VN Ren'Py Long Road Home [v10.1 Part 3] [OBDGames]

4.40 star(s) 125 Votes
Discussion Reviews (125)
FuzzyPredator

FuzzyPredator

Newbie
Jan 16, 2023
26
16
Elduriel said:
you can edit the files and share with the dev or with the community afterwards and that's that (tho it's probably better if the dev publishes it, can't always trust random files on the internet)
Click to expand...
Will do, working my way through 10.3 first to see what the Dev/you guys think, and will go through others after!


Dimitri57 said:
I fixed run-a-way in the script already. Thanks for the heads up! (y) You're right, it was poor phrasing :oops:

Thank you for your offer. Other have helped out in the past as well. I've always been a voracious reader, but I absolutely hated English and creative writing in school. My grammar and sentence structure reflect that.

I have a built in Russian advisor. My wife of 20 years is Russian. I can go to her for advice, but I learned most of it by emersion while working in one of the former Soviet Republics for five years.

The scripts are in the game, ep1.rpy, ep2.rpy, etc. They can be opened in notepad or wordpad. The text is embedded in the RenPy coding so editing can be tricky. Ren'Py is very particular in spacing and the use of certain symbols. Others have made changes in scripts and sent it back to me not knowing how or what they changed. I won't use them since they would crash the game if the coding was changed inadvertently during editing.

If you want to proofread the script, you can DM with me your corrections in notepad or whatever format that is convenient for you. Just reference which script and what line in the script where the correction needs to be made and I'll change it on my end.

Bear in mind, I use a lot of slang, localisms and colloquialisms. I strive to have the dialog read like people actually speak rather than perfect, grammatically correct English. I follow some games that do, and they come off stiff and robotic to me.

I'll gladly correct typos and errors. I can't promise I'll sanitize dialog that may raise the hackles of an experienced English teacher! :p (JD's manner of speaking as an example.)

Thank you again for helping me create a better experience for the player.

Adventure on!
Dima
Click to expand...

I'm going through and correcting the script of 10.3 atm and will figure out the best way to get the RPY file to you once I'm done. I'm leaving majority as-is, but correcting missing/misplaced words and some structure to make it "sound" better. Once done I will DM you and see what you think!

EDIT: I have some experience in coding and will NOT touch any spacing or coding AT ALL, I'm only changing the text of the script... If it helps, I'll do a quick playthrough once done to ensure it works fine before handing it to you!
 
Last edited:
  • Thinking Face
Reactions: Dimitri57
Dimitri57

Dimitri57

Oldest Dev on F95
Donor
Game Developer
Dec 12, 2017
1,394
6,356
FuzzyPredator said:
Will do, working my way through 10.3 first to see what the Dev/you guys think, and will go through others after!





I'm going through and correcting the script of 10.3 atm and will figure out the best way to get the RPY file to you once I'm done. I'm leaving majority as-is, but correcting missing/misplaced words and some structure to make it "sound" better. Once done I will DM you and see what you think!
Click to expand...
I've ran the later scripts through a grammar/spell check program. I'd like to think there isn't that many things that fell through the cracks! :oops:

It's not perfect process though. I have to strip out the RenPy coding, run the program, make note of the errors, then make the corrections in the script.
 
FuzzyPredator

FuzzyPredator

Newbie
Jan 16, 2023
26
16
Dimitri57 said:
I've ran the later scripts through a grammar/spell check program. I'd like to think there isn't that many things that fell through the cracks! :oops:

It's not perfect process though. I have to strip out the RenPy coding, run the program, make note of the errors, then make the corrections in the script.
Click to expand...
That also sounds like a PITA process to do. In the future, feel free to forward me the stripped/checked version and I can give it a once over to catch anything that fell through the cracks. That way we can end up with a nigh on perfect script :love:
 
EfontMan

EfontMan

Active Member
Aug 23, 2021
552
1,113
Dimitri57 said:
I'd like to think there isn't that many things that fell through the cracks!
Click to expand...
It's primarily grammatical. Leaving aside the quirks of individual mannerisms and speech styles, there are various issues with non-conversational text for things like scene descriptions and so forth.
 
