The scene where you find Mia in the elevator was weird for me. I think it skipped most of the animation, so I was a bit confused when people started talking about
It honestly looked like she heard a noise off-screen and just jumped down and landed on me.
As for the scene where you're cutting wood with her, the shadow that shows up is way too far away. It feels like I could easily have taken the axe back from Mia and gone off and killed it with no threat.
So it feels weird that the main character is acting so desperately.
Maybe have it appear a little closer?
Edit: Safe / Save is a consistent type too.
Edit2: Also, it'd make sense to give Mia the spear, once you have the axe. Maybe give it to her when you give her the airgun, since she's standing guard while you're in the city?
Edit3: You find the keybox in the hospital and then take it home. It feels a little weird. Every trip in and out of the city takes a full day, so you're wasting an entire day because you dont want to smash the box open on-site, for basically no reason.
It's not going to be louder than the fighting and gunshots already happening as you travel, so you might as well fucking do it.
Especially since someone is literally dying waiting for you to stop fucking about and bring her medical supplies.
Edit4: Refering to lily as 'Best friend' and 'Mate' is kinda weird. It doesn't feel natural.
Your friends might be your mates, but you don't really say 'Hey mate' or even worse, just 'Mate' to get their attention.
Buddy, Pal, Friend.
Also, Lily being your best friend but being a completely new character we've never seen before feels like a problem.
"childhood friend" would feel more fitting than 'best friend'
Especially if you haven't seen her in a long time.