it's not just swearing, yes I know women swear, I'm married to one. More-so, it's the way they talk in general in a lot of these games. It is totally obvious it's written by a guy and becomes hardly feminine. It's mostly the aggressiveness of some of the dialogue. This game is good enough it doesn't ruin much for me though.
Okay, I'm a writer, myself, and the Adderall is kicking in.
So how would you write Ashley: a young, immature girl with severe separation anxiety, PTSD, a girl who is afraid/averse to opening up to most to the point of confrontation, to the point where she carries a knife around/when she sleeps in order to feel safe/because she grew up without any real (withstanding and present) role-models while any other friends of whom she tried to befriend or emulate made fun of her/made her childhood hell? A girl discovering who she is beneath that trauma, who thus lashes out as a defense mechanism?
How would you write Kali: the elder, less socially confident gamer/tomboy sister (to a younger more overtlyy promiscuous and sexually confident sister) with clear feelings of inadequacy but also clear intellictual superiority, all the while trying to prove she can make it on her own to her dad but also her self (not to mention the dichotomy of the puppy dog younger sister following Kali, perhaps without even knowing how much she truly looks up to her)?
How would you write the Android: a being discovering what it's like and what it means to be what she is----a tool never meant to have consciousness----a tool of lust----a meta personification for all porn games' sexually desirable personalities were they, themselves to come to life----something made by someone she can barely recall----a being finding herself in a foreign world (which really could be any world), trying to gain a grasp on her place in it as well as discover social norms in order to fit in, consequentially discovering her own morals within those epiphanies?
How would you write Maria: an orphan who'd survived the shame of that connotation and identity by using what she had to get by---her good looks---but dreams of something more?
This Harem isn't so simply about collecting a bunch of innocent, naive girls, but getting to know them and seeing women as individuals with real, definable lives, issues, quirks, and personalities; but one thing they do all have in common is their own unique loneliness---a displacement from a society, finding home with the MC and a new family/social circle with the other tenants, finding healing for themselves through their own empowerment as well as help from their new 'family', which can be most apparent when looking at Lin---the literal slave elf in a human world, having lost all she knew and had hundreds(?) of years ago and yet still holds onto that sweet, wholesome love and perspective she has that no other character than her shares (and even gets flak for it), but comes into her own as she takes on the roll of mother figure to many of the younger tenants.
And like Runey says, each girl has their own voice.
Ashley is temperamental and vulgar, even prone to abrupt violence, with the aforementioned separation anxiety and PTSD playing heavy into that.
Maria takes on the role of a 'succubus' (her outfit is probably a nod to this), because that's how she's learned to get by and so speaks softly, seductively, and openly sexual to anyone/to any sex.
Kali is a nerd/gamer/antisocial to an extent and so lacks that cliche feminine grace, instead behaving more akin to a tomboy figure, awkwardly fumbling around any first time romance and sex (and then there's the rape....).
And as the King of Siam would say, "Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera," because my Adderall infused rant is over. Time for coffee and a smoke.
I never expected to use my creative writing major in this pornographic regard.
Now I just need to find something similar for my Android version too. I uh... Got it stuck on both. Hence why I wasn't specific with my version. 
