4.10 star(s) 9 Votes

LexiTV

Member
Jan 24, 2018
368
643
Normally I take criticism well, and try to learn from it... but there's nothing to take away from this.

Like, it's just a throwaway cry for the moment of orgasm, obviously. It's a repeated sequence, and I think that's clear and a common enough practice to not be a surprise to you.

Besides, if my lovers were creating beautiful prose at the moment of orgasm, I would start to question if they're really paying that much attention to me.

Anyway, the whole erotic dialogue is literally everything else - there's thousands of words in this game so it seems a little mean spirited to focus on that.

So, I'm sorry you didn't like my game. You're free to go and create your own to show me how it's done. I'll play it, approaching it with an open mind and I'll give you constructive and useful criticism at the end.

Finally, I'm sorry my reply is a little prickly, but for the reasons given above your criticism seems neither in good faith or constructive to me
I told you the game has potential and I really liked it. I do not hate or dislike it.
It doesn't change the fact that some writing (especially the masturbation scenes) is cringe.
First of all you use the same few words again and again. Not every orgasm, especially while masturbating makes a woman go "OH" "MYYYY!!" "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD" or "FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKK" - I don't think any men do it like this either.
After you read this a couple of times you almost get the idea that it's supposed to be a bad inside joke or a dumb meme. Nah it's just lazy & bad writing.

You have to admit that you can do better if you are honest to yourself!

While your game is awesome you should have at least a bit of self awareness and recognize that your writing during sex scenes is abysmal and you have much room to improve there.
You should be glad because you did the more difficult things great and imo just fucked up something easily fixable.

There are like thousands games on this site. Please play a few and actually read the dialogue during sex scenes. Either copy and rewrite some phrases 1 to 1 or at least use it as a reference.

I did not want to mock or attack you and I did not even write my comment directed to you.
It just kinda ruined my immersion in the game because this dialogue made me cringe so hard... especially after I read the same thing like 3 or 4 times.
 

ExcitingEpiphany

Member
Game Developer
Aug 18, 2019
153
273
I told you the game has potential and I really liked it. I do not hate or dislike it.
It doesn't change the fact that some writing (especially the masturbation scenes) is cringe.
First of all you use the same few words again and again. Not every orgasm, especially while masturbating makes a woman go "OH" "MYYYY!!" "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD" or "FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKK" - I don't think any men do it like this either.
After you read this a couple of times you almost get the idea that it's supposed to be a bad inside joke or a dumb meme. Nah it's just lazy & bad writing.
I'm not sure I agree. It's an obvious shorthand and used in about a million different games, and in porn and in lots of sex scenes. While it's an exaggerated response, to be sure, it's not an impossible one in real life and it doesn't especially challenge the suspension of disbelief, in fact there's a lot of the audience that would kind of expect something along those lines.

In addition, my MC is a bit of a screamer, something that will come into play in the current act as she masturbates in the street (if I can get the mechanics right). So think of it as a kind of Chekov's gun. Chekov's cum.

I've played a lot of games here, and you see it or you don't and it goes with the territory. Like that bit is just a bark, it's even done as a runnable routine because writing a game is a lot of work and you've got to save time where you can. I'd sort of concede the point that there's not enough variety there though. I've got about 4, and I'd planned to expand and randomise the range of end scenes.

Anyway, thank you for the clarification. Your commentary did not seem to me to be framed as honest constructive criticism, and it seems I was wrong on that, so my apologies.

I'll think about it, although I do think of this as a matter of taste rather than anything I need to address.
 
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Nneophyte

Newbie
May 11, 2023
24
32
After reading the:
"OH"
"MYYYY"
"GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD"
2 times right at the beginning I was already close to dropping this. Dev you suck as a writer and need help... URGENTLY. Which is a shame because this game has lots of potential....

*Edit. It continued. Is this supposed to be funny? The cringe is too hard.
The whole erotic dialogue is only "FUCK" "FUCK" " FUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKK" "OH" "MYYYYYY" "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
I’m wondering what you would replace these short but succinct expressions with? This is not an idle interest in my game, when orgasm approaches, the main character thinks about the same as here - with the same lines.
 

ExcitingEpiphany

Member
Game Developer
Aug 18, 2019
153
273
I’m wondering what you would replace these short but succinct expressions with? This is not an idle interest in my game, when orgasm approaches, the main character thinks about the same as here - with the same lines.
I’ve been thinking about this. The thing is in the early versions those didn’t exist. In all occurrences they’re sandwiched between prose describing the orgasm. I went and purposefully added them back in because it felt to me like I expected them to be there (alongside the camera shake). I still expect them to be there so I’m unconvinced.
 

Nneophyte

Newbie
May 11, 2023
24
32
I’ve been thinking about this. The thing is in the early versions those didn’t exist. In all occurrences they’re sandwiched between prose describing the orgasm. I went and purposefully added them back in because it felt to me like I expected them to be there (alongside the camera shake). I still expect them to be there so I’m unconvinced.
We have a common expression. When criticizing, suggest. Uncontested criticism is not constructive. That's why I asked LexiTV - what would it replace the existing phrases with? I personally am quite satisfied with the existing phrases. It seems to me that they are said to the point. Based on my personal experience and world cultural heritage :)
 

eddje

Newbie
Apr 27, 2020
45
39
Hello there!

