Ren'Py The Sin Within [v0.4] [CigarRex]

[CigarRex]

Not sure if OP made a mistake but at least for current version the game is not Sandbox.

You're right. I included it because the game already has a few sandbox mechanics coded in (like relationship points and gallery scene unlocks), but mostly because the next version will already introduce the sandbox part of it all.
I feel it's fair to tag it as such, since that one will release for everyone in two weeks. Letting everyone know what the game will be for the most part, and all that... Not everyone enjoys sandboxes, so I feel it would be dishonest to not tag it as such.
If someone contests this decision, I'll gladly remove the tag until we get there.

Wow, this was really good. Surprised at how much content was in it for a .1 release. Can't wait to see what future releases there are.

Definitely gonna be watching this one. In my opinion it was a strong first upload and enjoyed it a lot.

Thank you all! I can't wait to see the next release come forward

 

[ShirouryuuAkihito]

Replay Gallery? Implemented in the next version I guess?

 

[cooperdk]

He will have sex. But he's only an Illusion screenshot character, wo it won't be all that impressive.

 

[CigarRex]

Replay Gallery? Implemented in the next version I guess?

Yep

 

[VoitKO]

Very nice. Keep up the good work.

 

[CigarRex]

/stomps foot to shake the boards
damn these
/stomps foot to shake the boards
screen shakes
/stomps foot to shake the boards
are really
/stomps foot to shake the boards
annoying
/stomps foot to shake the boards
to read
/stomps foot to shake the boards
every other
/stomps foot to shake the boards
sentence
/stomps foot to shake the boards

remove the screen shake every second line holy shit

I've just implemented a slider to control the intensity of the screen shake
You can keep it as it is, tone it down, or turn it off completely. Works like a charm.
I think it'll be out for the 0.2 public release. I'll sort it out tomorrow


Thanks for the feedback!

 

[Midnight Ghost]

I've just implemented a slider to control the intensity of the screen shake
You can keep it as it is, tone it down, or turn it off completely. Works like a charm.
I think it'll be out for the 0.2 public release. I'll sort it out tomorrow

View attachment 2516473
Thanks for the feedback!

 

[Tiur]

(Edit from a couple weeks later: Not editing the main section of the post in the interest of transparency, but most of my concerns in this post have been resolved already after talks with the dev and the subsequent hotfix and 0.2 release.)

I tried this game because I'm pretty thick-skinned as harem fans go, and I've never minded the 'prostitute with a heart of gold who falls for the MC and becomes exclusively his' trope, which seemed to be what the comments were suggesting happens here.

First, some mechanical notes:

Waaaaaaay too much vpunch screen-shake. WAY too much. There are literally SEVEN HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE vpunch shakes in the prologue script file ALONE. There are 2684 total 'scene' lines in the same file. That's an absolutely massive ratio, over 27% of all scenes have a vpunch. I guess that would work if the entire game was set during an earthquake, but for this game, it's too much, and it does detract from the game's otherwise excellent technical quality significantly.

I understand the reasons to do sandbox. I really do. But your posts about what your plans are have several red flags.

• No one wants to do a repeatable scene over and over to grind up a love level to get the next progress scene with a girl. No one. Absolutely no one. Please, devs, stop making this a feature of sandbox games. It pleases no one.
• Also, no one wants to hunt around in various combinations of location + day of week + time of day just to find out where the next scene is.
• To combat this, you need a very robust hint system along with an easily-accessible no-penalty time-skip button.
• Don't lock hints or the time-skip button to a specific location. Don't make us hunt for it. Just put both of them right in the main UI or on the map.
• Without hints or an easy no-penalty time-skip, people are forced to click through a ton of empty locations hoping to find the scene they want. Some games even make players go to a specific location (their room, often) to use hints or time skips. Those games are extremely frustrating.

Now into the story part:

So. This game has some very good dialogue writing that felt relatively natural, great renders, adorable girls of all sizes which I liked, and some actual innovative handling of school scenes, which is actually kind of amazing. I did enjoy most of the update, right up until it turned really sour and unpleasant and gave me a strong distaste that lasted through the end of the current build. I was actively considering supporting until I hit the Night Club party/dance orgy scene, which shot that idea in the temple, then dragged its body out to the latrine and shot it some more for good measure as the scene escalated.

