I agree with this comment, but I think that as a dom you have somewhat of a skewed perspective in that you gave a very accurate and good definition of real life BDSM/sexual domination, where it is all essentially a consensual role-play and the true party that is in control is indeed the submissive, as it is after all either a service performed by the dom/domme for money or a consensual activity adults voluntarily engage in. However, both femdom and maledom in fictional media can and do include scenarios where contol is taken without consent, not given by the sub as you stated here:
There are countless games and erotica stories out there in dystopian societies with sexualized slavery, or in various fantasy settings where, again, slavery or (mostly in the case of maledom this latter one) harems are commonplace etc. All of these games, which do include various forms of either rape, noncon or at least dubcon, have to be included under the umbrella of "femdom" or "maledom", and they wouldn't be if we operate solely on the principled moral position that consent has to be given by both parties and control given by the sub. When it comes to fictional media, I personally consider a story/game femdom only if:
1. The mistress is calling the shots/in control (I know this is not the case when I go to a pro-domme irl, but, for us subs, regardless of sex or orientation, the appeal of being "dominated" is at least the fantasy/illusion of losing control, and obviously in fictional media that fantasy can be explored as if it were real and to greater depths than in a 2 hours BDSM session...)
2. The mistress is not put in any degrading/humiliating/submissive position by the contents of the erotic acts themselves, even if she seems to enjoy them (eg she can very well call the shots but order her "sub" to spit on her, slap her or flog her, in which case we would obviously be dealing with maledom sexual acts in a female-lead relationship, or in other words with a sexually-submissive female that is in a position of power... Plenty of Japanese "femdom" games have females that enjoy taking the initiative and giving blowjobs/drinking cum and going "SUGOI!!!" at big penises, so, as I consider blowjobs maledom-leaning vanilla sex, just like cunnilingus is femdom-leaning vanilla sex, games that only have such scenes and vanilla intercourse do not qualify as femdom)
3. The mistress derives some form of pleasure from the erotic acts she engages in (this is more to retain the submissive fantasy - I still technically agree that a game is femdom, not vanilla or maledom, if most of the erotic scenes are, for example, footjobs given to a male MC by female characters on their own initiative, even if they don't seem to enjoy it much and the entire monologue is about what the MC or his penis feels like, treating the female characters more like props facilitating his sexual fantasy. That too happens in some Japanese games, so I usually discount them as femdom because they are very male pleasure centric. Again, if I'd have to classify them on a maledom-vanilla-femdom spectrum, probably I'd still call this sort of games "male-centric soft femdom", and they obviously have an audience in Japan as they otherwise wouldn't be made in the first place, but I've barely met any submissives or dominant women that liked them...)
Anyway, I agree with your original response to honeryx and most of what you wrote here - I just think that in fictional media consent and control being given up by (not taken from) the sub is less important than the actual dynamics of the sex scenes, and a broader definition of femdom and maledom media is more useful as it can include all the slavery/harem/rape/non-con/dub-con material out there!
Obviously consent is the most important condition irl, and it's perfectly fine if anyone only likes to see their fetishes portrayed in consensual acts/relations, but it's also important to recognize that in fictional media a lot of non-consensual acts of sexual dominance are portrayed and that practice is not immoral, because fictional characters do not have our rights and are an outlet for people to sometimes explore fantasies that would be impossible or extremely unpleasant in real life. Take care and have a great day!
