VN Ren'Py Abandoned Last Call [v0.4] [Thunderline Studios]

[Ryder-Wilson]

At the time of this post im where Kelly Jo invites MC inside after driving her home, not looking for spoilers I try to RP these games, like what would I do if I was MC (given the choices provided if I couldn't do what I personally would do) so my issue with MC's GF isn't that she's in a pic with some dude I don't know, its that MC is being ghosted basically.

If you think about it none of us have enough info to form an accurate opinion of who the guy is/ what relationship they have, tho I'd have to assume its someone MC hasn't seen before ie: not a brother or close friend or relative so he's got the right to be upset, if he doesn't know who it is she has either kept dude a secret Or just met him. If its innocent my issue would be her ignoring MC While these pics are surfacing almost like shes testing him or playing ho games.

The bottom line is MC deserves closure even if she knew it was over long ago. Like 1st priority, why u cuttin me off, Then if we're still speaking let's talk about mystery guy. These games have taught me to not make assumptions regarding jealousy as who knows what is going to develop further into the story, I'm trying to find a reason to justify GF's behavior but nothing reasonable makes any logical sense, i agree that no matter how i look at it it just feels like she's either a) fucking around on MC behind his back And flaunting it or b) she playing some immature mind games.

When RP'ing games its almost impossible to not overlay my values onto the MC, I'd have went to help uncle Max also: Family, True family is Everything bc if they're true fam they will have your back when everyone else has abandoned or given up on you >;D

She is indeed immature, cheat or not cheat. I hope that we will have the option to break up with her in the future(or the option to stay with her for people who like girls like Fiona). Though i think that the dude in the photo it's just a friend or a cousin.

 

[TheDuraflex]

The writing is good, characters and renders also but the sex? Its wham, bam, thank you ma'am.... theres no foreplay, teasing or passion they barely even speak through it, if theres something to work on its that, i mean the second sex scene is 10 pics and done! The rest is good the sex needs work.

 

[Xarin]

Damn, Morgan is thicker than a bowl of oatmeal

 

[Ryder-Wilson]

The writing is good, characters and renders also but the sex? Its wham, bam, thank you ma'am.... theres no foreplay, teasing or passion they barely even speak through it, if theres something to work on its that, i mean the second sex scene is 10 pics and done! The rest is good the sex needs work.

I agree, only the sex scenes are disappointing for the moment. Developer can improve update after update so let's hope for the best.

 

[Tarasia]

The writing is good, characters and renders also but the sex? Its wham, bam, thank you ma'am.... theres no foreplay, teasing or passion they barely even speak through it, if theres something to work on its that, i mean the second sex scene is 10 pics and done! The rest is good the sex needs work.

Considering who the actual scenes currently are with, i do not believe she likes foreplay. She likes the hunt.

 

[Avaron1974]

At the time of this post im where Kelly Jo invites MC inside after driving her home, not looking for spoilers I try to RP these games, like what would I do if I was MC (given the choices provided if I couldn't do what I personally would do) so my issue with MC's GF isn't that she's in a pic with some dude I don't know, its that MC is being ghosted basically.

If you think about it none of us have enough info to form an accurate opinion of who the guy is/ what relationship they have, tho I'd have to assume its someone MC hasn't seen before ie: not a brother or close friend or relative so he's got the right to be upset, if he doesn't know who it is she has either kept dude a secret Or just met him. If its innocent my issue would be her ignoring MC While these pics are surfacing almost like shes testing him or playing ho games.

The bottom line is MC deserves closure & even if she knew it was over long ago. They should've spoken more in depth at the flashback of when he decided to leave, like "is this a deal breaker for you babe?"

Like 1st priority, why u cuttin me off, Then if we're still speaking let's talk about mystery guy. These games have taught me to not make assumptions regarding jealousy as who knows what is going to develop further into the story, I'm trying to find a reason to justify GF's behavior but nothing reasonable makes any logical sense, i agree that no matter how i look at it it just feels like she's either a) fucking around on MC behind his back And flaunting it or b) she playing some immature mind games.

When RP'ing games its almost impossible to not overlay my values onto the MC, I'd have went to help uncle Max also: Family, True family is Everything bc if they're true fam they will have your back when everyone else has abandoned or given up on you >;D

He told her he'd be gone for 2 weeks then 2 weeks later she asks when he'll be back he said I don't know.

That, right there, would have been the cut off point for me too.

They had plans as a couple and he gave her up to go run a pub for a guy he didn't know and shit all over the life they had.

Neither of them are ready for a relationship. She may have ghosted him but he shit on her first. She can't be expected to put her life on hold when she already had it all planned out that was unfair of him. They should have broke it off when he left.

 

[MuffinManWantsPregnancy]

At the time of this post im where Kelly Jo invites MC inside after driving her home, not looking for spoilers I try to RP these games, like what would I do if I was MC (given the choices provided if I couldn't do what I personally would do) so my issue with MC's GF isn't that she's in a pic with some dude I don't know, its that MC is being ghosted basically.