  • Like
Reactions: motseer
motseer

motseer

Engaged Member
Dec 17, 2021
2,503
5,749
Dimitri57 said:
I've ran the later scripts through a grammar/spell check program. I'd like to think there isn't that many things that fell through the cracks! :oops:

It's not perfect process though. I have to strip out the RenPy coding, run the program, make note of the errors, then make the corrections in the script.
Click to expand...
So... Dima, you are a great story teller. You're dialogue flows as naturally as can be. Grammar... Not so much. Case in point, "I'd like to think there isn't aren't that many things that fell through the cracks!" It's not terrible. It's just not publisher perfect. Now... You're being offered free assistance from an English teacher. That translates as "professional sentence builder". It couldn't hurt. Most likely will help. I've been hangin' around this site for a few years now and this is hands down my favorite story. Take every opportunity to make it even better. Jus' Sayin':cool:
 
  • Wow
Reactions: HornyyPussy
HiHaHo

HiHaHo

Well-Known Member
Jan 2, 2023
1,144
1,397
motseer said:
So... Dima, you are a great story teller. You're dialogue flows as naturally as can be. Grammar... Not so much. Case in point, "I'd like to think there isn't aren't that many things that fell through the cracks!" It's not terrible. It's just not publisher perfect. Now... You're being offered free assistance from an English teacher. That translates as "professional sentence builder". It couldn't hurt. Most likely will help. I've been hanging' around this site for a few years now and this is hands down my favourite story. Take every opportunity to make it even better. Jus' Sayin':cool:
Click to expand...
true if hes willing to help why not right?
just give em early access a day or 2 before release so he can do a run on the new content to check it

Then again you could say some off the grammar & sentence building "mistakes" could reflect realism
Not that the characters in the AVN are stupid ,but you're bound to find these things IRL to

(and non native english speakers like me wouldn't even notice them,on here the browser spelling check really helps me though)
 
HornyyPussy

HornyyPussy

Message Maven
Apr 26, 2020
12,647
29,502
motseer said:
So... Dima, you are a great story teller. You're dialogue flows as naturally as can be. Grammar... Not so much. Case in point, "I'd like to think there isn't aren't that many things that fell through the cracks!" It's not terrible. It's just not publisher perfect. Now... You're being offered free assistance from an English teacher. That translates as "professional sentence builder". It couldn't hurt. Most likely will help. I've been hangin' around this site for a few years now and this is hands down my favorite story. Take every opportunity to make it even better. Jus' Sayin':cool:
Click to expand...
Everyone's a critic.........
 
  • Haha
Reactions: motseer
c3p0

c3p0

Forum Fanatic
Respected User
Nov 20, 2017
4,742
11,586
HornyyPussy said:
Everyone's a critic.........
Click to expand...
Yes, Mr. HornyyPussy. I could remember you about a post to include more cast in his game, even from outside of LRH, but that would be a critic, isn't it?:geek::p:LOL:
HornyyPussy said:
Hey Dima, if I suggest a bunch of amazing LI's from other VN's, could you be a dear and add them to LRH, thanks!
Click to expand...
Couldn't let this slip, you know me.:sneaky::giggle:
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Wow
Reactions: Dimitri57, creyden, markel1000 and 2 others
JGNeon

JGNeon

Active Member
Feb 24, 2021
583
1,772
ydraiggoch said:
View attachment 3390227

Is there anybody else getting this error, when MC opens his eyes in the hospital?
Click to expand...
I got the same error, too. It happened both times I tried passing that moment (by chance, I had made a save when MC was walking back to Elvira after "dealing" with Johnny, shortly before the hospital scene; I usually get into the habit to make a save when it feels like a possible cliffhanger moment, just in case the story ends for this update).

I could easily continue past this error by hitting "Ignore", at least.
 
HornyyPussy

HornyyPussy

Message Maven
Apr 26, 2020
12,647
29,502
c3p0 said:
Yes, Mr. HornyyPussy. I could remember you about a post to include more cast in his game, even from outside of LRH, but that would be a critic, isn't it?:geek::p:LOL:

Couldn't let this slip, you know me.:sneaky::giggle:
Click to expand...
Mine was a courteous request.........
 
  • Thinking Face
Reactions: c3p0
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
4.40 star(s) 125 Votes