I've fixed that annoying re-dressing bug and some others:

Here is public release: 0.10.2

Release Notes:
  • Fixed the problem where it keeps re-dressing you
  • Fixed some wordings
  • Fixed the problem where one of the bins opens if you enter a different bin
  • Improved performance slightly

(About the MAC release... I've tried to put this together for our mac friends. The problem is, I don't have a mac so I've no idea if this actually works. Please let me know, and I'll try to fix it.)

PC: Mega
MAC: Mega
Hi, Dev! Happy to get a MAC version of your great game! Unfortunately, I wasn't able to run it on my mbp.. Can you tell me witch nwjs version you're using?
 

Mishikos

New Member
Jan 7, 2024
1
0
I have a problem with my save. After the start of a new day and the tutorial, Sarah stands at the door and does not allow me to pass.Talking to her doesn’t help, she just repeats the phrase that mc should invite her with her next time to have fun and nothing else happens. Could you please take a look and fix it if possible? I clearly have no desire to start the game from the beginning. Thank you.
 

DarkRay1234

Newbie
Jun 6, 2023
48
44
I have a problem with my save. After the start of a new day and the tutorial, Sarah stands at the door and does not allow me to pass.Talking to her doesn’t help, she just repeats the phrase that mc should invite her with her next time to have fun and nothing else happens. Could you please take a look and fix it if possible? I clearly have no desire to start the game from the beginning. Thank you.
I too have the same issue. Please help someone.
 

ExcitingEpiphany

Member
Game Developer
Aug 18, 2019
153
273
Thats really cool,

I have talked about and seen other discussion about the pool events and it is likely that they might be a work in progress, so i thought I would give some thoughts on the cafe events as i haven't seen any discussion about them.

A clear creative decision was made that jen would be watching the cafe events while not actively being at the table, which i respect and could lead to some kinky play.

However in line with my earlier discussions I think it would be great if in the early cafe scene where the man walks past and emma is obviously distressed if jen were to come over and give her a hug.

It doesn't need to be a big scene but i think it would do a few good things.

1. It would obviously be a good emotional scene.

2. It would establish that jen is actually at the location watching her.

3. It would imply that jen would be there for her if something were to go wrong with the dares and would step in if necessary.

4. Hugs are the best above even hand holding :D
I've taken this into account... next release at the weekend.
 

ExcitingEpiphany

Member
Game Developer
Aug 18, 2019
153
273
Release 0.11.3
RAR:
ZIP:

Quite a big update this time. There's a huge array of bug fixes, but the focus of this release is on making the freeform stripping during the daytime more meaningful. The big ticket items are:

  • Achievement events (when you are naked for a period of time, seen by x people, etc)
  • New events at the office
  • "Bark" Mechanic
  • Heart finder mechanic
  • NPCs pathfinding significantly improved.

For those interested, here's the full list:

Release Notes 0.11.0

  • Fixed bug with clothing not resetting
  • Fixed bug where you can get stuck and unable to strip
  • Fixed NPC navigation in daytime
  • Added event indicators (to daytime for now)
  • Added Jen/Emma relationship context event after cafe.
  • Refined levelling and made it a bit quicker
  • Fixed some event wordings
  • NPC numbers increase as you level up in daytime.
  • Increased experience for certain things.
  • 5 new office events added ("1:1 meetings")
  • Events now trigger for certain stripping achievements
  • There are 2 new events for when you masturbate a certain amount in freeform stripping.
  • There is a new event for when you hide for a certain amount of time.
  • Improved performance significantly
  • There is are new events for when you strip naked in the street an amount of time.
  • (Most of these achievement events trigger automatically when you reach certain thresholds)
  • There are 2 new events for when you are seen by a certain number of people.
  • There is a new feature that indicates the direction of hearts.
  • Fixed problem if you didn't chose to play with Sara she blocked your progress at the beginning of daytime.
Release Notes 0.11.1

  • NPCs will no longer chase you during events.
  • I think I've resolved issues with game failure states.
  • Events that dress/undress you properly relocate your clothing items
  • Cascading NPC count now actually works
  • Chasing NPCs can no longer see through walls.
  • Chasing NPCs give up if you hide successfully.
  • Chasing NPCs need to be closer before they "game over" you
  • Wrote a new bark mechanic
  • During the day, NPCs "bark" (little messages over their heads)
  • Player barks certain complaints rather than interupt the game flow.
  • Updated heart icons for consistancy.
Release Notes 0.11.2

  • Version number updated
  • Fixed clothing system in prologue
  • Fixed clothing and dress state in chapter 1
  • Fixed clothing and dress state in chapter 2
  • Added freeform events to progress
Release Notes 0.11.3

  • Fixed crash when you open and close menu and someone is "barking"
  • Improved self barks around fear, chase mode and hiding.
  • Added visual effect when in chase mode.
  • Added visual effect when in high excitement.
  • (Note: the last two are are a bit experimental)
  • Improving balancing, how fast and slow excitement and fear go up and down.
  • Improved ability to reach higher levels. Fixed problem where some events could not be done if you fast entered daytime.
  • Fixed college to indicate nearby hearts
  • Made it easier to get some of the dynamic(freeform stripping) scenes.
 

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Ultimate Torrent Dude
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Last edited:
4.10 star(s) 9 Votes