I'll spoiler the lengthy detailed breakdown because, well, it will contain significant spoilers. It's hard to talk about the problems with the game without talking about the events of the game.

Spoiler: Detailed Story Breakdown

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(Edit from a day later: CigarRex and I have had a long and productive discussion both in this thread and in DMs. Most of my criticisms here are being taken constructively, and I have the utmost respect for CigarRex as a dev, and urge people to make their own assessments, though if people have concerns about what I've posted, I recommend waiting for 0.2 before making a final decision.)

 

[CigarRex]

Why have you given the characters tumblr nose? Such a ridiculous style, people only look like that when they have a cold or the flu.

Haha
The red nose is a birthmark from the Harada family... It's a way to show their bonds run deep, indeed.
It's not present in other characters.

 

[Tiur]

How big is this game for there to be so many tags for v 0.1? Like ingame hours?

It's a pretty good length for an 0.1, and all those tags are accurate in-game except 'harem', which is not in-game yet, as the MC has not had sex with anyone yet.

 

[CigarRex]

I tried this game because I'm pretty thick-skinned as harem fans go, and I've never minded the 'prostitute with a heart of gold who falls for the MC and becomes exclusively his' trope, which seemed to be what the comments were suggesting happens here.

Oh god This is a monumental post. I'll try to address your points. Huge thanks for the insight, man. This is what I live for.

Waaaaaaay too much vpunch screen-shake.

I'll be adding a slider to let the player tone it down/shut it off in the next releases (just coded that earlier today). Maybe I should hotfix 0.1, too... It's a simple addition that makes all the difference, clearly.

Sorry for the exaggeration! This is 100% on me. I'll evaluate de-escalating its abundance going forward, too.

Now, the sandbox bullet points:

- I intend to be very lenient on the ratio between "love points earned" and the amount of repeatable scenes a character may have.
For example: Mom will be having around ~14 unique scenes for the first relationship level, of varying kinds and detail. Even still, each scene may bump her love points by 10, or 15? This means that, by just interacting with her, you'll easily max (100) her points out before seeing all the scenes w/ her. The same principle should follow suit for all other girls.
- Level Up events won't immediately take place when you reach 100, too. It simply opens the option to trigger them, at will. This way, you can explore all you want before progressing, or just going for the level up as soon as possible.
- There will be extensive hints as to where characters are, at any given moment. Their avatars will show up in the thumbnails for the locations, for instance.
Other, more obtuse events, will be listed with a clear indication as to where you should go to trigger it.

Spoiler

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- There will be a constant, ever-present time-skip button hanging at the top of the screen. You can use it anywhere, at any time. Passing time, moving around and navigating overall is meant to be as seamless as possible here. The same goes for the map and other navigation elements.
- You'll also be able to quickly warp back to your bedroom to get some sleep and skip the day, from anywhere, via the map. Sleeping, Time-skipping and moving around are all instantaneous, with no prompts or other bullshit interrupting you.
I never liked the fact that sandbox games have all these dumb, annoying quirks that should be very easy to work around and get rid of.
- Once again, the 'Phone' can also be accessed anywhere, at any time. That's where some more intricate hints will be, so I hope this covers these concerns... I really value the breadth of choices that a Sandbox allows, and I want to make it the least frustrating as I can.

Spoiler

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I'll try to address the points you made about the story on a following post. You made compelling arguments, and I value all of that tremendously.

 

[PeanutbutterJoe]

The red nose is a birthmark from the Harada family... It's a way to show their bonds run deep, indeed.

Their bonds or their booze? So many questions, so little answers.....

 

[CigarRex]

So. This game has some very good dialogue writing that felt relatively natural, great renders, adorable girls of all sizes which I liked, and some actual innovative handling of school scenes, which is actually kind of amazing. I did enjoy most of the update, right up until it turned really sour and unpleasant and gave me a strong distaste that lasted through the end of the current build.

Thank you, I-

which shot that idea in the temple, then dragged its body out to the latrine and shot it some more for good measure as the scene escalated.

We have a murder case here... Let's look at it.

