he did play Rugby and take one too many cock slaps to the face in the shower.
It also turns out I really, really, really don't like my sisters friends. All they talk about is money despite having very little of it and trying to make themselves sound far richer than they actually are. Not to mention one of them is one of those "anything you can do he can do better" types and if you claim to have met the Queen, he's tongue fucked her arse ... wanker.
Not the best holiday i've had although my sister is still awesome and she has a stocked liqueur cabinet so there is that. Hopefully my cousins next week will be just as enjoyable with fun and games galore....
Now this is why I don't do holidays.
Cos i'm a grumpy cunt.
How the fuck my wife copes I don't know.
Well, there it is. I can't share Dana with the masses because i'm on a phone with the bandwidth of Tinkerbells tiny waist. Had I known this issue would have arisen i'd have brought my rig with me and left my wife ... I didn't mean that my love if you see this, you know I jest, true story.
Edit - Well shit, I ranted for nothing, someone posted it anyway.
Now if someone wouldn't mind nipping to Weston Super Mare, asking my mother in law for our house keys and downloading it for me for when I get home ... that would be great.
Also I left a spider in the bath, it was fucking huge, if it's still there can you get rid of it. Look, they scare me alright the evil 8 legged cuntbuckets.