If you think about it none of us have enough info to form an accurate opinion of who the guy is/ what relationship they have, tho I'd have to assume its someone MC hasn't seen before ie: not a brother or close friend or relative so he's got the right to be upset, if he doesn't know who it is she has either kept dude a secret Or just met him. If its innocent my issue would be her ignoring MC While these pics are surfacing almost like shes testing him or playing ho games.

The bottom line is MC deserves closure & even if she knew it was over long ago. They should've spoken more in depth at the flashback of when he decided to leave, like "is this a deal breaker for you babe?"

Like 1st priority, why u cuttin me off, Then if we're still speaking let's talk about mystery guy. These games have taught me to not make assumptions regarding jealousy as who knows what is going to develop further into the story, I'm trying to find a reason to justify GF's behavior but nothing reasonable makes any logical sense, i agree that no matter how i look at it it just feels like she's either a) fucking around on MC behind his back And flaunting it or b) she playing some immature mind games.

When RP'ing games its almost impossible to not overlay my values onto the MC, I'd have went to help uncle Max also: Family, True family is Everything bc if they're true fam they will have your back when everyone else has abandoned or given up on you >;D

I agree with pretty much everything you said. I mean I could just forgive her later on and enjoy some sexy scenes with her, but I immerse myself too much into these games and put in my own values as well. I have had my fair share of toxic relationships over the years irl, and this one hits home way too much and just doesn't seem to be any better. She is childish, EXTREMELY selfish (all I saw was me, me, me when MC wanted to help his uncle), and doesn't show empathy. Even if what the MC did by going away for longer than a few weeks was wrong the least she could have done is tell him she is done instead of continuing to string him along. Even if there is something more going on that could potentially redeem her (I don't see it actually happening), I couldn't really give a fuck lol.

 

[SumTingWong0420]

He told her he'd be gone for 2 weeks then 2 weeks later she asks when he'll be back he said I don't know.

That, right there, would have been the cut off point for me too.

They had plans as a couple and he gave her up to go run a pub for a guy he didn't know and shit all over the life they had.

Neither of them are ready for a relationship. She may have ghosted him but he shit on her first. She can't be expected to put her life on hold when she already had it all planned out that was unfair of him. They should have broke it off when he left.

I got to the end but even having all the current info during the 2 week talk, I DO blame both parties tho most is on her, mc for not asking if they were still good, if he felt something was off he did fail to address it right there, but her also as all she said was she didn't feel important, since it seemed to be bothering her more as it wasn't Her dying family in need that was fate screaming at her to either give him an ultimatum (tho that would've been messed up too she deserves closure as much as mc) or accept plans can & will change in life no matter how much of it you've planned out. He should've said Idk when originally asked how long he'd be gone, I feel like he's been honest & communicated his intentions well while she seems undecided on taking any action other than ignoring him.

All I'm saying is to me its not about her putting her life on hold, she shouldn't have to But don't leave it open, IF she developed feelings for someone else she should've just told him when she realized it, even if it was the only single response she ever sent him after the 2 week talk she should've sent an email saying 'hey it feels like you've chosen there over us, sorry to say my feelings have changed, we are Not going to work out, have a good life' hell word it anyway she wanted.

I suppose with what we're seeing of her character so far she'd probably have been fine with mc saying something along the lines of 'my uncle whom I've gotten to know & is a pretty cool guy, is dying & his business will fail if I leave now but ill see you soon' Turning a blind eye on a dying family member to keep plans 100% on schedule with a woman you've been with for 730 days shouldn't be someone to make a family with, it shouldn't have to be uncle Versus girlfriend but the plot is what it is, I hope its not as simple as that though.

I realize I'm favoring MC's pov but he is the main male protagonist & being a dude I imagine its easiest to relate to his pov >;D

All just my personal opinion here

 

[Warsteel]

Some strange ideas floating around here. First off the photo of Fi doesn't mean a thing. Ooooo a picture of her getting kissed on the side of her head (literally in her hair... eww) by some dude she isn't even facing doesn't prove she's cheating. Her not answering the MC's emails, texts, telepathic sends, smoke signals and Hermes himself hand delivering a note is what is concerning. Is it a ploy to lure him back to where she is? Or a total misunderstanding (could be a family member at a family event)? Either way she isn't going about handling things correctly, so I'm over her.

Second the MC is what you make of him. I don't much care to have some "personality" thrust on me in a game... making my character do things I wouldn't do or strong opinions I think are shit. Give me some options and let me choose. People are making him out to be some beta cuck when he's (if you want) getting ass from the milf and has the thicc chick wanting a turn. Yeah so he was bummed his girl is ghosting him... she's hot, he should be bummed.

As for that milf the sex is exactly what I'd expect from a cougar on the prowl. She isn't some teenage ditz in love. She wants the D because Maximus Plasticus ain't Caesar enough for her all the time.

