VN Ren'Py Abandoned Lost [Ep. 1] [CesnyStudio]

RogMR

Member
Sep 21, 2019
179
559
Overview:
How important is childhood love for someone who is the only human childhood sweetheart in his life?
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What?
"How important is childhood love to someone (MC) who had just one childhood girlfriend in his life?"

I think that MC had a childhood girlfriend in his life. And will find her again at some point. I haven't played Ep1 yet. If she hasn't shown up yet, at some point MC childhood girlfriend will show up.

I don't know if DEV's intention is for MC have a childhood girlfriend. Or a sister, called a childhood girlfriend to avoid problems with patreon page.
 
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MrFriendly

Officially Dead Inside
Donor
Feb 23, 2020
5,875
14,454
The renders are decent but this needs a much better translation and at least one proofread by someone who understands what story the developer is trying to tell. It's not terrible but it is just bad enough to be confusing. The story needs more buildup so that we can become more invested in the characters.

Hope that it will improve, it has some potential.
 
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Mauser45

Active Member
Nov 6, 2017
645
841
How important is childhood love for someone who is the only human childhood sweetheart in his life?

How do I answer? I don't wanna piss the old wizard off. I'm worthy, I tell ya! Let me marry the princess already! o_O
 
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BTLD

Engaged Member
Sep 18, 2017
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2nd and 6th picture remind me alot of Nea ( Appartment 69)
 

King Slayer100

Active Member
Modder
Aug 20, 2018
680
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That's how you should write an overview . people have to play it in order to understand it and then they will come out even more confused, waiting for next update . GENIUS :WeSmart:
 

fkrfxr

Member
Nov 9, 2019
483
427
I liked it. Look forward to more. Nice story good pics. the translation need a bit of a tweak but the story can still be understood. thanks for the share
 

Chris_Prat

Member
May 19, 2017
419
324
Overview made you wonder what's going on with this game and playing it doesn't show up any clue about (as I read here).
Could be added the tag 'surreal' to the whole thing?
 

Sesinho

Active Member
Jan 3, 2020
552
3,150
So the lost wife appears and possesses the girl in the last picture and she goes full Regan?
 

Fayran

New Member
Jan 2, 2018
9
16
Hey, I made a little English "Fix", which took more time than I want to admit, to fix "most" of the weird grammar and other stuff.

BUT it's FAR from perfect mostly because I just changed the text to make at least a bit more sense, and I've changed the sentences that don't make any sense at all. (The 100x chef and darling, etc are still there, just like the strange conversations with a bit of cringe between MC and Jessica and Lucy)

Some still don't make much sense but the problem there is that I can't speak Turkish and even with several translators I don't get a sentence I can work with. So I have zero clues what the Developer wanted to tell us :D. Also, I translated the Turkish sentences with Google Translate but they should be pretty accurate(At least they make sense).

And last but not least, it seems that I'm too stupid to make a patch for Ren'py, so you need to unren your game and but the scripy.py into "game\tl\engilsh"

(I tried a lot but somehow it just overrides it with the original when I build the game even if the original no longer exists. But maybe someone can make a proper patch out of it.)

If you find any bugs, sentences I just forgot, or if you have ideas on how to change a specific sentence just slide into my DMs (or fix it on your own, it's not that hard)


Ps. English is not my native language, so this Fix was probably one of the worst ideas I've ever had, but hey, no risk no fun, or something like that ;)

Edit: V2 is out!

I changed a lot of sentences at some parts so that the sentences fit better together it's not perfect and it's not proofreaded (yet) but it looks way better than before if you ask me (Keep in mind that this is my first try one something like this and my creativity is beyond bad.)
 
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dougiehouser

Member
Jun 9, 2019
247
345
I don't think Engrish is the biggest issue, though yes for sure there are lots of times I had to think quite hard to work out what the sentence was actually trying to say.
I think the main problem is more the flow.

Every sentence feels
Like it exists
On it's own

Anyway, you get the idea.

Overall the idea is interesting but it needs an editor rather than simply a translator to get that across.

Also, not a fan of the painted eyelids, just looks weird, though that could be entirely intentional with the otherworldly feel to whole thing.