What the hell happened at the Night-Club finale!!?

I don't think it will be possible to break down my intentions entirely, without spoiling major aspects of the coming story.
So...!

Spoiler

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I'm not even sure if I covered everything... Your post was fantastically well-written, and thorough to the bone. I genuinely loved every second of it, the good and bad alike.
And... I may have ruined my sleep schedule for today while writing all of this . Not very wise.

I look forward for your answer. Pardon any misunderstandings and else along the way... I genuinely mean my words here.

Thanks for the brutal honesty - this is what I value most in people.

I still wish to have you as a player in the future. See you soon, hopefully!

 

[Tiur]

Thank you, I-

We have a murder case here... Let's look at it.

What the hell happened at the Night-Club finale!!?

Heh. Sorry, the metaphor ran away with me.

Spoiler

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I'm not even sure if I covered everything... Your post was fantastically well-written, and thorough to the bone.

Thank you, and sorry about the length. I get overly verbose, particularly when I'm really enjoying something, then get frustrated at it.

I look forward for your answer. Pardon any misunderstandings and else along the way... I genuinely mean my words here.

Thanks for the brutal honesty - this is what I value most in people.

I'll admit I'm far more inclined to give you the benefit of the doubt purely based on your interactions with the community here.

I still wish to have you as a player in the future. See you soon, hopefully!

I probably will play the 0.2 when it comes out, to see where things are going. On the plus side, after that scene, it's hard to go anywhere but up? Eh? Eh? Silver linings?

 

[CigarRex]

Following on your points:

Spoiler

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Thank you, and sorry about the length. I get overly verbose, particularly when I'm really enjoying something, then get frustrated at it.

Hahah, I figured that would be the case
I know, because I do the exact same thing... No one rants so much about something, if they don't want to see that thing get better, genuinely. I appreciate the care you took to answer these, since there is still heaps of room for improvement.

I'll admit I'm far more inclined to give you the benefit of the doubt purely based on your interactions with the community here.

I probably will play the 0.2 when it comes out, to see where things are going.

Thank you!

On the plus side, after that scene, it's hard to go anywhere but up? Eh? Eh? Silver linings?

Well... I don't think there's anything as excessive as the Night-Club finale in 0.2, in that regard... There is a lot more focus on the MC going forward, as he takes agency over his new desires.

However...

Spoiler

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If I do follow through with all that revision, it's probably coming out this week. I'll have a little IRL hiccup for this Monday specially, so I hope it'll come out quick.
It most likely won't be perfect, but I'll try to remedy the issues you pointed out.
And yes, I'll roll out the 'Screen-Shake Magnitude' slider regardless of that, too. It really worked out as I wanted it to.
May GDrive have mercy on me...

And of course, I'll be keeping tabs on the tips you gave me! They are valuable, I may end up building a few guidelines to help me stay in touch with the Harem tag, as best as I can. It is a genre I genuinely want to follow through with fidelity, though I'm not nearly as much of a purist like the majority is, apparently.

Cheers, as always. Gotta go sleep first!

 

[DoranDuck]

damn, really liked what is in 0.1, cannot wait for 0.2

 

[Kacph]

i must say this game is very promising
very like and hope to see more very fast
but i must ask there gonna be more like BDSMPublic place or pregnancy?

 

[Ruykiru]

Damn that's one hell of start, good stuff

 

[CigarRex]

i must say this game is very promising
very like and hope to see more very fast
but i must ask there gonna be more like BDSMPublic place or pregnancy?

There are plans for more BDSM and Exhibitionism.
There also are plans for pregnancy, I'll just have to figure out ways to fit it in, since a Sandbox story is a challenging place to deal with this kink

Damn that's one hell of start, good stuff

damn, really liked what is in 0.1, cannot wait for 0.2

Thanks a ton! I'm also looking forward to see it release for all

 

[Ruykiru]

There are plans for more BDSM and Exhibitionism.
There also are plans for pregnancy, I'll just have to figure out ways to fit it in, since a Sandbox story is a challenging place to deal with this kink


Thanks a ton! I'm also looking forward to see it release for all

Hey, what's the deal with

Spoiler: the secret

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