 

[Xarin]

Shit, if we got the option to break up with whatever predetermined girlfriend the MC has in every game I'd be on that instantly.

 

[LordSinner]

Some strange ideas floating around here. First off the photo of Fi doesn't mean a thing. Ooooo a picture of her getting kissed on the side of her head (literally in her hair... eww) by some dude she isn't even facing doesn't prove she's cheating. Her not answering the MC's emails, texts, telepathic sends, smoke signals and Hermes himself hand delivering a note is what is concerning. Is it a ploy to lure him back to where she is? Or a total misunderstanding (could be a family member at a family event)? Either way she isn't going about handling things correctly, so I'm over her.

Second the MC is what you make of him. I don't much care to have some "personality" thrust on me in a game... making my character do things I wouldn't do or strong opinions I think are shit. Give me some options and let me choose. People are making him out to be some beta cuck when he's (if you want) getting ass from the milf and has the thicc chick wanting a turn. Yeah so he was bummed his girl is ghosting him... she's hot, he should be bummed.

As for that milf the sex is exactly what I'd expect from a cougar on the prowl. She isn't some teenage ditz in love. She wants the D because Maximus Plasticus ain't Caesar enough for her all the time.

Getting pussy doesn't make him any less of a beta. In fact calling him beta may be an insult to actual betas.

 

[Philip Screwdriver]

He told her he'd be gone for 2 weeks then 2 weeks later she asks when he'll be back he said I don't know.

That, right there, would have been the cut off point for me too.

They had plans as a couple and he gave her up to go run a pub for a guy he didn't know and shit all over the life they had.

Neither of them are ready for a relationship. She may have ghosted him but he shit on her first. She can't be expected to put her life on hold when she already had it all planned out that was unfair of him. They should have broke it off when he left.

The MC is certainly not blameless here, no question. (Though just to be clear--because I'm not quite sure how to read your syntax--you're not saying he'd been there four weeks when he said he didn't know, right?) However, I agree with SumTingWong0420, and I think there are a couple things to say besides. One, "she already had it all planned out." Not, note, they already had it all planned out--she did. That's really not a healthy trajectory they were on.

Two, and right in line with that, note her reaction when the MC starts talking about going to help his uncle: it's all about her. She shows no compassion for anyone but herself, and no empathy whatsoever. It reminds me of the way Harriet Walter played Fanny Dashwood in the opening of Ang Lee's version of Sense and Sensibility. (It also reminds me of Sylvia Linsky in Tex Murphy: Overseer, but that probably means nothing to anyone but me.)

The MC was royally stupid to say "I promise"--he put his word down on an unknown situation, which is never wise; and then he let the pressures of that situation dictate his actions, instead of holding his word as something he had to honor. He had his ass in a crack at that point and no mistake, but he could have tried to honor his commitments in both directions, instead of just one. He has no right to complain about getting dumped. But that said, her behavior is a lot more problematic, not just after the MC's departure to Oaklane, but before.

 

[Philip Screwdriver]

Getting pussy doesn't make him any less of a beta. In fact calling him beta may be an insult to actual betas.

OK, so. Anyone can complain, few can create. How would you rewrite the character and story to make them acceptable to your incisive judgment?

 

[Warsteel]

Getting pussy doesn't make him any less of a beta. In fact calling him beta may be an insult to actual betas.

Dude, betas ain't pulling every hot chick in visual range. Life just doesn't work that way. Don't know where the hell you got the notion it does but it ain't Earth.

 

[ChrisHaze]

Great game, interesting story. You should probably remove the animation tag though.

 

[Warsteel]

Great game, interesting story. You should probably remove the animation tag though.

Ummm it has animations in it.

 

[msleomac]

The writing is good, characters and renders also but the sex? Its wham, bam, thank you ma'am.... theres no foreplay, teasing or passion they barely even speak through it, if theres something to work on its that, i mean the second sex scene is 10 pics and done! The rest is good the sex needs work.

I think its wham bamm because that's what it is. Two people just in for the sex and not for any connection. Pretty sure the passion and forplay will come once they get serious or with some other partner the MC is serious about.

 

[pmyourladyparts]

Hmm. The sex scenes were kind of disappointing to be honest.

The story is fine enough. It's written well enough. The renders and models look pretty good in general. However the two sex scenes we've had with KJ were pretty disappointing and mediocre. The second one in the latest chapter was basically just a series of disconnected imagery with no writing at all.

 

[fkrfxr]

this story is developing quite well. I know I am enjoying it and that is really all that matters is that someone gets some enjoyment from your hard work. thanks for the share and please continue.

 

[Cthulhu4Prez2020]

Finally got around to playing this, and completely LOVE Morgan. If I can have her than not really worried about the rest (tho I wouldn't say no to a crack at Annie). However, I tried going thru the thread until I gave up around page 9, so I don't know if anyone else mentioned it yet. Has anyone noticed that the phone number Morgan gave MC is wrong? (Ok...granted...her name isn't Jenny...)